Pitching matchup
Pit: Josh Fogg, 3-4, 6.90 ERA
Cubs: The Franchise, 0-0, 0.00 ERA
Lineups
Pittsburgh
Jason Kendall, c
Jack Wilson, ss
Daryle Ward, rf
Craig Wilson, lf
Rob Mackowiak, 3b
Randall Simon, 1b
Tike Redman, cf
Jose Castillo, 2b
Josh Fogg, p
Cubs
Todd Walker, 2b
Derrrrek Lee, 1b
Corey Patterson, cf (you Boo him and Dusty moves him up in the order)
Moises Alou, lf
E-ramis Ramirez, 3b
Todd Hollandsworth, lf
Michael Barrett, c
Rey Ordonez, ss
The Franchise, p
Hope no one tries to hit me for acting like a jackass after I hit any of those bombs last week?
If that’s the case w/ Korey, he’ll be leading off in no time.
Hey, who’s the new guy?
He ain’t no Hall of Famer or nuthin’.
I’m back!
I was giving speeches last month, now I’m at wrigley.
He owns us.
What is my ERA against Pissburgh?
He gone!!
Steve wants to know if Lloyd will try and "even up the hit batsmen". Uh, didn’t they have four games last weekend to stand up for themselves?
That’d be just so typically Pirate.
I can’t believe that Dusty Baker is allowing Mark Prior to start after his actions last night in Naperville. For shame.
What’s his pitch count today? I’ll just swing at the first one.
Maybe he can throw a 27 pitch complete game.
Where’s Harry? Did he drive off in his Shagginwagon?
Two outs.
Is Pittsburgh in last place?
Gee, what a shock!
I believe it’s this Joe.
Wow, I forgot just how effortless I looked.
It’s just not fair.
PSYCHE!
It could be the shortest this season
Hell, anybody can have a good inning.
I’ll be back. You’ll see!
Here I come.
6 pitches, 3 outs, that’ll get him through about 15 innings.
FYI- From the Florida State League-
CHC A.Guzman 4.0IN 1H 0R 0ER 0BB 5K 3.20
Last 3 G: 14 IP, 6 H, 17 K
Hey I’m 1-11 (.091), I’m hot! Maybe I’ll hit third tomorrow?
I’ll be at West Tennessee by mid-June.
Wrigley by August.
Anyone see the Pirates/Card game yesterday? It sounded like Lloyd almost went after LaRussa.
Did Chip just say that Derrek Lee has a .257 team batting average.
What does that mean?
He didn’t "almost" go after The Genius, he got right in his face. It was a lovely sight.
You win three in a row and you might just move into first.
That’d be a trick being 4.5 back.
Off to a good start
Hey, Korey! Give me back my batting eye!
He did. You could see on the replay the ump tell him not to go over there and you could lip read Lloyd say "Oh, I’m going over there. I’m going over there." It was funny. Larussa jumped out of the dugout and immediately started whinning about how many guys the Bucs hit.
I’m setting the table for Corey now. I’ll be batting in the 1 spot by August.
Good thing I changed my name.
The crowd picked up on it quickly!
Hi Korey…Take me.
I get Korey every time
I’m fleet!
I put Patterson in front of Alou so Corey thinks the crowd is saying Alou.
They didn’t score on me!!!!
Korey! Thanks for showing teh crowd how I’ll look when I skip the rehab assignment.
I will freak shit if one of boys is hit today. Wouldn’t it be fun to watch?
Time to break up the no hitter.
Not this time
Typical Cubs luck would dictate that Prior allows no hits when his pitch count comes up so that a) The Farns can blow the no-hitter or b) Prior ends up throwing 20 more pitches than was prescribed or c) the Cubs don’t score and the games goes 21 innings.
You guys didn’t forget that I’m the best pitcher in baseball, did you? Just checking.
Who’s gonna close out the no hitter for me??? Not so fast Kyle…Sit down Joe…Sorry Mike…Not so fast Kent…What? Z doesn’t pitch relief? ALright…He you go Latroy.
Hey, Cubs, don’t forget that I suck. Feel free to light me up whenever.
