Only the Cubs could find a way to go into a doubleheader and split when the opposing pitchers are Carl Pavano and David Weathers, and manage to beat Pavano but not Weathers. Ahh, that’s just their charm, isn’t it?
You didn’t think this would be easy did you? What, you haven’t had cable for 22 years? These are the Cubs. They don’t do easy.
And yet, they’re not in a bad spot. It would have been great to have won both games yesterday, but the only disaster would have been to have lost both. Third place is not the place you want to be this time of year. The Cubs have 13 games now in thirteen days. Three with Pissburgh, three in the giant cesspool of Shea then home for four with the Reds and three with the highly overrated Braves.
I’m not buying these Braves this year. They just can’t pitch all that well. If the Cubs need to win two or all three in that series to end the season, I like the Cubs’ chances.
Anyway, the most encouraging thing from yesterday was of course the return to form of a budding Cubs legend. After some rough patches recently, he shook off his cloak of mediocrity and came through with a huge performance when the Cubs needed it most.
I’m talking, of course, about Jose Macias.
He was three for four in the opener and…
OK, fine, I was really talking about The Franchise, Mark Prior. Granted he had the advantage of an enormous strike zone (Jerry Crawford must have had a buffet to catch), but so did Carl Pavano and he didn’t pitch nearly as well as Prior did. He threw 129 pitches which means he’s just about ready to spend an October wearing out his Achilles’ and elbow again. I kid because I care.
The performance of Matt Clement was not so stellar. Granted, the Cubs only scored two runs in the nightcap, but Clement couldn’t even escape the third inning. Who knows what’s going on with him physically. He’s built like a twelve year old girl, and he could just be wearing out. Or it could be, as we suspect, that he’s kind of a pussy. Who knows? What we do know is that he’s just not throwing strikes anymore. And when Chris DeLuca figures out you’d be better off dumping Clement for the last two weeks and using Glendon Rusch…well, it has to be obvious.
The announced attendance at yesterday’s doubleheader was 37,412. Thirty-seven thousand? Judging by the shots of the stadium during the game, Pro Player Park must seat 240,000 people. It looked like an Atlanta Hawks game had broken out. At one point the umpire became confused and charged Paul LoDuca with strikes one and two because he heard his own echo.
I’ve got a million of ’em.
I’ll stop now.
The Cubs have won nine of their last 12 games and six of their last seven against losing teams. They’ll now play ten straight against losing teams. Sounds good to me.
—-
By the way, in the photo above, check out the hairline on Mark Grudzielanek. I’ve seen thicker coverage on a Chia Pet.
Chia Pet? There’s a good reference. I’ll now make a succession of jokes about the Clapper, parachute pants and the A-Team. It’s old school week at Desipio!
—-
The Bears got some bad news yesterday. A day after learning that Mike Brown had done what Prior, Nomar and Gruddy had only threatened to do—blowing out his Achilles—they also learned that Peanut Tillman could miss a month with an injury to his knee. You know how Terry Shea likes to say that his offense doesn’t need wide receivers to be effective? Maybe Ron Rivera’s defense can get by with defensive backs?
I actually enjoyed Dick Stockton and Moose Johnston’s call of Sunday’s game, though I like Tony Siragusa on The Sopranos better than on Fox, because HBO won’t let him speak. But the Moose had a postively Brian Baldinger-esque moment when they brought the cart out to drive Mike Brown off the field and he said. “Normally, when they bring out the cart, it’s not good.” Really? You mean not being able to leave the field under your own power is not a good thing? I’ll have to write that down. I’ll put it right here next to “Scoring fewer points than your opponent’s is bad.” I’m glad we got that straightened out.
Nothing’s more boring than somebody talking about their fantasy team, but you might enjoy this. You may remember that I slept through my draft and ESPN’s Otto Pilot picked my team for me. He gave me two stud tight ends, Kellen Winslow and Todd Heap. I was going to trade Heap for a wide receiver but didn’t. I was glad about that after I heard that Winslow broke his leg on the second to last play of the game against the Cowboys. Then, I saw that Heap hurt his knee and could miss a month. This is just proof, as always, that I’m a dope.
Even though I had a rooting interest (Don McNabb is my QB) I didn’t watch much of the Vikings-Eagles last night because the combination of Al Michaels and John Madden gives me hives. I’m serious. I had to switch from Madden to the ESPN NFL 2K series on PS2 because I was going broke buying calomine lotion.
