Although I?ve rarely been accused of being ?too nice,? a part of me does feels a little guilty for what I?m about to do. It is not my intent to drive anyone to tears, let alone a change of majors. But this day is past due, and there is absolutely no reason to believe that the situation will correct itself without intervention. Constructive intervention, mind you. Well, mostly constructive anyway.

I have my doubts as to how well this particular approach will be received, but I felt the only way to address the matter was to return to the beginning, and mostly use BC?s own words (italicized below) as proof of his decreasing poor judgment.

It?s easy to forget that there was a time when BC was actually tolerable. I don?t know that he was a breath of fresh air necessarily, but he was much more digestible than the thin-skinned and oppressive overlord we currently have on our hands. In some ways, BC?s not unlike St. Louis? Rick Ankiel, a young guy with upside that realized early success, only to have found himself suddenly unable to throw strikes or get outs except by accident. Like Ankiel, BC will require continued patience and support, if he is ever to find his way back. I think I speak on behalf of most of you when I say your expectations are something short of greatness, and something more than infuriating, indecisive drivel. Let?s cross our fingers and hope to split the difference?

January 13, 2004
Quin Snyder plain sucks.

Maybe a tad harsh, but you have to admire the kid?s moxie right off the bat. It doesn?t hurt that he is absolutely right, some people—-including a few Duke University alums—-do in fact suck.

January 23, 2004
Because I’m trying to make these columns as enjoyable and reader-friendly as possible.

Excellent mission statement. Bravo, young chap!

February 4, 2004
Is USC head football coach Pete Carroll high or just hungover in this picture? I will leave that up to you?

Was he high, or was he hungover? We?ll probably never know for sure. But making a nearly impossible-to-prove-claim regarding someone?s state of sobriety, is always good for a few laughs. Well played!

February 12, 2004
(BC?s first critic reveals himself — shockingly it?s ET Murray, who hates most everything)

E.T., if you don’t like something in particular, you can always use the discussion to tell me what you don’t like, or you can even use the link at the top of all my articles to e-mail me with particular concerns?If you don’t like what I’m writing, you should tell me what you think is wrong. Otherwise, don’t ruin the enjoyment of others possibly enjoying the articles.

Personally, I?d have left out the last line. The ?enjoyment of others possibly enjoying? seems a bit redundant, and terribly assuming. Though this over-stated writing style quickly becomes BC?s trademark.

February 24, 2004
Stuart Scott is a no-talent, hood-acting hack?Illinois travels to Purgatory, err, Iowa.

BC receives 3 comments—all belonging to himself. He forgot lazy-eyed, but it?s a safe bet BC only resorted to name-calling after he?d first emailed Mr. Scott with his particular concerns. Boo-yah!

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Someone that isn?t a hood hood-acting hack—One Tree Hill?s Sophia Bush. Too bad the show?s writers may have her character get prenant this season. What are they thinking?

February 25, 2004
(BC hears from another critic — Mr. Obvious)

Again, if you have specific positives or negatives about my columns, I would like to know about them, and you can make a comment on here or e-mail me. Don’t send any attachments through my e-mail however, they don’t open through that address anymore.

Specific positives or specific negatives—share in the comments or through e-mail, I think we got it.

March 5, 2004
Washington State’s players must be feeling badly this morning. Not only because they have to go to school at Washington State (Which is probably enough to make most people suicidal anyway).

BC posts 3 of the first 5 comments. He does not indicate if he shared his specific concerns with Washington State administration and faculty before publicly labeling the school a deathtrap.

March 9, 2004
Gonzaga has the best college guard you have never heard of (Unless you have heard of him, which if that?s the case I?m screwed in this saying), in Blake Stepp.

The entire Desipio readership, including me, let?s this statement pass. Karry Ling admits to this day of still never having heard of Mr. Stepp.

March 15, 2004
Mississippi State will go to the National Championship Game, only to lose to Oklahoma State. It will be a great game, but unfortunately will be a sideshow to the attention the Baylor transfers on both teams (Roberts and Oklahoma State?s John Lucas) will get, back in Texas, for the murder of a teammate that destroyed much of the innocence of college basketball.

The entire Desipio readership lets the Mississippi State prediction pass, and the notion that college basketball was innocent until the Summer of 2003.

March 23, 2004
(BC takes grief from multiple angles for titling Duke/Illinois ?04 ?Biggest Game Ever?? only to declare it the second biggest game four paragraphs in. He also refers to Duke as the ?Evil Empire,? a tired and unoriginal attempt at name-calling. The honeymoon is all but over….)