Got the game for us, #4 in Center? Good. We’re all drinking Old Style.
Hey, I’m the man. I’ll close out Mark’s no-no, then pitch a complete game tomorrow. And I’ll throw at Lloyd McClendon in the dugout.
Not since a drunk talking parrot met TW has there been such a one-sided matchup….
That what a Cub offense can make you look like.
Is this what Hollandsworth is using? He’s better off trying to build Kon-Tiki than hitting with that.
I own the Cubs.
Jeez.. I don’t even right article here and I’m getting tossed in BC’s boat.
Which way am I blowing?
I am looking to break the game wiiiiide open!
I hit .317-8-27…guess where I bat in this lineup.
articles
You can call me Ray…
Pat and Ron are discussing Pam cooking spray.
Really.
It’s a shame about Ray….
"Fly ball, hammered…"
…200 feet.
Seriously. Do I have to also go 3-3 with a HR and 3 RBI to win this game?
Damn.
Hi, you might know me as the only Cub hitter who’s worth a damn.
A number pertaining to a Major League starting Shortstop.–Big Pley REY BA
You miss me, don’t you? C’mon, no one hit .083 like I did. Believe that.
Just wait until the second time through the order…then we’ll get him.
I’ve not allowed a baserunner since the 8th inning in October.
Somebody please stop me.
You’re in show business! Break a leg!
Uh Augie? No.
Uh Mark…We took you deep. Twice.
Hey! Gimme that pitch!
I feel for Sergio Mitre. He will end up like me. A footnote in history.
Wally, I lost my spot because I’m the worst starter on the team, you lost your spot in the lineup because you were a wuss.
I can’t believe no one figured me out yesterday.
![]("http://www.abbeyextrusions.com/images/garden%20hose.jpg"/)
![]("http://www.reasors.com/images/3storetour/grocery/pho_grocery_bag.jpg"/)
Admit it, I do look a lot like Craig Wilson. Also, I play the outfield like he does.
…hot dog!
Oh, Re-BUS..sorry, thought y’all were having flashbacks again…
TAKEN FOR BALL ONE!!!!!
The big one, elizabeth.
Nozzle Grocery? I don’t get it…
Can I please move up in the order?
Much like the President and Vice President, Lee and Patterson should not be in the same place at the same time, ever.
In this case, trying to drive home a runner from second with 1 or 2 outs.
Boooooooooo!
Why are paying Corey’s salary?
That’s because this is more appropriate…
Anyone see my new flick yet? I’m now 13 and pubing. The first scene? Under the covers of my bed playing with my wand.
From the director of "Y Tu Mama Tambien."
Anychance on a Desipio resize on that pic?
How fast am I throwing?
Fast enough
Even faster than me??
Who had the over/under on the first THis Old Cub mention at 3:09pm CT?
Chip is now chenneling me!
It’s nice to be nice to the nice.
It’s back
You can find info on me here too
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0408261/
Day off please!!
You had one yesterday, fogey!
This could be my best outing ever.
The sequel involves the murder of a woman on the Kimble-Ravenswood "L" line by a no-legged man.
Remember that time I lost a no-hitter 4-1? Why do I think I may be seeing history repeat itself today?
We’re totally the best team ever!!
Alou can’t get a day off, we are too busy to play. Running Dusty’s errands n shit.
Jesus Christ, how can we not have a run off this guy? Seems like a lot of deep fly outs today, is the wind blowing in?
Maybe I might be able to play a little center field?
I’ve played a little center field before.
CT, my son, I hath touched the arm of Josh Fogg and he is good. This is the word of the Lord.
Corey will play center, but maybe I’ll use you in 2nd tomorrow, Jose.
You call?![]("http://www.aciprensa.com/Banco/images/jesus-pastor.jpg"/)
I sure know how to party
We are continuing our season-long sucking ass after a day off thing, huh?
Chip referred to it as a "high fly ball to shallow left"
JACKASS! It was about 10 feet in front of Aramis’ near-miss.
JACKASS!!
I own all Cubs
Fuck You!
If any exists in this world, it will make itself apparent in the bottom of the 5th.
Someone way I was worse than Korey?