Instead, I watched, thanks to TiVo, the History Channel’s special on the War of 1812. Other than the fact that the guy they paid to pretend he was James Madison looked like former Cubs catcher Tim Blackwell (without the porn mustache), the thing was pretty well done. I realized that I didn’t know that much about the war of 1812. So how about I go into a long, boring dissertation about how Dolley Madison saved the portrait of George Washington from the White House (I knew that), and some lady made the world’s largest flag for the defense of Fort McHenry, and that that was the flag that Francis Scott Key saw and then wrote The Star Spangled Banner about and how Dolley Madison loved to make little invidually wrapped cakes and snacks…no,wait, that wasn’t in the show. Never mind.
—-
The Cubs have a way of prolonging the inevitable, don’t they. Assuming the inevitable is good, of course.
Mark Prior says the Cubs could use a five-man rotation in the playoffs. It’d be nice if they’d use one now.
We scoffed when Jim Hendry picked up Neifi Perez and Ben Grieve. Who’s scoffing now?
The Bears are getting a little thin at defensive back. If you see Cameron Worrell and Todd Johnson on the field at the same time, cover your eyes. Not since the days of Terry Schmidt and Jon Magnum have people so pale tried to cover guys so fast.
Marcus Reese wants to bump one of the honkeys (Joe Odom) to the bench.
Jack McKeon muttering to himself and Rosey.
The Rob Goldman trial just won’t begin. Hey, if they wait long enough, the imaginary girl will be 18 and he gets off Scot free! Right?
Mariotti puts down the doughnut to proclaim that after one good game, Thomas Jones is the next Walter Payton. He’s not even Eddie Payton, yet.
Rap on Comcast SportsNet. For those of you who are jonesing for some Gail Fischer, she’ll be on October 1.
Apparently Nomar wasn’t a decoy when he appeared in the on deck circle at the end of game two. On Saturday night the TV cameras caught him coming up the tunnel in the ninth inning and putting two bats in the bat rack. He’d clearly been hitting in the cage and I wondered then if he was going to pinch hit.
Rest easy, the Sleeze left her Volvo unattended for a second to write this about how the Cubs will win the Wild Card and the World Series and the Super Bowl! Or something.
For whatever reason, most doubleheaders are split, but you can’t blame Dusty. He loaded up for game two and they just didn’t hit.
The Genius can’t even get a victory celebration right.
If it’s late September it’s time for another Ron Santo health scare! He talks with the Wizard of Roz.
If it’s Tuesday, it’s time for another of Peter King’s Monday Morning Quarterbacks. Huh?
Kelly Dwyer is handling all of the SI preseason previews for the NBA. See, they know talent when they see it. That’s why they won’t hire me to write anything. I’m not bitter. No, really. Did I mention that I once mailed a turd to Ted Turner? What, he doesn’t own them anymore? Damnit. Don’t tell anybody I did that. It’s just between you and me. But anyway, Kelly’s funny and these previews are very good. So enjoy.
X-tina says Britney’s wedding was “trashy and low rent.” Ooh, burn!
Jacko has photos of naked boys in his house. I’m sure there’s a logical explanation for this. Maybe John Wayne Gacy mailed them to him? Don’t judge!
Carmen Electra is going to be on TBS’ “The Real Gilligan Island.” Some people will do anything to get away from Dave Navarro, I guess. Navarro lost to SNL weenie Seth Meyers in the finals of the Celebrity Poker Showdown and you could tell that Meyer was afraid Dave was going to snap and kill him. That was good TV.
The world’s greatest newspaper says that Kim Jong Il has gone cannibal. They even have pictures to prove it.
Is that my balding head instead of Grudzie’s?
As a lifelong hockey fan and Supervisor of Off-Ice Officials for a minor league hockey team, I am volunteering to write the NHL Preview for Desipio.
I just get done laughing (nearly five days later) over the picture in my mind of Paul Bako entertaining George Ofman with an accordion, and now I have to think of ump charging a batter with two strikes because he hears an echo. Ah, it kills me.
By the way, when is Ron Santo gonna figure out that traveling with a major league baseball team for six months is gonna be hard on a healthy guy, let alone one who has had diabetes and heart complications? I swear, the minute I’m able to, I’m outta my job. Go home and worry over the Cubbies, Ronnie. It may not be any less stressful, but you won’t have to haul your ass to five cities in 13 days.
