People complain that we never talk about the Sox. Well, guess what? Today, we’re going to talk about the Sox. More specifically, we’re going to check out some of the things Frank Thomas said on Saturday.

Proving he’s the kind of take-charge team leader that every pennant contender needs, Thomas showed up late for the first team meeting of the year and then was late for batting practice. Also, proving he has the respect of every player on the team, the only reason anybody knew he was late for either was because Paul Konerko told the media.

Ahh, it’s just awe inspiring to see a team so unified after…uh…about an hour of practice.

After (or maybe during) the workout, Thomas sat in the dugout and charmed a group of reporters.

He complained about how much money he’s made:
“I was the first guy to get a long-term deal like that and there were some holes in it,” he said. “I use the example of Comiskey Park, or U.S. Cellular Field now. It was the first of the new stadiums, and it had a lot of holes in it and people are still complaining about it.

“I set myself up for disaster. I never thought it would come to that, but the team was losing money and not drawing well and … I got screwed.

What’s he saying? That him signing that long-term contract with the “diminshing skills” clause was a bad idea? Sure it was. But is he also saying that he was a trend setter? Nobody in the world was dumb enough to sign another deal like that. No trend there, Frank.

But, he says he’s not bitter.

“The reason I’m not as bitter as I would have been is that Kenny went out and made some serious moves for this ballclub. For the first time in a long time I feel we can have some baseball in October if everybody plays at a high level.”

That’s great. He’s not bitter. Then why is he sitting in the dugout bitching about his contract?

He was asked about his lack of leadership qualities.

“I think that has been overrated,” he said. “I’m all about the guys who give us a high level of play, someone like Magglio [Ordonez], who never talks too much but goes out to perform day in and day out. That’s a team leader. As for running your mouth and telling guys what to do and how to do it, it doesn’t work.”

So what is Frank saying? That Maggs is a leader because he sets an example of hard-work, professionalism and job performance? True. How does that exonerate Frank though for only working when he wants to, refusing to interact with teammates or for having one good season in the last five?

Frank had this to say about Paul Konerko—before he knew that Paul was ratting him out to the media. Apparently, Frank was asked about the situation that occurs when the Sox want Frank to play some first base.

“If he had put 12½ years in and won a few MVPs … he would have wanted an explanation, too, of why he wasn’t playing,” Thomas said. “Because I’ve seen him get very, very irritated when he’s sitting on the bench.”

And your point is…

But Thomas seemed more interested in explaining why Paul ripped him last summer for skipping a workout and batting practice. His reason:

“I know Paul and David Wells are very good friends,” Thomas said.

Well, sure, Wells criticized Frank two years ago for faking an injury, only to have to apologize when it was learned that Frank had torn his tricep muscle and would miss the rest of the year. So, in Frank’s world if that guy is friends with another guy who criticizes you, nobody should listen to the other guy, either.

Frank took a couple of shots at GM Kenny Williams who had critized Frank after last season, saying, “If Frank can fall in line with what we’re trying to do, we’d all be better.”

Frank no likey.

“It pissed me off a little bit,” Thomas said. “I’ve given this organization everything, even on the contract situations. I could have been the highest-paid player a couple of times but I never wanted it. I wanted to leave money free for other players so we can win. It’s no fun to lose every day.

That’s right Frank. You prove you’re a team leader by not asking for $15 million per, but somehow scraping by on $12.5 million. You are a martyr. And because of that, you don’t have to show up on time, or work on your defense or actually talk to other players on the team.

And your modesty is your greatest virtue.

“I’ve put in 12½ years and done some incredible things. I’ve done things that people have never done before. For me to be in the middle of the pack on salary on my own team, yeah, that’s a slap in the face.

“I have kids to support and I have a lifestyle to support and I like living my lifestyle, but you have to earn that. So I’ve been slapped down a little, but I’m used to that. I’ll come out fighting this year.”

Frank is only going to make $5 million this year, and how is he supposed to support his kids and live his lifestyle on that? I mean really, how can the Sox be that horrible to him. The guy has put up huge numbers in each of the last five years, and he’s not on the downside of his career. He’s still valuable at the plate, in the field and on the bases, right?

Uh, no.

In the past five years, Frank has had one average season (1998–.265 ba, 29 HR, 109 RBI), one great season (2000–.328, 43, 143), one season wiped out by injury (2001–20 games played) and two bad seasons (1999–.305, 15, 77 and 2002–.252, 28, 92).

You are probably saying, hey, those last two aren’t bad! They are when you’re making more than ten million dollars a year and can’t play the field at all. In this era of exploding offensive numbers, your DH had better be good for 30 homers, 100 RBI and at least a .290 batting average. In the past five years, Frank has only done that in the same season once, but in the other years he only has one season of better than a .290 average, didn’t hit 30 homers and only has one 100 RBI season. That smells like the numbers of a guy who should be happy to be making $5 million.

Frank is still mad that when he was struggling in July, that Jerry Manuel took him out of the lineup for three games without telling Frank why. Uh, Frank? In July last year you hit .232 with three homers and nine RBI. That followed a June in which you hit .212 with three homers and 13 RBI. You need an explanation for that?

“It hasn’t been rectified yet, but we’re going to sit down and have a long talk,” Thomas said. “We need to clear the air big-time … if we’re going to coexist.

“I have much respect for Jerry. He’s an easy guy to play for. All I want is more communication. If you’re going to sit me down, I can handle that. But don’t play mind games with me.”