Should Mackowiak be my first hit batter of the year?
Yes I think I should
I’m hurt! It’s Bako New Year!
Hey Corey Feldman, put the crack pipe down and pay attention.
You see that slap hit by Tyke? THAT’S how you put the ball in play. Doesn’t have to be a poster shot, playboy.
There I go again.
Playboy?
It’s only Gail Fisher, for #106’s sake!
HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAY!!
By the way, if Barret hustles that out all day, w/o the stopping/starting that can aggravate a muscle, he wouldn’t have been hurt.
Yes, even the fair-haired child Michale Barrte was loafing.
Should I "hammer" the ball Chippy-style 200 feet again?
Should I get ready to pinch-hit, coach?
Did you pick up my dry-cleaning, Dubois?
Nice job, Rey! Just they way I’d do it.
Miss me?
No, but they might miss ME. Terrifying, isn’t it?
What have I done since coming here?
Rey: 1-13…one useless hit vs. Fat Roger.
Why is Rey Ordonez on my television?
Rey vs Ramon is like saying you want to be stabbed in the eye with a blue pen instead of a black one.
How in the world do I have trouble with Rey Ordonez, of all hitters?
Eat that Korey.
Hey #106, as long as we’re on speaking terms again, how about healing up Sosa, Wood, Gruddy, and Prior (just to make sure)?
Doing great guys keep it. Remember what I said about making those all important outs..The faster you get out the faster you can sit on your ASS.
I just came
Ron Santo has said this a million times this year.
CT:
Sorry. I’m busy in Vermont right now.
How about me?
I’m not God but I played him on TV.
Jesus, well, what’s your Dad doing?
Fuck you, you fucking cunt, Alanis. It was a fucking movie! Get you shit stained brains back on your fucking head!
Kev
P.S. Like my writing style?
Tyke Redman is the black Jim Edmonds.
I can see my house from up here.
CT:
My dad’s working on a dirt mound at 3615 N. Kenmore, Chicago.
Look at me, I’m Joan of Arcadia.
Come back, Rey. There will always be a place for you here.
Can’t hit, can’t field, what’s the point of me again?
Why is someone with an empty tank (like Prior is right now) also called "Gassed"?
Jumbo shrimp?
LIES!! Don’t listen, Rey. That’s what Iowa told me, too…then they traded me for Gookie!
I lay down a nice bunt. Oh. Never mind.
You guys get it yet? You need me more than Mark.
So we’ll go from Prior to…
…Mercker?
…Beltran?
Really?
6IP, 0ER, 2H, 0BB 8K?
This guy Mark Prior is pretty good.
Cubs Offense
Everyone listening? This is why Korey sucks.
Mock SO! WAY TO GO!!!!!!!!!!
NO WAY!
Dear Derrek Lee,
SWING THE GODDAMN BAT!
I know lots of us get on Sammy for terrible at-bats he has from time to time, the lack of range he has in right, and the general inability he has to hit cutoff men on throws, but we see what this offense is without him: TERRIBLE.
With him, it’s only mediocre. But it’s better than this crap we are seeing now.
Is Korey reading the Dose?
Bat Scared Of Ball
I just said Thomas Jones is going to be a 1,000-yard rusher.
Of course, it will take about 4 years for him to get there…
I knew we should have gotten a live chicken…
Pedro. I have some extra hats. For your bats, perhaps?
Who said I can’t hit a fastball?
I can’t hit anymore, but I’ve got wheeeeeels!
It was a curveball JC. No go see if you can straigten out the Pope.
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/news/a/2004/06/04/international1058EDT0538.DTL&type=printable
Hmmm……
I took 4 pitches and I’m on second! Cool!
Fuck this. No one’s gonna pay me $15mm times 7 years for this!
Shit!
Another baserunning fuck up!
EEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
I got out of it!
Any chance? Any chance at all?
Thank God we have one out already
There’s actually ONE out.
So, yes, this means we will score 12 runs this inning.
That was so intentional
No mercy for these Cubs. I know what happens with the bases loaded…
If Korey were batting seventh, he’d be up now. Dusty knows what he’s doing.
D’oh!
Screw it!