Kudos to Chris DeLuca for having the balls to write in his column what many of us have been saying: Clement is killing the Cubs down the stretch and he doesn’t have the mental make-up. It sure would’ve been nice to see a guy go out there in Game 2 and shove it up a tired club who was on the verge of elimination. Instead, Matty performs CPR on them by allowing Damion Freakin’ Easley to hit a 3-rum bomb off him. Rusch pitched well enough Sunday to earn himself a start this weekend against the Mets (probably Friday to give Prior the five days off after a 129-pitch outing).
Dave B nails it.
Clement ventilates the Marlins.
Barrett wakes up the Astros.
The whole bullpen tanks against the Cards back in June.
Maybe they can wake themselves up.
For what it’s worth, I think the split was no disaster but was a wasted opportunity. The Cubs could have burried the Fish (though the Fish are pretty much done anyway), taken the lead in the wildcard, kept the Astros two games behind in the L column, and dominated the last winning team they face before a 10 game stretch against the wretched refuse of the NL. It would have been a huge psychological lift to the team. And it was there for the taking with Weathers on the hill. One thing that annoys me about sabermetric geeks is their refusal to consider the possibility of momentum and chemistry. Down the stretch, good feelings can lift a team to victory. My feeling on yesterday’s game was after digging a 3-0 hole, Clement left the team struggling up hill on what should have been an enjoyable win. When Barrett got one back, Matt gave them two. It was a dreadful performance by Clement and one which will stick with me through the offseason if the Cubs don’t win the damn thing. That said, I think the Cubs can realistically go 9-4 down the stretch and win it.
"a wasted opportunity."
This team never wastes an opportunity to waste an opportunity.
Clement chokes again
Throwing fake chin hair away
Overpaid free agent
I think 91-71 will get us at least into a one-game playoff for the Wild Card.
The remaining schedules for SF and HOU lead me to believe they will end up with at least 70 losses. However, especially with Houston, it looks unlikely that these teams will have more than 72 losses when this season ends.
Therefore, 90-72 won’t get it done, while 92-70 would very likely get us in. 91-71 is the infamous middle ground in this race in my opinion.
So, I agree with #4, a 9-4 finish (Which would get us to 92-70) almost certainly would win it. If either San Francisco or Houston beats us if we do that… That would be typical for the Cubs, but also a performance that would be exceptional by one of those two teams. At least San Diego and Florida seem to be out of time, so it’s down to three instead of five.
Old school week at Desipio? That is so gnarly, dude!!!!! Count me in.
Quit stealing my bit of repeating every point multiple times, each time slightly contradicting the others.
Sincerely,
John Madden
Cubs Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 @ PIT 2 1
3 @NYM 2 1
4 @CIN 3 1
3 @ATL 2 1
TOTAL 9 4
FINAL 92 70
San Fran Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 HOU 2 1
3 LA 2 1
3 @ SD 1 2
3 @LA 2 1
TOTAL 7 5
FINAL 91 71
Houston Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 @SF 1 2
3 @MIL 2 1
3 STL 2 1
3 COL 3 0
TOTAL 8 4
FINAL 91 71
FLA Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 PHL 3 0
3 @ATL 3 0
3 @MTL 3 0
4 @PHL 3 1
TOTAL 12 1
FINAL 91 71
San Diego Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 LA 3 0
3 AZ 3 0
3 SF 2 1
3 @AZ 3 0
TOTAL 8 4
FINAL 91 71
Los Angeles Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 @SD 0 3
3 @SF 1 2
4 COL 2 2
3 SF 1 2
TOTAL 7 6
FINAL 90 72
Phila. Games Team Proj W Proj L
3 @FLA 0 3
3 MTL 3 0
3 PIT 3 0
4 FLA 1 3
TOTAL 7 6
FINAL 83 79
Stop complaining that you are tired you can thank your manager. McKeon has worn you guys out. At least Dusty gives guys some breathers during this stretch.
