Have you met my son?
He’s also a no-talent assclown!
If you allowed me to write a list of guys I’d like to kick in the scrotum, the list would be long, and distinguished and two Brennamans would be in the top ten. It is almost as though the helmet-haired father (Marty) and his pencil necked twit of a son are having a contest to see which one of them takes one in the nuts.
Apart from obnoxiously keeping the ‘h’ in his name when he shortens Thomas to tHom, the younger Brennaman should have been beaten with a rubber hose by Cubs fans almost two decades ago. The highlight of his career with the Cubs on WGN Radio and TV was the night somebody bashed his face in on a road trip and left him with a bruised jaw and a black eye.
This is the same, tiny little man who used to proclaim, upon the rare instance of the Cubs putting a runner on every base that, “The bases are filled with blue caps!” He also used to use the same call for long fly balls, which was, “This one’s deep and it’s into the seats!” OK, tHommy, there’s seats in fair and foul territory, which was it?
He left WGN in a huff when they refused to allow him to skip some games to do NFL football on Fox. They replaced him with Pat Hughes, and I think we all owe tHom a huge debt of thanks. We lost a whiny, self-absorbed jackass and replaced him with one of the best baseball announcers in radio history.
Of course, his departure allowed him to return in 2003 as the second string play-by-play announcer on Fox for the playoffs. With the Yankees and Red Sox playing in the ALCS, it was clear that Fox was going to send the ‘b’ team to the NLCS. (Although, when your teams include Joe Buck, Tim McCarver and tHom Brennaman, there really is no ‘a’ or ‘b’, just differing amounts of suck.)
So, it happened that tHom was in the booth when the Cubs took a 3-0 lead into the eighth inning of game six, and the Steve Bartman thing happened. tHom is now Captain Indignant about how awful Cubs’ fans were to Steve and how terrible Cubs’ fans are for treating him so poorly. It’s the same old saw that Jay Mariotti still puts down the doughnut to remind us about over and over.
Only it’s interesting, because the two biggest culprits in the whole thing were Fox TV and the Chicago Sun-Times. Fox kept showing Bartman, over and over and over again, after he knocked the ball away from Moises Alou. They had close ups of him, they panned back to show exactly where his seat was. This went on for hours (OK, it seemed like hours, it was probably 20 minutes).
If you don’t think Fox took him from relatively anonymous douche who should have kept his hands inside the ride at all times, to the dope with the green turtleneck and headphones who spazzed out and cost the Cubs the pennant, I can’t help you. But every time he returns, tHom blames only the Cubs fans.
As for his old man, he went off on this senile tirade on Wednesday night when in a surprisingly funny show of solidarity, Cubs fans lobbed around 20 baseballs onto the field after Adam Dunn hit one onto Waveland. Marty, who was in full red-ass mode all week because of the shoddy treatment he felt his beloved Dusty Baker was receiving from Cubs fans, went off.
This is the kind of thing, honestly, right now, that makes you want to see the Chicago Cubs team lose…Far and away the most obnoxious fans in baseball in this league, are those who follow this team right here.
First of all Marty…if that is your real name, and it’s not…your real first name is Franchester. Wow, no wonder he likes Gabor Bako. Anyway, first of all, you have met Cardinals fans, right? So calm down. Secondly, nobody gives a shit what you think. Sure, you happened to be in Cincinnati when the Big Red Machine was there, but baseball hasn’t been relevant in your town in almost 15 years now. All you have to do to keep yourself occupied is to get upset when Ron Santo makes fun of a fatass like Danny Graves for how many doughnuts the guys eats. (Ron should never have allowed the hairdo to force him into an apology for that, though Graves handled it well, he autographed a box of Krispy Kremes and sent them up to Ron and Pat.)
What I liked most, is that when I checked out Marty’s wiki page (where I found out he’s named Franchester), another obnoxious Cubs fan had already stopped by to help update the info for us.
Kudos. My main contribution to Wikipedia was when I got a line about Bill Self’s toupee into his Wiki and it lasted for almost six full months.
So what have we learned? That tHom and Marty are both petty, bitter men with bad haircuts who harbor deep resentment towards the Cubs? I think that’s exactly what we’ve learned. And, we are free to enjoy it.
Who the hell names their kid Franchester? In any generation.
Was his dad a butler for the Taft family?
The Trib has thoughtfully posted the audio…
http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/cubs/cs-080417-marty-brennaman-chicago-cubs-reds,1,6962881.mp3file
Maybe the Cubs can invite Mia Franchester to sing the stretch a la Bob Uecker? That way we can launch our next volley at his head.
