OK, sure, getting your ass handed to you on national TV is not exactly a fun way to break a six-game losing streak. Especially when the pummeler is a 6’10 pituitary freak who gets one hit a year whether he needs to or not, and he got it last night, with the bases loaded.

Let’s just chalk that up to bad luck, bad timing and the one truly bad outing that Carlos Zambrano is allowed this year. Did you hear that Carlos? Good.

The best news is that unless the Diamondbacks can swing a deal in the next eight hours, Curt Schilling’s not around, so the rest of the series just got a lot easier.

Besides, don’t you think that submitting a staring lineup where Jose Macias is leading off is a little like waving a white flag from the dugout? I thought so.


Former Sports Illustrated writer Jeff Pearlman (you may remember him for insulting David Wells’ mother and for writing down all of John Rocker’s insults) has written a book on my most hated baseball team of all time, the 1986 Mets. Sure the 1984 Padres deserve to be rounded up and set on fire, but these Mets were even worse.

Newsday excerpted a chapter on Darryl Strawberry and Doc Gooden which is a must read.

But this got me to thinking. How come nobody has written a book on the equally fascinating 1989 Chicago Cubs? Isn’t it almost like that season never happened? Did the Cubs really win the NL East that year with key contributions from Lloyd McClendon and Gary Varsho? Was Les Lancaster really a key component? Did Don Zimmer really use Steve Wilson as a spot starter and call for hit and runs with the bases loaded?

It did all happen.

And now it can be told. Desipio’s very own Karry Ling has penned “The Team that Came From Nowhere and Then Went Right Back — The ’89 Cubs”. Here’s an excerpt from the upcoming book to be published by Desipio Printing.

Pat Perry knew that baseball excellence was his destiny. At birth, the good Lord touched young Pat in a strange but powerful way. It wasn’t like the way Father Deacon touched him, which was just strange and tingly. Never mind that. Where were we? Oh, yes, the good Lord had taken a thunderbolt from the sky and touched Perry’s left arm with it.

When Perry was in high school he could hurl a baseball nearly 80 miles per hour. It was obvious, even then, that Pat Perry would one day take his place among baseball’s immortals.

In 1989, Pat Perry toed the rubber at Wrigley Field. He knew he had finally fulfilled a destiny set in motion years before in his hometown of Taylorville, Illinois. Perry was a dominant a lefthanded junkballer as the league had ever seen in 1989. His 77 mile per hour fastball was allergic to wood, sometimes spinning deviously over and around enemy bats. His hanging curveball may have yelled “hit me” as it loped to the plate, but for one year it fell harmlessly foul in the stands. Just a loud strike.

Perry would appear in 19 games for the Cubs and post an impressive (and somewhat unbelievable 1.77 ERA). Then, on a June day in Montreal, his arm fell off. Not like Dave Dravecky’s which had literally fallen off, but sort of like it, but not exactly. Perry’s Cubs career was over.

Perry still remembers the words of wisdom that Cubs manager Don Zimmer bestowed on him after the Cubs training staff told both men the news…the news they feared the most…the news that made Zimmer tear up…the news that there wasn’t any regular beer in the clubhouse and that they’d have to drink Labatt’s Light. Zimmer turned to Perry and fighting a losing battle with his own emotions said, “Tough break kid. I’ve seen a lot of pitchers in my day. And you’re one of them.”

Across the locker room sat a diminuitive Dominican born infielder named Domingo Ramos. Ramos had enjoyed some huge years in the big leagues, most of them with Seattle. In 1983, Ramos had hit .283 with two homers and ten RBI. Great numbers in any league. Ramos was listed on the Cubs roster at the start of the 1989 season as being 31 years old. He would later admit that in 1989 that he was actually 57 years old.

“It’s not like nobody could tell the difference,” he said. “I had the big Coke bottle glasses and a nice tan, so I looked younger than I was. And, I could really play. I had a great year in 1989. I help the Cubs win, and I lead league in big category.”

Ramos was right about that. In only 179 at bats in 1989 he had grounded into ten double plays. That ratio, more than one every 18 at bats led both the National and American Leagues, and is a mark that many players strive for today.

He petitioned commissioner Bart Giamatti in late 1992 to have the phrase “double play” removed from baseball and replaced with “pulling a Domingo.” He had little success.

“I send a letter to Commissioner Bart and I ask him for that,” Ramos said. “I thought he might go for it. But then, I find out he’s dead. I never hear back from him, so I guess he really was dead. That’s OK. I still think “pulling a Domingo” will catch on. I say it a lot. I joke with my wife sometimes that she should ‘pull a Domingo’, but I mean it a different way then.”

Oh, that’s going to be a great book.


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Randy Johnson’s still a big pain in the ass.

E-ramis actually made an error last night, but it was changed to a hit. How timely.

It kind of sounds to me like Chuck Wasserstrom gets paid to do something nobody in the Cubs front office actually cares about. It’s kind of like being the guy who plunges the toilets at US Cellular.

Chris Malcom wonders who these minor league baseball teams are. I think we all wonder who he is.

Groucho on the new, friendly, Rasheed Wallace. Whatever.

Mariotti puts down the doughnut to wax nostalgic about the Paytons.

Suddenly, the Cubs have lots of pitching options on the horizon.

Matt Clement would like to stay.

Scottie might serve a purpose after all.

The Sox hired Brooks Boyer. Brooks Boyer? What, Al Lorenzen wasn’t available?

Luol Deng is in the draft. Maybe.

Peter Gammons on Manny Ramirez.

Matt Drudge says that John Kerry got a $1000 haircut. How nice.

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