I’m off today and Karry was going to fill in and do the Dose, but the new FHM with Tara Reid and Heather Mitts arrived in the mail, and when you add that to the Maxim we got with Anna Kournikova and Kimberly Caldwell, and well, let’s just say the bathroom door is locked and Karry keeps yelling, “We’re almost out of Jergens!” I have no idea. I’m just glad I’m leaving in a couple minutes.
But, a couple things caught my eye and they can’t wait for tomorrow’s Dose:
El Pulpo got his nickname from Moises Alou when they were both in Florida, and he’s taken it upon himself to nickname Carlos Zambrano, “El Tortuga”, which means ‘the turtle.’ I like it, because Carlos kind of looks like one of those giant turtles. Pulpo claims it’s because Carlos is “coming out of his shell.” But whatever.
The other thing is even more interesting. Scroll down through Mike Kiley’s Cubs notes to the part where Prior, Wood and Clement have allegedly joined a fax campaign in support of Cubs fans turning down the sound on Chip and Steve and listening to Pat and Ron instead. Somebody get me that fax number.
I heard the part of the WGN radio broadcast yesterday when the Wood/Prior/Clement fax came to Santo’s attention. He was howling and Hughes was playing the straight guy, but you know that they were really pretty pleased with that. I wonder where this development will register on Chip’s Terror Alert scale.
Oh man oh man oh man I was LOVING it last night! "Watch this," I said to my loving fiancee (an ex-Cardinals fan who has been brought over to the blue side…) "The Genius is going to blow this one."
Bottom of the 9th, score tied 5-5. Pirates have a man on 2nd with 2 outs. LaRussa has the next guy intentionally walked.
I can understand that – you’re setting up a force play in case the ball gets put in play somewhere where you won’t have any chance to get the batter at first.
What I could NOT figure out was him intentionally walking THE NEXT GUY. So he could get his lefty-lefty matchup? God bless you, Lloyd McClendon, for saying "What’s this crizzap about lefty-lefty matchups? I’m letting the Sausage-Beater bat!"
I mean, what the hell?! He intentionally walks the lead runner over to third in the bottom of the 9th? A wild pitch – game over. A passed ball – game over. Any kind of infield error – game over.
Lefty – lefty, my ass!
Anyhow, Randall Simon dinks an 0-2 pitch past the shortstop for what probably could’ve just been a basehit resulting in the bases-loaded with two outs, but instead proved the game-winning hit thanks to the Genius’ strategies.
Man oh man, I was in a bad mood until I saw that. That elevated the spirits…
I can’t wait for that five-game series in Wrigley to start September. The Cardinals will be buried.
Has any team in baseball trotted out three worse hitters in the 7-8-9 order than Augie Ojeda, Paul Bako, and Matt Clement?
Chip that homer off of Kerry Wood was for you, honey. How dare that Texan encourage people to turn you off.
THIS Texan is always encouraged to turn you on.
It’s very simple, Jim Hendry. Chip goes, or we go.
What’s it going to be?
Whoa whoa whoa! Not so fast there Matty. The only 3 authorized to get email on that account are Kid K, The Franchise and Big Z. We’ve taken the liberty to set up and email addy for you at gettingtradedwhenbrownlieisready@cubs.com.
Sincerely,
The Three Amigos
I’m greatly saddened by lack of effort from Desipio readers today. Andy leads off with the mention of not one, but FOUR hot chicks along with masturbatory rhetoric and all you guys can do is talk about baseball. There was a time when the death of a president would somehow lead to photos of Anna. What’s become of you? Lets see some effort damnit!
Well, I do have the cool chinstrap. And I got a big win today, which is nice. And Biggio didn’t take me deep and give Chip and opportunity to orgasm on the air.
Does that mean that we should call Keith Van Horn "El Overcoata" because he’s due to come out of the closet?
"El Sucko" is my nickname for Estes.
Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution. by free online poker