If you want to read 20-year old or so writers that suck and aren’t trying to put themselves in a position to improve themselves (Only in my opinion of course), then go read the Daily Illini. If not, then you can read me. It may not be great, but I think I’m giving Desipio good thoughts and good issues to think about.

So, student writers at the Daily Illini suck, and they are not concerned with sucking less (in BC?s opinion)—got it. Surely this means the editors and staff of the Daily Illini were contacted personally, and informed by BC of specifically how and specifically why they suck.

March 28, 2004
If God has any mercy on my soul, Mike Hall will not be on my television for the next year. The rest of the people also aren’t that good, but Hall is possibly the most smug TV personality I have ever seen.

Comic Book Guy calls this the ?Worst. Column. Ever.? And then takes a shot at me for good measure. Macho Man equates it to ?fanboy musings.? 1 hour and 27 minutes later, Comic Book Guy softens his stance declaring he knows that BC is capable of better. Not sure if every Dream Job contestant is offered a direct critique by BC for not being that good, or just Mr. Hall for being too smug.

April 7, 2004
After a brief six-paragraph post in which we learn Maddux is a first-ballot Hall-of-Famer, Roy Williams is overrated, Jim Calhoun, Tom Izzo and Jim Boehem are all underrated (both the UConn men?s and women?s teams won their respective national championships—in case you missed it) and Dusty Baker does some crazy stuff sometimes, Three Minutes of Your Life comments, and asks if anyone wants him back. Geesh quickly comes to BC?s defense invoking the ?take it easy on the kid? defense? I chime in with a lengthy point-by-point response concluded by, ?Nice to see a column without the ?I’m only 20 years old? reminder.?

April 14, 2004
I’m still going to be pessimistic a lot of the time, but I think it would add years to my life if I didn’t think so negatively 100 percent of the time. So, I’m trying to cut it down to maybe 90 through this first month.

BC posts the first 3 comments to his own article, and then follows up with post #5. 90% pessimistic, excellent world-view!

April 25, 2004
The Packers, well, they are the Packers. No matter how good they are I will still think they suck. Therefore, their draft sucked.
Historic day as BC goes on to set the groundrules for future criticism: Please, keep your comments to points made in the article or points made in previous articles. Comments outside those bounds aren’t necessary or appreciated and they definitely aren’t relevant?

Sadly, the system is doomed for failure as BC has seemingly appointed himself as the judge of relevancy, and the Desipio readership is not accustomed to following directions and now they?re unclear if ?sucked? is an acceptable term of displeasure.

May 8, 2004
I know many of you don?t like hearing about it, but?

In other words, remember when these columns were intended to be enjoyable and reader-friendly, yeah forget all that.

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I know many of you will like seeing the OC?s, Rachel Bilson—who will hopefully not get pregnant this season.

June 11, 2004
After the notorious, and seemingly misplaced/ill-conceived, Reagan quasi-eulogy, BC stands atop his soapbox labeled ?Nasty America??

The internet, like the media as a whole, should be a place for discussion and debate, not for petty personal battles. I think the internet should be a bastion of sanity for discussing issues, whether or not people agree?In the past couple months I have seen more nastiness on the internet than ever before?It seems like the media, including the internet, has now become a place where if you aren?t a member of the select few you can?t say anything. But if you are in the select few, you can say anything you want..I know I have been seen as a little overbearing in terms of answering criticism on this site concerning my articles. I will of course allow criticism of this and any future article, as long as it stays clean and is somewhat relevant to the article or a point made in it?What I am looking for is constructive criticism or constructive support, whichever you want to give to this or other articles I write.

Heil, Fuhrer!!! Constructive criticism or constructive support, there is no third option. Quin Snyder?s, the Packers? and Daily Illini? suckage, Stuart Scott?s lack of talent, and Mike Hall?s smugness are obviously neither petty nor personal critiques. Hmmmmm? Does this mean BC is in the select few that allows him to say whatever he wants, and that the rest of the Desipio readership can?t or shouldn?t say anything?

BC does admit to being a ?little overbearing? but he also offers no hope for change in this area. Not too surprisingly with the battle lines drawn, BC quickly finds himself on an island with attackers coming from all sides. Even those that once came to his defense, are now noticeably silent.

In Volume 2, BC gets ?superduperweak? and the readers reach their breaking point.