Perhaps the Bulls didn’t get the memo. Maybe they had their call forwarding screwed up. Whatever it was, last night’s effort against the Washington Wizards was positively 1999 all over again.
I don’t want to go all Jay Mariotti on you and throw doughnuts around the room and demand Bill Cartwright be fired, but it’s going to get pretty obvious, pretty soon, that Bill just isn’t an NBA coach.
The Bulls who brought in not one (John Bach) but two (Ron Adams) defensive gurus in the offseason, and they didn’t play any defense. Short of Scottie Pippen, they didn’t even look like they cared that they weren’t playing any.
Offensively, it was even worse. It’s like somebody told Jamal Crawford they were running the old Loyola Marymount offense. How many times did he come down the court and chuck up a shot without even looking for a pass to start the offense?
Granted, it’s only one game. But these were the Wizards, and if you can’t stay within 25 points of them on opening night, well, it’s going to be a looooooooooong year, isn’t it?
Sigh.
On the other hand, the ovations given to Scottie, when he was introduced and then when he had to give the now-requisite-somebody-from-the-home-team-has-to-thank-the-fans-for-showing-up-on-opening-night-thing-speech. If you didn’t get goose bumps, you have no soul. And, you’re probably a St. Louis Cardinals fan.
I’m not sure if Brendan Haywood is the second coming of Lew Alcindor, but the Bulls certainly approached this game like he was. They have Eddy Curry, the best offensive center in the conference and they got him 10 shots. Ten! Kendall Gill took 10 shots. Excuse me while I go flog myself.
By the way, John Kerr is beyond senile. I don’t know if it’s the goatee or the new girlfriend or what, but when you couple the fact that Bill Wennington is the radio guy and Red is the TV one, the Bulls have the worst color announcers in the world right now.
Crawford was 5-18. To break it down for you, that’s not good. Look, I’m not a guy who thinks that a point guard has to be Bob Cousy and wear the little tight nut-hugging shorts and take five shots a game. But when your team is down by ten points early in a game against the great Washington Wizards, how about trying to pass the ball a little bit. Jamal had four assists at the half. When the Bulls needed to put together a third quarter run to get back into the game he had to lead the charge. In the third quarter he had zero assists. In the fourth quarter he also had zero assists.
Guh.
The best thing about this is that it’s only one game. The Hawks come to town on Friday and their big offseason pick up was Terrell Brandon and he’s on the injured list forever. So we’ve got that going for us, which is nice.
—
LeBron James made his debut on ESPN and in true NBA fashion, the first game of the doubleheader, between the Knicks and Magic went into overtime. The only way it could have been worse would have been if Tracy McGrady had missed the plane and not played in the game. It was literally one watchable player on the court with nine morons. So there was ESPN trying to hype the debut of LeBron and they had to go back to the Magic and Knicks. They showed the tip off in Sacramento and a couple of trips up the court and then had to switch back to Madison Square Garden. Just after they did it, LeBron put on a show. He nailed a jumper, hit a floater in the corner and took a feed on a breakaway for a tomahawk slam. On the next possession out on the break he passed up his own dunk for an underhand feed to Ricky Davis for a reverse dunk.
We were watching Howard Eisley throw up bricks in New York. Ah, that’s good stuff.
It’s almost as if Bud Selig were running the league last night.
You have the most talked about number one draft pick since Shaq and you have him make his debut in the late game in Sacramento? LeBron should have been the one in the Garden. Apparently, they’re just going to have to start consulting with me on this stuff.
—
Mark Grudzielanek filed for free agency yesterday, which means that the Cubs can now only cut his salary by 20 percent if they resign him. That could be a problem.
Meanwhile, in Boston, the Red Sox waived Manny Ramirez. That’s right, they put him on irrevocable waivers. If you want him and his $20 million contract, he’s yours for four years. Of course, the Cubs should do this.
Can you imagine going Sosa-Ramirez-Ramirez-Patterson through the heart of the Cubs order? If you consider that the Cubs are paying Moises Alou $9 million next year, what’s an extra $11 million for Manny? They could trade Alou to San Francisco or Boston. He doesn’t have 10-5 rights with the Cubs so he can’t block it.
Of course, there are two huge problems. One, the Tribune Company won’t do it. Two, if they did, it would kick up a Sammy Sosa s@#$ storm of epic proportions. He’s only going to make $17 million next year. Next year he’s only going to make $16 million. Those are $7 million reasons why he’d be unhappy with Manny making $40 million over the same span.
But I think he’d get over it.
But that’s just me.