The call to the gate….
Cubs 0 for 9, 0 for 4 with 2 outs
Oops
Make that 0 for 10, 0 for 5
Good stat?
That the cubs havent scored with the bases loaded?
We are contagious
I came back to THIS?
I missed you Kent.
Cubs with the bases loaded this homestand
Ha, Mercker sucks. Big time.
And they thought Kent was an upgrade…hahaha.
Oh hell, he is still is.
Well, you can’t win ’em all.
Especially against the Pirates.
I love the Cubs
Hey, let’s piss away Prior’s first day back
Sausage king of Chicago
this will be a slow death in losing this game. the bullpen will blow it. prior comes back and of course we greet him with no runs. you got to be kidding.
Abe’s last name is Froeman. I doub’t he was Jewish.
Sorry…I’m the Sausage King of Chicago.
Any spots open on Celebrity Poker Showdown?
Please score on me, I’m terrible. You guys are ridiculous.
Am I still alive??
Rey owns 40% of my stock.
why do we try this, it never fucking works.
Well I can’t bunt either.
I will be dead by June 15
Should’ve had Greggie pinch-hit
http://www.abevigoda.com/
Now I know why I don’t play.
Hey, that’s a new one!
Remember me? I’m the last time the "Randall Simon, Sausage King" jokes were funny.
I know I sure do.
I remember last season when my team had an offense…good times.
i can’t bear to watch this. the pirates, and we can’t score a run against them. does anybody know how to produce a run.
About the last time when Sammy cork jokes were funny. Wait, those were never funny…but I thought they were!
Was that about the same time as me?
Misery…if the Cubs can’t get one of these lately…they don’t score.
I wonder if I’ll get a shot in the 9th?
I’m the closer dammit!
Will the Cubs win a game during me? Outlook not good.
No Troy you will not. Joe has been lights out against these Bucs.
No, we’d like to hit against Joe Bo, please.
Who will I make look like a bitch today?
How about the Cubs get a lead before Joe and LaTroy fight over who gets to protect it?
I don’t give a damn if Hawkins had an 8 pitch inning! Borowski’s my man!
Mackowiak, we don’t need you look bad. We do that ourselves.
Would it be so wrong to get a win here for LaTroy?
Would it?
CT,
You got any better ideas?
What is this? A conspiracy?
Somebody wake me up in the dugout, it’s my turn to hit!
time for us to shut up the boobirds out there.
Better ideas than getting a lead, Dusty? No.
Don’t worry, I’m on deck
All the teams the Cubs play should just let them load the bases every couple innings for shits and giggles and to drive their fans insane.
Not the vaunted Pirates bullpen!
We’re up.
The Cubs didn’t score on me! They deserve to be flogged.
it’s June and you’re still stinking it up
Hey, man, I had a single in the 1st inning, my BA won’t plummet.
It took me 8 pitches to get through the 8th.
Why waste another pitcher in a scoreless game?
you just suck
Not so fast, my friend!
I can handle LF next year too, so sit down and shut up, Kelton, Dubois, Pie, et al
Hey Moises, I thought the same thing in ’98…Unfortunately, so did management.
am i the only one that does anything around here?
Tell us something we don’t know
Ahem.
Nothing like having a guy warm up in the pen to possibly enter in the 9th with a 7.40 ERA.
We HAVE been sitting down and shutting up on the bench, gramps.
Did someone mention us?
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0603041scores1.html
Oh, and it’s June 4.
And, he’s been with the team the entire year.
leave hollandsworth in to hit. don’t even think about using macias here.
I am 6-6 my last 6 at-bats, can I hit?
How about that. They do happen.
i’m the new centerfielder when sosa comes back.
There’s my one miracle for the day
Borowski saving it.
Send out Joe Bo, I need to tie the game
look into the centerfield mirror when sosa is back, and you should see hollandsworth playing there.
Excuse me, Dusty? I have some experience at closer.
I am going to die of a heart attack on the mound. Perhaps not today, but it’ll happen eventually.
BUT HE LIES!
"ANOTHER big two-out for the Cubs!!" Chip bellowed on Hollandsworth’s single.
