Let?s get one thing immediately out of the way. I?m not a Star Trek fan, nor am I a Boston Public fan. However, I am a very big fan of tight fitting clothing, not to be worn by myself obviously. And any time I can work in a clever fitting title or topic to convey my appreciation in digital image form, I will do so. I sincerely believe it?s the very least I can do.

In this case Seven of Nine refers to seven of the last nine NFL teams, since 1970, to have won their first nine regular season games have gone on to the Super Bowl. You probably already know that last week the Chiefs became number ten with their win over the Green-less Browns.

Though simply playing the mediocre schedule they were given, Dick Vermeil has guided this year?s team to a comfortable 2-game lead for AFC home field advantage. Maintaining home field throughout is a necessity if Kansas City hopes to become the eighth team out of ten to go 9-0 on their way to a Super bowl appearance. This year the AFC is the equivalent of the NBA?s Western Conference. In K.C., Indianapolis, Tennessee, and to a lesser extent New England, you have the top four teams in the entire NFL. Playing two of those teams in Arrowhead Stadium may be the real X-factor, no disrespect to the Human Joystick that is Dante Hall. The little Pro Bowl return man that was one Gary Stills missed block from setting history with a 5th return for a touchdown. It?ll happen eventually—trust me.

Speaking of history, did you know that the Chiefs and the Royals represent the first time a city has ever produced an MLB and NFL team that won their first nine straight?

Trent Green has proven he should only be on your fantasy team?s bench if you?re a complete moron or just a tad bit slow/lazy/distracted (sorry Andy!), Tony Gonzalez and Priest Holmes are both finding the endzone with ease, while Johnnie Morton and Eddie Kennison are doing the freaking worm—are you kidding me? The team has scored 40 or more points four times this season, and if you?re a Bengal, what do you do before they bring their undefeated team in to Paul Brown Stadium? If you?re dumbass receiver Chad Johnson, you guarantee a win of course.

I?m sure your hapless defense really appreciated that Chad. As if this explosive team on a mission needed any additional motivation, you just made the coaching staff?s task of keeping the team from looking ahead to hosting conference rival Oakland next week a little easier.

But seriously, once Mr. Johnson has been taught his lesson this Sunday, what stands between the Chiefs and an undefeated season? One that would actually give them two more regular season wins than the ?72 Dolphins earned. Try Cincy, Oakland, San Diego, Denver, Detroit, Minnesota, and Chicago. Teams that are a combined 25-38. Think Urlacher can get over his ?sniffles? (if that?s all he caught from Paris he is indeed even more invincible than we all thought) to single-handedly stop Priest Holmes in Week 17? If he is, you can count on two Tony Gonzalez TD?s. Think the Bears can manage two TD?s and a field goal against Kansas City?s much improved D in Arrowhead? Why am I asking so many questions?

All to say this is a welcomed invitation for you Bears fans content to punt the remainder of this season with the hopes of finishing with a top 3 pick in the 2004 NFL Draft and selecting a self-proclaimed soldier to play in Soldier Field (see: Kellen Winslow, Jr.) to hop on the red and gold bandwagon. Just be glad you don?t have to go out and buy the hideous gear to fully support your hometown team.

In the worth mentioning category: The Oklahoma Sooner have outscored their opponents 129-9 in the last two weeks.

I don?t necessarily care to see a bland, mechanical quarterback like Jason White win the Heisman, but I?d say it really doesn?t matter who finishes 2nd in the BCS—this college football season is over.

And if you can?t believe I got this far without geeking over the upcoming college hoops season that makes two of us. We?re just over 48 hours away from a quality Coaches vs. Cancer eight-team field in Madison Square Garden where on Thursday night I believe you?ll see Wake Forest unimpressively edge Memphis and Marquette prove they?re just fine without Wade against St. John?s in a semi-hostile environment. On Friday night Pitt should handily defeat Alabama and in the most compelling match-up of the Classic I?m confident Gonzaga will make me look like a college hoops idiot savant, over a nice St. Joseph?s squad, and deserving of their top 5 pre-season ranking here at Desipio.

Finally, where in the hell were video games like this (PS2?s Smackdown) when we were kids?

And more importantly do you think the Division of Family Services will pay me a visit if Cameron finds one in her very first Christmas stocking?