Rob Neyer wrote that the Yankees wouldn’t sign Ramirez because they have nowhere to play him. They want to move Alfonso Soriano to centerfield, Bernie Williams to left and Hideki Matt Suhey to right. Neyer says that with the Jason Giambi/Nick Johnson combo at first base and DH that there’s no where to play Manny. Oh, Flannel Boy, you dimwit. Do we really think the Yankees wouldn’t trade Nick Johnson in a heartbeat? That opens DH for Manny. The Yankees are not the kind of team that picks Nick Johnson over Manny Ramirez. They didn’t win 26 World Championships by keeping the no power, good average player over the good power, good average player.
So where does Manny end up? I have a hunch he’ll be Peter Angelos’ new toy in Baltimore. But that’s just me.
—
Bulls’ fans cheered at the beginning and then booed the rest of the night. Sigh.
Jerry Krause went to practice and somebody hugged him. That’s seems a little excessive.
Tyson’s fighting mad that he didn’t get to play.
Suddenly, the Bears veterans are feeling healthy, again. Gee, I wonder why?
The A-Train will be back on Sunday. We’ll all miss the Brock Forsey era, though, won’t we?
Frank Thomas will likely pick up his own option today. He has few others.
Greg Couch laughs at the delusional Dick Jauron who thinks the Bears could make the playoffs. They’d have a hard time making the 6A state playoffs.
Mariotti puts down the doughnut to throw his fat ass off the Bulls’ bandwagon.
Doctors say that Ron Santo should recover fully from having his bladder ripped out.
More than you ever wanted to know about bladder removal surgery.
Sammy’s coming back. El Pulpo and Dave Veres are riding off into the sunset. Thank God.
Lacy J. Banks on Kendall Gill.
Flannel Boy’s Manny Ramirez article.
LeBron made a pretty nice impression last night.
The current MLB free agent list.
Somebody paid three grand for a toy dog that Elvis once dry humped.
Apparently people in California are too dumb to vote, too.
A badger trapped a family inside their house. Oh, so that’s where Brent Moss is.
America’s finest news source tells us how our nation’s college students are coping with rising tuition costs.
Is there a Waldorf in Chicago that I can live in?
I’d also like to see if I could get a designated runner, because I get sleepy out there on the bases.
Otherwise I’d love to play for the Cubs. Or even that other team, the one that doesn’t have any fans. It’s nice and quiet there. I can sleep like a baby in that park.
That’d be great Manny, I sleep much better during the games when I’ve got somebody to snuggle up with.
I wouldn’t be surprised if the Yankees picked up Manny, he’s always been pretty popular in New York. I remember going to a Yankees/Indians game in the Bronx, back when Manny was still with the Tribe. There were like 3 sections of guys there, solely to cheer for Ramirez. They brought these huge drums with them, and whenever he came to bat, they’d start chanting Manny, Manny and then beat the drums.
We don’t beat the drums. We beat each other–like drums.
Because I’m a dope, I keep forgetting to post the link to this article
http://money.cnn.com/2003/10/28/news/companies/tyco_party/index.htm?cnn=yes
Sent in by Intrepid Reader Chuck Shipman about the wild parties the Tyco embezzlers used to throw.
As Chuck says, it’s going to be awfully tough to drink vodka now.
Woo-hoo! Time to by my stock, baby!
Okay, maybe they were beating Yankees fans instead of drums, but they sure liked Manny.
Uh-huh, they paid 3,000 pounds for my humpdog – which I believe at current exchange rates is something like 55 cents……
What about shipping Alou and Choi or Kelton to KC for Beltran (maybe a draft pick too)? The Cubs would have to eat some of his contract, maybe 5 mil or so. KC is done w/ Alou after this year, they get a good hitter that can DH, get a young guy and maybe a pick instead of letting him walk. Then we could watch Beltran, C-Pat and Sosa roam the land. The draft pick will be pretty lousy considering we’ve played well. Not to mention that we don’t really need to get that much younger.
I’m worth more than 55 cents.
Hi, I’m currently at 1.70249 dollars for 1 pound. But you were close. That doggie in the window was purchased for a little over US$5,100.
At that rate, I’m worth about $595.00
(If you are a Cardinal fan, don’t try to understand that one…morans)
I hope somebody claims Manny Ramirez. Do you know what I could do with an extra $20 million this year? Heck, I could probably sign three pitchers the caliber of Byung Hyun-Kim! Or, I could pay six more Jeremy Giambi’s! Oh, this is gonna be sweet.
Sorry, I’ve got to run, my band is practicing covers of some old Edison Lighthouse tunes!
Is it wrong that I now want to change my fantasy basketball team’s name to Elvis’ Humpdog?
