Let me at that f#$%in' poser, Pujols!Today the Baseball Writers Association of America will announce the winner of the 2005 National League Most Valuable Player Award. The award will very likely be given by the BBWAA to an AARP member, Albert Pujols. If not Albert, then it’ll be Andruw Jones, though that’s kind of a long shot.

While it’s true that we hate the Cardinals here, and hate Pujols and the old urine sodded ballpark they’re in the process of crying over and tearing down, it won’t stop us from proclaiming to the heavens that a Pujols’ victory would be a crock.

Did Albert have a good year? Of course he did.

He hit .330 with 41 homers, 117 RBI and a 1.039 OPS.

That’s nice. Way to go!

Derrek Lee hit .335 with 48 homers, 107 RBI and a 1.080 OPS.

So that’s pretty close, even though Lee’s numbers are better. Lee also hit 50 doubles to Albert’s 38, outslugged him .662 to .609, had more hits and more triples.

To be fair Pujols had more stolen bases (really he had 16 and Lee had 15) and scored more runs (129 to Lee’s 120). Never mind that the Cardinals as a team outscored the Cubs by 102, and that Lee spent a lot of time handing his helmet and batting gloves to Chris Speier while Todd Walker carried his cap and glove out to him.

Ken Rosenthal of the Sporting News was on MLB’s XM Radio channel (not to be confused with MLB Radio, which is completely different–why?) yesterday saying that Lee had a great year, but there were a number of factors that go into the award. He said if it was a “player of the year” award, Lee would win easily.

Uh…isn’t it?

Rosenthal admitted that defensively Lee is “an impact player” and Pujols is “slightly above average.” But he said that Pujols had the pressure of playing on a good team, while Lee got to coast down the stretch.

Coast? The Cardinals won the division by 11 games and wrapped up a playoff spot on Memorial Day. Screw that. How many “big” games did Pujols have to win for the Cardinals?

Rosenthal said there are a lot of things that go into picking an MVP. The value part of valuable has multiple meanings.

OK, he’s right.

Well, let’s see. Derrek Lee won the Gold Glove at first base this year. He’s widely regarded as the best defensive first baseman in all of baseball, not just the National League. So that’s pretty good.

Derrek Lee won the Silver Slugger as the best hitting first baseman in the National League.

I don’t subscribe to this, but if you do, Lee’s monetary value is better because his production cost the Cubs $7.6 million, while Pujols’ cost the Cardinals $11 million.

But since I don’t care how much the guys get paid (hey, I’m not writing the checks) let’s just think of it this way.

How can you be the best defensive first baseman in the NL and the best offensive first baseman in the NL and watch another NL first baseman win the NL MVP? How does that make any sense at all?

Please, make a defensible argument that a guy can better than you on offense and defense and you’re more valuable? I guess it must have been that all-important 16th stolen base.

To be fair to Rosenthal, when asked who he voted for, for MVP he said, “Andruw Jones.”

That, I can live with. Giving the MVP to the Generalissimo just because he didn’t win it the last few years because of Barry Bonds, stinks on ice.

Which, brings us back to Busch Stadium…