Tomorrow is the Ides of April, April 15th. Not as famous as the preceding month’s Ides (Which is the date by which all Cardinal fans know their season is over… Oh, wait, and that Caesar guy died too I guess), but I’ll try to make do with what the calendar gives me. The Cubs seem to be back on track after their 8-3 win over the Pirates this afternoon. Aramis Ramirez finally hit something hard at a place a fielder wasn’t standing and hit two homers. Matt Clement struggled early but pitched well as the game went along. And Chip Caray confused Francis Beltran with Joe Borowski. Really, it was fun for everybody.

But you must know that every game is still both the highlight and the dread of my day. I can’t wait to see the game start. But, if the Cubs get behind, then that sinking feeling comes in. Why am I in this freaking playoff game mode in April? Did Games 6 and 7 jar my system so much that I can’t comprehend the difference between these games and the 2003 playoff games? Why am I still so into it, wanting to win so badly, but yet feeling the negativity when something bad happens? Then, it hit me today. Chip Caray made the reference. The Bartman seat reference. It was innocous, and both Chip and Steve were trying to be funny with it. The thing is, nobody was laughing with them (Or at least I didn’t). And, I realized, until the Cubs win a pennant, every time a foul ball goes down that line, near that wall, Bartman will be referenced. Is it fair to blame him? Probably not… But like the Curse of the Bambino in Boston, it’s going to become the easy way for everybody to remember what happened that night.

(And, now, for what will probably be a vain attempt at posting a picture…)

(I really hope that works, because it shows that the afraid-looking gentleman and the nice lady in the yellow were smart enough to realize that there might be a play, but Bartman, being the teacher of baseball he is, made a play for it.)

It may not be fair to blame him, but until the day I die I will be convinced that play was the absolute end of the run. No argument will be able to convince me otherwise. And, until we win that pennant, that’s just the way it’s going to be for me. Sorry if I’m sounding stubborn, but that’s the way it goes.

At least I don’t feel like putting up my “Dave Veres in a two-run Game 7” rant tonight. This column would be an absolute disaster if I did that.

So, in an effort to try to get some sort of sanity back while watching these games, I have decided to try to focus on the game itself. Granted, it hasn’t worked very well, but I think I am slowly improving. I’m still going to be pessimistic a lot of the time, but I think it would add years to my life if I didn’t think so negatively 100 percent of the time. So, I’m trying to cut it down to maybe 90 through this first month. And, when a game goes by when I don’t suddenly get so nervous in those tight situations, then I know I’ll be over what happened last year. That doesn’t mean I’ll forget or even forgive, but slowly accepting what happened is what I have to do. And the road to getting there is a long, winding one. And it’s a dead end until that second set of numbers turns to 00 across Sheffield.


OK, so I got lucky once…

On January 23, I said the following about Larry Bowa in a column (Which you can read here): “What I?m trying to say is, Bowa just isn?t that good a manager. I believe the Philly fans will see that when their team is in third place come August.”

Well, it’s April, and the Phillies aren’t in third. They are in last. It’s early, but this can’t be good. Jimy Williams is hoping Bowa can survive, because then he can remain the second-worst manager in the National League without even trying.

Iowa is on alert…

Andy Pratt got demoted. Maybe he can go to the Field of Dreams and switch into a doctor like in the movie. But, please… Do something, anything, to fix that control problem.

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I have a feeling this is only the second-best Britney picture posted on Desipio today. But I don’t care.

Brief bits of news…

This is just in.

This guy’s screwed.

And, finally… Seriously, this is the best the United States of America could do???


versus

I guess October and November can’t come soon enough. Yikes.

Enjoy your late Wednesday Night, Thursday, and beyond…