ANOTHER two-out hit?!?! Chippy, I understand that the Cubs had mucho big hits w/ 2 outs beack in April and May, but the recent story–in case your stupid fanboy robot date switch has been stuck on May 11th–has been that the Cubs have been doing exactly NOTHING in that situation, save for Barret’s granny a week ago.
You lousy propogandist.
In APRIL
isn’t that funny? pirites need an out so why don’t we load the bases.
Come on, I am 0-1, 22.09 era in 4 games vs Pittsburgh this season, what else can go wrong?
The bases are loaded? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
How do I stop myself from kicking him?
I have a hundge this kid (Joe Bo)is due.
Ron Santo, you moran, you fucked up the webpage
i suck worse then ramon.
6-12 career vs JoBo, nice dusty
Rey watch Bako and learn.
When we’re 7 games out of 1st place, the only teams we wanna play are the Cubs!
i don’t know who will be sweaty more here- Joe or Cubs fans.
What’d I miss? Other than some guy putting about 1,000 o’s into nooooo…
hello joe
If I pass out right now, Dusty would let me leave the game, right?
How do you like my haircut? Somehow I look even pudgier!
I’m an old bastard, but I just saved Joe’s ass.
I got your back, Joe.
And I think you’ll find it warm and refreshing!
That is what’s going to happen
i am god!
I’m only going to hold you together so long Moises. Don’t push it.
I’m sure Joe’ll have everything covered. I’m beat from those 8 pitches I threw.
Oops
Congratulations, Moises, you’ve made my Christmas card list. I love you.
Felix Navidad, hermano.
I saved this friggin’ game twice! How come there’s no stat for that?
Screw you, Jerome Holtzman, you old bitch!
I told you that i could blow this!
Who’s this Felix guy?
Expect this next to JoeBo’s name in the boxscore.
Just hit the ball to me!
Two out.
I need to be shot.
They’ve hit nothing but ropes off of me.
This is no way to win a pennant.
Get me up and throwing.
Well, that helps my fantasy team but it’s really an unsatisfying feeling.
Alou gets him with a reasonable throw.
But, nice catch earlier.
The better question is WHY THE HELL IS JOE BOROWSKI STILL THE CLOSER!!!??!!?!??!
When’s the flight to Mexico City?
I think the fans have a new nickname for me, too!
If I was a horse, they’d shoot me.
Nice catch, but if God were truly on this team, I’d think they could score more than 1 run against Josh freaking Fogg.
Unbefuckinglievable! why am i not surprised.
Hmmm. Might be time to reunite Everyday Eddie with LaTroy.
Hey, Ron Santo, where’d your excessive OOOOOOOO’s go?
Whelp, I’m a failure. Thanks Joe.
Nice.
I hate this fucking team.
Thanks, Offense and Joe
HAMMERED!
And then, depresion set in
I’m up in the pen according to Chip.
That means I Command respect by virtue of age, dignity, character, or position.
Ron dropped dead. Just like our bullpen.
It’s possible that we just might be the most disappointing team ever.
i continue to go against the grain using JoeBlow instead of Hawkins as a closer. i still stick with patterson. i continue to have a shitty shortstop that doesn’t hit. why do we lose games like this?
I will be the last out of the game I bet
Screw this! I’m going "walk off!"
I’ve thrown 13 pitches total in my last two games. I’m so glad Dusty still only uses me one inning at a time. Seems brilliant.
Yes, Macias?
I forgot it was 2-1. I just settled for a double.
$50 says I play center tomorrow.
Won’t somebody please mop my brow? With a loaded glock?
Just walk Walker and Lee. Bases loaded, nobody out? The Cubs have no answer for that.
Six times in the last five games.
I’m kind of dumb, huh?
Dumbass.
How can I screw this up?
Popup or K would do.
Derrek takes pitches he should hit.
Corey swings at ones he should take.
What a pair.
I am the nightmare that will haunt you all, forever and ever!
Thanks 316.
"It’s up to Corey Patterson." That’s not something you want to see every day.
is Korey thinking base-hit, or homer?
Brilliant lineup today for Dusty.