So which is it? Do you need to have a sit down with him or is he an easy guy to play for? If your manager never talks to you, how easy can it be?

The Sox brought this on themselves. They could have simply exercised his diminishing skills clause and waived him. Let the Red Sox put up with him or somebody else. The Sox need a lefthanded slugger to add to the mix of righties Konerko, Ordonez, Carlos Lee and Joe Crede anyway. Instead, they tore up his old contract and came up with a new one for him that includes a $5 million salary this year with incentives and option years of $8 million in 2004, $11 million in 2005 and $12 million in 2006. If he’s traded, it automatically triggers the next year’s option. Meaning, if you trade him this year the team that gets him has to pay him $8 million next year. Who’s going to do that?

Thomas is what he is, he’s 34, 300 pounds and one of the moodiest people in the world. He built an $11 million home that he can’t sell, and the truth is that when you factor in his alimony and child support payments, plus the taxes on the house (assuming it’s paid for) it probably is hard to get by on $5 million. But who’s fault is that?
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The Grammy’s tried to pretend they’re not irrelevant anymore, but had a hard time pulling it off last night. The highlights included a great rendition of The Clash’s London Calling by an all-star band that included Bruce Springsteen, Elvis Costello, Dave Grohl and Silvio Dante…er, Steven Van Zant.

Simon and Garfunkel opened the show with “The Sound of Silence.” But was it really Art Garfunkel? He and Paul Simon are in negotiations for a reunion tour but they’re haggling over who gets paid what. I think Art skipped the Grammys and CBS hired

Sideshow Bob to fill in. Nobody noticed but me.

James Taylor’s a wuss, but pairing him with the equally low-key Yo Yo Ma for “Sweet Baby James” was a nice touch.

Dave Grohl’s girlfriend was a big hit.

Karry Ling chimed in with this observation, “I love the Dixie Chicks, but what’s with the fat one’s hair? Maybe she wants to safely ride a motorcycle without a helmet?”

Aretha Franklin apparently ate the Backstreet Boys backstage.

Every 40 year old woman in the world should, by law, have to look like Sheryl Crow.

Norah Jones won so many Grammy’s she started wearing them like hats.

Fred Durst opened his pie hole about the war like anybody cares what anybody named Fred says…ever.

The Bee Gees showed, sans Maurice, who was too dead to attend.

Every music group…ever…got a lifetime achievement Grammy.

Meadow Soprano was mugged by Ronnie Woo Woo after presenting an award.

And, of course, Sammy Sosa’s boombox won a Grammy for “best musical prop ever solely blamed for a 95 loss baseball team.”

—

Rosey on the Sox and Frank and all kinds of stuff.

Paul Konerko and Frank Thomas apparently kissed and made up while each took turns muffing ground balls at first base. Awwww.

Rick Morrissey says Magglio Ordonez has no ego. He has no personality, either.

Frank is untradeable. But you knew that already.

If the Bears don’t take a QB in the first round, there might not be a good one left 32 picks later.

Lenny Harris can play the infield as well as the outfield. Just as well. He would play either with all of the range of a statue. A very fat statue.

Mike Remlinger learned a lot in Atlanta. Yeah? So did Jeff Blauser.

Mariotti puts down the doughnut to go off on Frank.

Both Mark Grudzielanek and Eric Karros are hurt. They’re both still better than Todd Hundley.

ND-UConn, ESPN, tonight. Be there. Be green.

Kyle Boller is racing up the draft board. I knew he was good. I used Cal in a dynasty in NCAA Football 2002 two years ago and Kyle and I won a pair of national championships. Of course, I also won one at NIU with the Heisman Trophy winner at tailback. Me. So yeah, it’s pretty realistic.

Peter Gammons is all over the place in this week’s Sunday best.

David Wells has used ephedra and he’s not dead yet. At least not below the neck.

Flannel Boy opens his mailbag and proves once and for all that he’s a dope. First, he completely dodges a reader’s question about whether or not Chicago can “support” two teams. Then, he says that Las Vegas can’t support a baseball team. The fastest growing city in the country can’t “support” a baseball team, but the Sox, who have drawn two million fans once in the last six years are supported? Guh. Just give the Expos to the Maloofs and be done with it, already.

Don Banks on Kyle Boller.

Marty Burns’ mullet on why the Bucks and Sonics made their trade. Am I the only one who sees Gary Payton signing in New Jersey after Jason Kidd bolts for San Antonio?

Pete Rose can’t even make the Canadian Hall of Fame. Who beat him out, Bob MacKenzie?

USA Today on Mike Remlinger and the incredible amount of talent on the Cubs’ pitching staff. If that’s true, why then, is Rod Beck a threat to make the staff?

Ken Rosenthal says the Giants are going to bat Jose Cruz, Jr. third (that’s like batting Corey Patterson there) and he too loves the Cubs pitching. Or at least, Dusty Baker and Damian Miller told him to love it.

Ken Tucker says Grammy voters are dopes.

Joe Millionaire’s Alex McLeod explains why she was hardly on the show. She’s just glad the check didn’t bounce.

Sheryl Crow says the Grammys told her to keep her pie hole shut about the war. Yay Grammys!

In the name of the father, the son and… holy crap, Father! Put that thing away!

Hey Vern! I caught me another of them Nikes! What bait are you using?

The world’s greatest newspaper says that apparently cow dung does not cure AIDS. Damn.