But you knew that somebody would be pissed off about it.Â Even if a gun has about as much place in a big league clubhouse as David Patton.
And, you just knew that the somebody who would be pissed off about it would play for the Cardinals.
Because really, they need to come up with more ways to kill themselves.Â Apparently, getting drunk and plowing into a parked tow-truck is too labor intensive.Â Why not just pull a gun out of your lock and start blasting away.
Right, Ryan Franklin?
“If you grew up around it, being in the outdoors and stuff, I was taught as a young kid how to respect firearms,” Franklin said following Saturday’s workout. “First of all, you don’t get stupid with it. Always treat a gun like it’s loaded. That’s what I taught my son and daughters. There’s a place for them.”
Look, I understand that Ryan Franklin is a knuckle-dragging half-wit.Â I mean, just look at the guy:
Well, of course it does.
Just why exactly would anyone other than an on-duty policeman need a gun at the ballpark?
Unless you plan on shooting a Korean pitcher to prevent him from killing an osprey with a baseball, you’re probably never going to have a good reason to open fire.
And if you’re Ryan Franklin, you should only fear two things this spring.
1) That your new batting coach will drag you into a bathroom stall and try to “inject you.”
2) That the Cardinals will remember how you fell apart in September and then in the playoffs.Â Sure, Matt Holliday shouldn’t have tried to catch that two out flyball with his nutsack, but you probably didn’t have to allow the next four batters to reach base, either.
The fact that you think the place that “there’s a place for” firearms is your place of business just proves what a raging douchebag you are.