So much vitriol, so little time. I expect a full off-season Dose as a followup–
LF: Dave Kingman
CF: Brian McRae
RF: Candy Maldonado
3B: Ken Reitz
SS: Jeff Blauser
2B: Bump Wills
1B: Fred McStiff
C: Todd Hundley
SP: Steve Renko, Danny Jackson, Jaime Navarro, Mark Clark, Shawn Estes
RP: Felix Heredia, Bob Scanlan, Matt Karchner, Dave Smith, Mel Rojas
Mgr: Don Baylor
Discuss.
I think I deserve a slot on the squad.
I am shocked that Don Baylor got the nod over me, Jim Essian and Tom Trebelhorn! I thought I’d be skippering this club.
Also surprised you omitted Don Young, Steve Henderson, and Ed Lynch off this squad.
Hell, this team would have one hell of a deep bullpen, when you come to think of it.
I was hated pretty much.
I imagine I’d be on the coaching staff, along with Jeff Pentland, Dallas Green mole John Vukovich, Marty DeMerritt, and who else?
I tried to lift the Cubs to victory in Game 2 after the inspiring Game 1 win. I can’t believe that didn’t work. Damn you, sabermetric geeks!
Damn, you guys hated me? After all I did? Forget the terrific sound bite he caused and Brant Brown should be in my place.
I could start for that team. Of course, so could Jose Guzman, Ismael Valdez, or Frank Castillo.
And I’m surprised there’s no room for The Farns here.
You left me off the club? I will freaking kill you, I will rip out your children’s larynx and use them to re-string my guitar, I am Mothro-Julian, fear me!
I want on that F#$@@# staff, you c#$%#$suckers!
Whaaa, no love for me??
I suppose Vuk could be first-base coach, Kim the third-base coach, Jeff Pentland in charge of hitters, Marty DeMerritt imparting his wisdom on that pitching staff.
I do want to remind you that I was once the Cubs’ bullpen coach, so I’d be a natural there. Trebelhorn did a great job as bench coach under Jimmy Lefebvre (my replacement), so I guess he could take the job.
Seriously, how could I not be the manager of that team? Do you even remember my futility?
was that Clement left a big steamer on the good feelings of game 1. Why is it that (for stat only fans) baseball is the only sport in which intensity, teamwork, chemistry, and momentum have nothing to do with success? There’s no doubt in my mind that momentum is huge in football and basketball. Why not in baseball?
I suppose I could be the GM of this club. I’ll draft a list of petty clubhouse rules to keep those jamokes in check.
The preponderance of fine, scrappy ballplayers in that bunch compels me to desire announcing their games.
I like to be on the Most Heiti Cubs of All Times team.
Chip, could I do colored commentary with you? It was always a fantastical dream of mine.
I know Brenaman, Dave Nelson, Jim Frey, Milo Hamilton and Bob Brenly all want to crowd in on the radio side of things.
There is a difference between hated and futile player. You were hopeless, not hated. How about a futility team then, to go along with the All-Hate team?
LF-Gene Clines
CF-Doug Dascenzo
RF-Champ Summers
3B-Ken Reitz (again!)
SS-Dave Rosello, Augie Ojeda (tie)
2B-Vic Harris, Mike Tyson (tie)
1B-Pete LaCock
C-Barry Foote
P-Bill Bonham, Anthony Young, Geoff Zahn,
Mike Morgan, Frankie Castillo
Mgr-Don Baylor (again!)
Come on,
Fair is fair. Mike Morgan actually was the ace of the 1993 Cubs, which finished OVER .500. He also had a pretty good year in 1992 as No. 2 to Maddux.
I DID lead the Cubs into playoff contention one out of the 2 1/2 seasons I was there. Aren’t Jim Essian, Preston Gomez, Tom Trebelhorn and Charlie Grimm all worse than me?
F@#* you, Gene Clines up in that team.
what? no love for me?
Don, go fuck yourself! I managed the Cubs to 4 World Series!!! No we didn’t win, but that pretty much beats the hell out of your "we were in contention for 5 months during the 2.5 seasons I managed the team" arguement.
Can I be the 25th man?
No, sorry, Lenny. That spot’s mine.
And yeah, the guy posing as Don Baylor is a dope for suggesting Charlie Grimm.
#25
I think because baseball is such a slow game. The only people moving regularly is the person at bat and the pitcher/catcher. The rest of the batting team isn’t doing anything. The rest of the fielding team isn’t doing anything unless the ball is hit in their direction.
In basketball, everyone in the game is constantly moving. In football everyone moves every 20 seconds or so. The long delay in movement kills baseball momentum.