The thing that gets overlooked is the part where mArty mentions how he heard all winter that the Cubs were the division favorites for 2008, but in the end “they won’t win it because they’re the Cubs”. Hey Assclown, check your media guide and you’ll see they’re the DEFENDING NL Central Champions, so that shoots your stupid reasoning all to hell.
ONLY SOX’S FAN CAN TALK ABOUT THE BELOVED LIKE THAT !!!!!
He was born in 1942? Punk kid!
So now I’m not the most hated ex-Cubs announcer any longer? tHom and Milo get all the venom? That’s swell news! Hey, go get those Pittsburghers this weekend, those Battlin’ Buckos are sure a great young team.
Also, tell tHom I’ll yet find and pop one for him on the sally that gave him a shiner. We girls have to stick together.
The clown makes a living sitting on his ass, basing his entire life’s worth of baseball analysis on what is said before and after the game by cigar-chomping nitwits in the media and he has the audacity to piss and moan about Cubs fans? Kicks in the nuts all the way around….Chip, Thom, Marty….I wish I had three feet.
we should hang those friggin brennaman jokes from the highest yardarm. friggin chewing tobacco spittin, mullet wearing, pick em up driving shites that they represent.
I told Silva Waddle that the mouth-breathers who root on the fowl at the Big Urinal Cake II are the best fans in baseball..
uh Marty? You want to see “screwed up?” – look no further than the Reds’ dugout..
Deserves to be told how good his comment was.
“basing his entire life’s worth of baseball analysis on what is said before and after the game by cigar-chomping nitwits in the media”
Awesome.
Two of my favorite Thom moments – a Cub pitcher doubles and a jacket is brought out to him and Thom says – “He grabs the jacket and slips that bad boy on.” What a douche.
The second was when he informed fans about meeting some old frat buddies when the Cubs were in New York and being absolutely amazed by an area he’d never heard of called (best appreciated in Tom’s jive announcer voice) the Upper East Siiiiiide. A bitter garbage family.
“His son, Thom Brennaman, is a douche as well. He has worked with the Reds and the Chicago Cubs, and was a television broadcaster with the Arizona Diamondbacks and the number two baseball play-by-play man (behind Joe Buck) on Fox Sports’ Major League Baseball broadcasts. On October 4, 2006, a press release by the Cincinnati Reds reported that Thom will be joining his father in the Reds’ booth in 2007.[2] He is openly a homosexual and no one is quite sure what his father was high on when he mis-spelled his son’s name on his birth certificate.”
There is no fury like the Cubs fan’s fury.
I never liked the son, now I can say the same about ol’ Franchester, too. Who the hell is he to judge all Cubs fans by the actions of a few?
And by saying that I am in no way criticizing those fans who threw the baseballs onto the field. Marty needs to loosen up and get the large male appendage out of his ass. (Thom, too, for that matter.)
and Chip, you are great. i was always sorry to see you go. best regards.
Brennaman’s spot on correct. How many times during any random season is Wrigley Filed littered with debris from the fans? You don’t see this type of lunacy on a regular basis at other parks.
You’ve obviously never been to Milwaukee…or Philly
Whether you condone the throwing of balls back onto the field or not, there is no excuse for the unprofessional tirade by Marty Brennaman that resulted from it. He had no call to label all Cubs fans obnoxious,
nor use his very public forum to grind his very petty axe.
First all I’d like to say what a fuckin Moron you are. Course being a Scrubs fan is enough. Cubs fans are nothing but babies and sore losers. I’d like to take , Ron Santo and those 2 assclowns WGN who do the Scrubs TV games and shit on them all and make them eat it. Maybe when the CUBS screw up again and l ose in SEP, someone can kill another goat and put it on Harrys statue. DUmb Ass Cubs fans,
And also F_C_K fac e Danny Graves hasnt been in CIn in years. And lets see we won Back 2 Back in 75 & 76..Then 1990. And Lou didn’t have s))hit to do with 1990 That was Pete Roses team in reality. I F__U__C_K ing hate Wrigley Field and all u idiot CUBS FANS. Know that we in Cincinnati hate the CUBS and u fans. Your blog is grabage just like u.
Apparently very rare.
I likes me some nice grabage.
What’s wrong, someone finally with the balls to call you all the front-runners that you are?
1908.
Front-runners? I thought we need to root for a perennial winner to be a bunch of front-runners?
I think the Reds’ fans tolerance of Marge Schott and Pete Rose are two good reasons right here to root against this Cincinnati Reds team.