Our old pal Elias Coblentz is back and this time he’s not ranting about Jim Edmonds or explaining the Mandingo fantasies he’s been having about Derrek Lee. Today Elias is, for no apparent reason, telling the world five unusual things about him.
They include, but are not limited to: 1) A love of the Hall and Oates classic “Maneater”, 2) The use of the word “razzed”, 3) him wearing an Indian headdress and dancing to Village People songs, 4) the fact that he uses little kids’ shampoo–as bait, most likely and 5) that his wife’s name is Gary.
One of those things is not true. But really, any of them being true is disturbing.
[Youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hf2gM7eP8dI]
Damn you Dolan for enticing me into listening to 4:53 of that. That’s all I could handle.
I know 5 things you don’t need to know about Rich Hill.
Andy, I think you have a man crush on this nancy boy.
One other interesting factoid about Elias:
He’s gheyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
This has to be an actor. The Lassie rant was at least somewhat realistic, but the shit in this one is just bizarre.
The oddest bit to my mind is that the use of “Suave for Kids” seems to be self-described as the most unusual attribute. I hate to say it, but this kid is a hair’s breadth from Han Yong-un territory.
It must be a pain to have to iron all those Tards T-shirts, considering you have to remove the microwave and coffee maker from on top of the ironing board each time.
“As a child in the seventh grade…” When did this asshole get the ability to predict the future?
I wonder if my wife has realized that I am a flaming homo yet?
Wait, I wonder if I realize that I am a flaming homo yet?
Go Cards.
Please send all unwanted ESPN mags to me. I go through them very quickly.
Does that mean that there is something wrong with me?
Jesus tell me what to do?
We do have some kick-ass dances!
This is too good to be true. This might be one of Dolan’s buddies posing as some kid in St. Louis for material on a slow news day.
poseur, that’s what I’m saying. Andy is branching out. Best guess is that he’s trained his family gimp to do more than just wear that leather mask and perform sex tasks. dirty bastige.
Clearly “native american”