That’s ok, I’ll just play 3B and bat leadoff instead.
Hold on there, Lenny! Does it look like I’m managing this team?
I don’t know… I could maybe give Blauser a run for his money as most hated, especially because of that enormous E-6.
Can I be on the most hated Cub fan list?
Sorry, there’s little competition there.
Do you think I’m soiling my pants now that Scott Rolen has missed nine straight games, Steve Kline is out for the year, and Cris Carpenter is "60-40" for the post-season?
I’m still pulling for you, #43!
Hey, I’d make it on the most-hated team for both the Cubs AND the Sox!
I’m that kind of a guy.
Yes, the whole city of St. Looie is giddy over the acquittal of the 19-year old puck bunny who helped her boyfriend (and former Blues player) set up a hit on his agent. I’ve had to shoo her away from our clubhouse though, ever since I heard her and Matt Morris talking about knocking off DK’s wife’s new boyfriend.
I’ve heard two rumors here which I have never seen anywhere else:
1) Corey and Gail Fischer
and
2) Cindy Sandberg and the rest of the Cubs.
Where did these come from and what’s the full scoop on Cindy S.?
I think Lee Elia secured a spot as the All-Hated Cubs manager with that diatribe directed directly at the fans. Sure it’s hilarious, but I think he was bucking for this spot, so we need to give it to him.
But if there’s a team captain, it’s Todd Hundley, hands down.
I have left St. Louis for good this year. I hope they enjoy their three playoff games this fall. Then they’ll have plenty of time to watch the Rams go 5-11.
I am the only Cub in team history — and it’s lengthy — to be booed in the ON-DECK CIRCLE.
World’s greatest fans, my ass.
That’s about how many the Cardinals will play this year…fat lot of good those 100 wins will do you in October (see Mariners, Seattle).
My scoop is about a C-cup.
Which one of us will knock off the Cards?
The real news is that we’re going to have to play the Cubs at least six times in a row in October. Maybe eight. I hate the Cubs.
I’m so mad I’m going to punch my wife again.
Don’t worry, Bobby. We’ll keep it limited to six games.
Eh, more like a "B" Cindy
Remember when I flipped off the Wrigley fans while running the bases after a HR? Good times.
What is the deal with Cindy Sandberg? I can assume she got plugged by Davey Martinez and Rafael Palmiero, but it’s always seemed to be innuendo.
Clearly, when Ryno walked away in ’94, he was having some personal problems. I can only guess this was it.
As for Corey and Gail Fischer, I have no clue where this came from.
The assumed story is that Davey Martinez and Cindy Sandberg were involved while he was with the Cubs (coincidentally Ryno’s three "worst" statistical years). There is even one story that Ryno went to management with a "this club ain’t big enough for both of us" proposal and the little rat Martinez was dumped to Montreal for Mitch Webster.
Any idea what the Cubs will do about selling playoff tickets? I know that some season ticket holders were told they would not be getting tickets for all the games.
I have season tickets for weekend/night games. Unlike last year, in which we got our tickets for every home game, we got tickets for all Division series games, 2 of the 3 NLCS games and 2 of 3 World Series games. Explanation was that season ticket sales exceeded last years.
You know, I plugged Cindy too, pussy and blow, good times.
Hey, Andy, check with your lawyers…
Remember when I pitched for the Cubs, but wore a DK57 patch on my uniform and called the Cardinals clubhouse everyday to cry about my exile to Chicago? That was awesome.
Veres==Definite Most Hated Cub
The postseason is nearly here, Andy–where is all the St Louis hate? It is time to start calling out the Deadbirds, their urine-soaked stadium, their mullet-wearing, buck-toothed, trailer park fans, and their coke head seance sessions channeling Daryll F-ing Kile.
I hate the Cardinals. Hate hate hate. Did I mention hate?? If there is a God, we will get to meet them in the LCS, and end our penance by beating these pukes in 6 games, at The Urinal, to win the pennant.
Oh man, I would likely die the next day, and be a happy man. So would my dead grandpap and great-grandpap.
Hate hate hate. Kill kill kill.
Gail Fisher couldn’t hold a, uh…candle to my ballplayer wooing ability.
Saturday’s Tribune had an article in it about Carlos Zambrano standing in the Cubs’ dugout a few hours before his start waving his bat and yelling, “I want to kill a reporter.”