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who help me in
moving
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involved in the excess
allocation.
However, the legislators of the new democratic
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and parastatals. I do not want the panel to discover
the money I saved.
I cannot lodge this money into my private bank
account. In my country, public servants are not
permitted to operate any account in excess of $500,000
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whom the sum will be transferred to. I have concluded
arrangement and transfered this money to a finance
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seizing this fund .
All you have to do is to give me your private
address,
phone and fax lines and banking particulars. I will
send you the details of the transfer and necessary
document as soon as you provide them.
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amount. You will keep the remaining sum for my wife
pending
her arrival to your country. We intend to invest 50%
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investment. We would want to know the lucrative
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Don’t worry about any problem in this business. I
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except my partner and me. However, this transaction
should be secret and confidential.
I awaits your reply on your participation or not, so
that I can search for another willing person. Your
quick response matters.
Best regards
Dr. Lukman Rilwanu
Ahh, saved by the good doctor!
Think you can transfer the $37.5 in Bartolo Colon’s bank account and say it came from Uncle Jerry?
Me too. I have several hundreds of dollars in Subway coupons from the numerous college campuses I have been a part of. Just send me your address, a check for $52,000 and the head of Alfredo Garcia on a plate, and I’ll send you these yummy coupons.
Okay, who invited Dr. Lukman to the party? Somebody escort this man to the door. The woman and the beer he brought can stay, of course, but the good doctor himself needs to go home and sleep this one off. I haven’t heard such nonsense since a Lester Hayes interview.
Be I just be wanting to be saying that Dr. Luke-ee Loo be saying what be needing to be saying and be said.
True ‘dat.
OK, here we’ve got Lonnie, Raj, Jugdish and of course, Dr. Lukman.
Unfortunately, in the good ol’ MLB, you can’t trade draft picks.
Eeyore will likely stay in LF.
Is it just me, or does this Ramirez move make too much sense for the Cubbies to do?
The rotting corpse of Moises Alou is stuck in left next year barring a miracle. There’s no way he’s going to stay healthy all season again next year… Come on Jimmy, pull the trigger!!!
Hey, Dolan, where’s your Ed review? We don’t all have Tivo, you know.
Rilwanu spelled backwards is Unawlir.
Campbell’s Soup is donating up to 5 million cans of soup to foodshelves in the areas with NFL teams. In the early days of the promotion, Packers fans have jumped on board and have nearly 64,000 cans designated to the Packers as of this writing. The Vikings are currently fourth with almost 17,500. Heck Detroit (just over 10,000) is even ahead of the Bears who only have 5,500 so far! If you designate a can or more for the Bears now, maybe they can at least win at something.
If you want to designate your cans to the Bears, that’s great. If you want to do it for another team, that’s fine too. Every time you click on, someone who is hungry will have something to eat. The website address is http://www.chunky.com/click_for_cans.asp and, if you can’t automatically connect to the site, please write it down and pass it on to your friends. And return often to cast another vote. It will mean a lot.
Campbell’s Soup is donating up to 5 million cans of soup to foodshelves in the areas with NFL teams. In the early days of the promotion, Packers fans have jumped on board and have nearly 64,000 cans designated to the Packers as of this writing. The Vikings are currently fourth with almost 17,500. Heck Detroit (just over 10,000) is even ahead of the Bears who only have 5,500 so far! If you designate a can or more for the Bears now, maybe they can at least win at something.
If you want to designate your cans to the Bears, that’s great. If you want to do it for another team, that’s fine too. Every time you click on, someone who is hungry will have something to eat. The website address is http://www.chunky.com/click_for_cans.asp and, if you can’t automatically connect to the site, please write it down and pass it on to your friends. And return often to cast another vote. It will mean a lot.
A quick note. In case nobody saw it last night, the first preseason college basketball poll came out last night. Illinois was voted 13th, Wisconsin 14th, and Indiana was tied… WITH UIC!!!
That’s great.
The only thing worse than being hit up for soup, is being hit up for soup twice.
Stuff it Soup Boy!
Hey, only I’m able to stuff soup down your throats!
Looks like Brian has reconciled with his wife, so he won’t be stuffing anything down my throat anytime soon…
yeah, yeah yeah. Manny Ramirez has glittering stats to match that glittering contract. So why would Theo put him on waivers? Because he’s a clubhouse cancer. Theo wants nothing more than to infect the Yankees’ clubhouse with cancer. We ain’t falling for that. We’re sticking with Alou one more year and using the Trib’s money to plug holes at 1B, 2B, and C, plus sign Kerry Wood to a long term deal.
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