If he used his "good" one we’d have had Barrett and Alou up with a runner at third and one out.
Instead we get the Boo boys.
Corey, Derek, JoBo, HE GONE!
How loud will we boo if he doesn’t get the job done?
I think Patterson should bunt.
Nice idea.
Don’t blink! You’ll miss my AB and umpteenth consecutive failure to drive in runs in a key situation!
two run dinger by korey.
it has to happen.
Here I come!
Spell my name right it is COREY
Why do they keep loading the bases? It’s like they’re making fun of us and our superb ability to not score runs!
When Korey learns his strike zone, we’ll spell his name correctly.
Anything is better than Donald, I don’t mind!
Today was a testament to Dusty’s stubborn nature.
– Inexplicably moving his two worst hitters up in the lineup.
– Using Hawkins for one inning and one inning only.
– Shoving Joe back out for another save chance.
– Bunting Macias to third and giving Walker up when he was the best chance the Cubs had to actually score Macias. He’s already in scoring position at second.
Things can’t get much worse.
Can they?
From now on, he’s considered Donald, because I don’t like the way Korey is playing.
how long will we suck. lee-can’t even hit it out of the infield. patterson-can’t believe i didn’t K.
I don’t look so bad compared to these losers, do I?
The worst loss of the season.
"Joe is still my closer, 2 blown saves ain’t so bad!"
Hey guys, it’s me again to pour salt in your wounds. You may remember me from such classic posts as "Cub fans, don’t get your hopes up" and "Only morons put their faith in the Cubs."
Now, put on that blindfolk and start trying to wack me with a stick….
Go Sox! No, not out of town — to the AL Central title!
Hey, Andy, why would I want to use Walker to score Macias when I had Lee and Patterson coming up? That would make me sane or something.
Yeah…go Sox…
…wait…hold on….I gotta change the rear tire of my double-wide…it’s getting a little flat……..
Yes once again folks, when it comes to prickly crabbiness and inability to be funny, you just can’t beat the Cubbie faithful!
Now, back to Roscoe’s to enjoy some Long Islands with that Cubbie lineup. Good thing they’re all bottoms, since lord knows they can’t get it up….
We gone!!!!
Frankly, I’m stunned WGN stuck with the press conference long enough to hear about the "incident".
Leave it to them to cut it off right where it for interesting.
i agree with you on Dusty’s stubborness. he will have to stop going against the grain and playing guys that will get the job done. not by how much abiility they should have, not by how many millions we are paying them, not by what they did in the past, but what they can do no which is get the job fucking done.
This is the downside to having a "player’s manager" running a team. To avoid eroding the confidence of a handful of guys, Dusty’s ended up sacrificing the confidence of the team as a whole.
Time to run Dusty out of town. He’s a moron. Another loss that can be attributed to his mental incompetency.
1. Batting Lee and Patterson back to back in the order, and at the top of the order no less.
2. Batting Rey Ordonez with the bases loaded, and Jason Dubois on the bench? In a one-run game? What, Gabor Bako wasn’t available?
3. Taking down Hawkins after EIGHT pitches for Borowski?
4. Letting Borowski within 100 miles of a close game?
5. Bunting Walker with a man in scoring position and no one out? With two DEEP slumping hitters up next?
He’s a moron, the Giants fans were right.
When the tires on your home are better than the ones on your car, yuo just might be a Sux fan
I agree w/ Dusty not being a great coach on the field, I think we have all known that.
As for Borowski, same can be said. It was just a matter of time before he started blowing saves. Not like that 7+ ERA was a stat mistake all year. It means what it means.
Patterson and Lee- Lee has at least been there defensively. Patterson is just brutal. The guy would have a better chance to just try to bunt for a hit everytime. It works for Sanchez on the Tigers.
This team may be the most underachieving piece of crap in the history of humanity. Or something.
Brutal managing + brutal situational hitting = Brutal losses.
My cock is sore & bleeding from jacking it off non-stop for the last two hours since my last post.
I’ve been fantasizing about Ken Harrelson sucking me.
Dusty didn’t have Borowski finish up on Saturday. Beltran did.
Hopefully, this means Dusty is finally accepting reality…