The guys at Home Run Derby ran some photos of Alfonso Soriano’s conservative, eco-conscious, Hybrid SmartCar the other day.  It’s disguised as a big assed H2 with enough speakers in it for Curtis Pride to hear.

Just take a look at this thing.

Now you know how the negotations went in the fall of 2006 between the Cubs and Soriano.

Jim Hendry: As high as I can go is six years, $120 million.  That’s it. That’s the limit.

Soriano whispers to his agent.

Soriano’s agent: It’s gonna take seven years and $126 million.

Hendry: We don’t really want to go to a seventh year, even if it is only for an extra six million.

Soriano whispers to his agent.

Soriano’s agent: This is very important to Alfonso.  He wants to play seven more years, and he wants to do it all for one team.  You see, his dream, ever since he was a little boy in the Dominican was to buy a street legal version of a military grade transport vehicle, paint it the color of the Major League Baseball team he plays for, have his name engraved in sterling silver on the hood, have a team logo gas cap, and trick it out with enough sound equipment to knock the caps off of Gary Busey’s teeth.

Jim Hendry: Why didn’t you say so?  Who here doesn’t have that dream!?!  Sign here!