While we’re still not sure why the Cubs didn’t ever bring outfielder Adam Greenberg back up to the majors once he recovered from being drilled in the head with a fastball in his first big league at bat, they did send him to get a little more baseball played this winter. The Hebrew Hammer is in Venezuela playing for Caribes de Oriente, which, from the Spanish I learned at NIU either means Carribbean of the East, or “disoriented centerfielders.” Either one sounds good.
While playing for the Carribbean of the east, Greenberg is keeping an online journal for MLB.com.
This will come in handy when he’s abducted. The kidnappers will be able to post their ransom demands right on Cubs.com. How handy.
In the first installment of his postcards from Venezuela, Greenberg tells us about rooming with Andy Pratt (you just know that he pees all over the bathroom, with his aim the toilet–if there even is one–doesn’t stand a chance), how dirty the hotel floors are (well, sure, Andy’s peeing on them), about the luxury transportation his team enjoys and what a great guy Hugo Chavez is. Hey, he doesn’t want to get shot.
Yesterday, the first trade of the offseason occured, and the Nationals traded Vinny Castilla and his mullet to the Padres for Brian Lawrence. I guess the exciting Joe Randa era in San Diego is already over. Every analysts first reaction to this is that Brian Lawrence will love pitching in RFK Stadium and what a steal it is for the Nats. But Lawrence was already pitching in a great pitcher’s park and things weren’t going all that swimmingly. I still hate Castilla from 2001 when he passed over the Cubs to sign with Houston because with Bill Mueller due to come back eventually from his broken knee, Vinny wanted to go someplace where he could start. After tanking it in Tampa (.215, two homers, nine RBI in 93 at bats), Vinny went to Houston and hit .270 with 23 homers nad 82 RBI in 445 at bats. The Cubs, meanwhile, used Ron Coomer, Delino DeShields and even Chad Meyers at third. And Mueller only played 70 games all year anyway.
There’s good news in Tampa, and it’s that they finally have a real general manager. They hired Gerry Hunsicker, you remember him, the guy who made the trades in Houston that the Cubs seem afraid to. Only, Gerry’s not really the general manager. Some 28 year old is. What the hell is going on in baseball? You either have to be 50 or 20 to be a GM. Theo Epstein will probably have to wait 20 years to get another job. Regardless of who’s calling the shots, it’s not the demented Chuck LaMar any more, and that means Aubrey Huff will actually get traded one of these days.
Huff had a dismal first half last year (.256, .319, .383) and was better, though not great in the second half (.267, .323, .481), but he’d be a pretty good guy to take a chance on. He averaged .304 with 31 homers and 105 RBI in 2003 and 2004, and he’s only 28.
The Rays are chock-full-o outfielders, especially with Delmon Young ready to hit the big leagues next year and the return of Rocco Baldelli from injury. In fact, it’ll be interesting to see what they do with Rocco. He got promoted to the big leagues way too early, and didn’t put up great numbers in his first two seasons, but he’s 6’4 and can legitimately play centerfield. He’s only drawn 60 walks in more than 1100 big league at bats, and struck out 216 times. But compared to Corey Patterson, he’s practically Wade Boggs.
Baldelli missed all of 2005 with Tommy John Disease. Which means when he’s talking to the Devil Rays about Huff, Jim Hendry can try to add Rocco to his bullpen.
Sean McAdam breaks down the free agent class and it’s pretty weak. The worst in years, actually. Which really makes you feel good that the Cubs refused to take a one-year payroll hit by sacking up and adding somebody last year and saving all of their money for this year when there’s nobody to use it on. McAdam lists the Cubs as a team after Billy Wagner, but we know that’s not true. They’re still patting themselves on the back for signing Ryan Dempster for five million a year to close, they’re not going to double that for another one.
I also like McAdam’s line that Nomar is healthy and ready to prove himself. Just like last year and the year before that, I suppose.
Greg Couch with a look at Rafael Furcal. He wonders if Chicago is a good place for a guy with an obvious drinking problem. Because there aren’t any bars or strip joints in Atlanta, or New York for that matter. I’ve got news for you. You can get drunk in any big league city at any time of the day or night. I’m not sure why Couch thinks it’s so interesting that when he got nailed for his DUI last year that Rafael had a large amount of money and a woman in his car, because Kyle Farnsworth gets pulled over all the time with money and a large amount of women in his car.
The Angels are going to throw a boatload of cash at Paul Konerko. It’s part 74 in their neverending quest to shove every bad Dodgers trade ever back in the faces of Tommy Lasorda. Cubs’ fans should hope the Sox overreact and match whatever obscene offer Konerko gets. He’s a good player, but he’s going to get a contract that will pay him for his next couple good years and then four of his decline years. That’d be a good long term investment for you Kenny Williams. You should go for that.
Teddy G. on Charlie Weis and just how much stuff Charlie is directly involved with at Notre Dame.
Rick Morrissey spun the big wheel of column ideas and today’s landed on “unintelligible drivel.”
Sports Guy’s NBA preview part one, and part two.
Bill Murray and Mike Veeck have offered Theo Epstein a GM job.
America’s finest news source says that President Bush has taken another step in stopping the spread of the Bird Flu. He’s ordered the mass slaughter of bald eagles.
“A large amount of cash and a woman…”
A large amount of cash? On his salary? Must be drug money or stolen.
A woman in his car? Is there a law in Georgia still on the books prohibiting a Braves shortstop from the Dominican Republic from being in a car with a woman?
Give him the chair.
Must be a typo. Much more incriminating if it’s “an amount of cash and a large woman.”
Better to have a cache of women, a large amount.
I’ve never had any combination thereof.
Corey Patterson, Todd Walker, Todd Wellemeyer, Michael Wuertz, Kerry Wood, Matt Murton, Renyel Pinto, Angel Guzman, for me?
Throw in Brian Dopriak and I’ll think about it.
If you’re at work, you probably shouldn’t click here. This is friggin’ hilarious though. Especially the questions section.
The timestamps on the posts seems to be using me.
Apparently, Andy forgot to do me.
We want Furcal…..We’ll keep a stool open for him and a tab running….
We’ve been having problems since Kyle left.
How come nobody can spell my last name?
Whooooo!
You’d think they could automate the frickin’ time stamp.
Note to self, don’t change the time in the middle of a thread. It goofs the order of the posts up.
Well #12, prbably because it’s a “Dopi” last name. Ha, gold, gold I tells ya.
We’ll be waiting for Furcal as well…
I’m surprised Andy had never heard that playing so many day games has historically fostered nightlife overdose for some Cubs players. It’s pretty well-known.
Today, I decide that I will invade the U.S. How, you ask? I send Big Z. He is already swimming there. The ocean currents are strong, so expect him in the next 5 hours or so. He is El Toro. He will bring your imperialst nation to its knees. Then, I send my Argentine friend Diego Maradona as back-up. He kick you all in the cajones, and then snort a fat line of cocaine off of your daughters’ behinds. Viva Venezuela Mang!
memo:
To: Adam Greenberg
From: Jim Hendry
While you’re down in Venezuela see if you can get a picture of the World Series trophy.
We’ve slipped. And fallen on our faces.
http://www.on-hoops.com/2005/11/04/meet-the-luvabulls-amy/
There’s bad…and then there’s us.
I guess I should thank Wirtzy for helping me not care about that organization
Not great, but good for a laugh.
Why did I leave the game again? Some people missed the game and it’s covered in any of the recaps.
I am a useless, racist, pretend Chicago fan.
Are we the perfect food?
No, no you are not.