Yet another reason to love Carlos.
He then homered in the game.
I want to be remembered for something. If you can’t put me on the "Most Hated" or the "Most Futile" how about the "Best Perspirers"?
You think I got close to that crazy Venezuelan? No chance.
I’m in like a dirty shirt!
1 Corey Patterson
2 Neifi Perez
3 Aramis Ramirez
4 Moises Alou
5 Derrek Lee
6 Sammy Sosa
7 Todd Walker
8 Michael Barrett
9 Kerry Wood
Like, what, Todd?
Cal, I’d be happy to welcome you to that team.
Nomar who?
I could make the sweaty team, too!
Uh oh , the Clement virus has got to me! A leadoff walk to Kendall!
Make that 2 walks
Hey look 9-4-6 I’m out. I equal good hustler.
Hey guys we will be showing a meaningless White Sox – Twins match up tonight while the Cubs play a very important game on WCIU.
What a wonderful idea!!!!!!!
This just in:
Aramis Ramirez…
Yeah, he’s pretty good.
I’ll participate in the most hated Cubs lineup. These are the pricks that come to my mind off hand.
SS-Rey Ordonez or Alex Gonzolez
3B-Gary Scott or Kevin Orie
C-Todd Hundley or Paul Bako
SP-Lance Dickson, Mike Harkey, Danny Jackson, Matt Clement
Bullpen-Kyle Farnsworthless,Mel Rojas, Antonio Alfonseca, Flash Gordon
Pitch-hitters- Tom Goodwin or Lenny Harris
If I think of any more I’ll let you know.
Hold em down bullpen.
I guess asking for any more consistency out of our bullpen was too much for them to handle.
Well, at least Hawkins didn’t let the Pirates win it in the bottom of the 9th.
Guh. This team is frustrating at moments like this.
2-7 in 1 run saves. Yeesh.
looks like hawkins blew another one, when will dusty realize the latroy is not a closer, go houston!!
Who would you suggest Dusty use as a closer?
The Dumpster?
I did well.
latroy was awesome as a set up man, he sucks as a closer(as minnesota found out). anyone can suck as a closer, wertz had some saves down a AAA, put latroy back in the set up role.
But hey at least I didn’t check swing into a double play.
Also – I knew Mr. Torrres would pick me up with a wild pitch.
I’m in for the save.
Dusty should bring me in to face Redman.
Play matchups Dusty…
CUBS WIN!!!! HOLY COW!!!!
im going to bed
go houston!!
Cubs win 5-4!
Cubs back tied for first in the Wild Card race at the moment.
Hey no shit! Screw you, bee-ahch!
Finally the Cubs found a team that wants to lose worse than they do.
Why give up no runs when you can give up one and get the win?
We pulled another close one out. That raises our record to 9-6 in extra innings. I was wondering how many of those games we blew to get into extra innings? My guess would be about 11 of them.
Anyway, what an inning from Dempster. A guy that has Tommy John surgery at the beginning of the year finds himself in that tight of a situation and comes through. This guy needs to be in the closer role instead of Hawkins. He can strikeout more guys when he needs too. Don’t get me wrong, Hawkins is trying, but he’s a setup man. I’m sure Dusty will stick with Latroy though. It’s just too late to go with someone else.
Well I hope Carlos will be on tomorrow. Perez is no slouch. We need to maintain a sweep of the "Battling Buccos" as Gay Chip
would say.
GO CUBS!
Uh, I don’t want to lead the wild card race today, so why not let Bagwell and Fat Lance play home run derby today?
Listen, Cubs, here’s the deal: If you win the next four games, you will be 88-66 with me beckoning on Saturday night. Think of all the possibilities. Think of how crappy it’d be if Dusty puts an early curfew on the team if they’re sitting at 86-68 or 84-70….
Win the next 4 games and use me to get warmed up for your clinching celebration in Chicago the following week!
I homered in the first so the Dodgers lead 2-0.
THe Giants lead Houston 3-2.
Whoa…
We won a one-run game!
Where are all you f***ing critics now?
I think the Cubs and Giants will make the playoffs. Giants will win their division.
I’m back in the rotation everyone!!!
Girly Boy Clement is out.
http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/cubs/cs-040921cubsbrite,1,5258060.story?coll=cs-cubs-headlines
Desipio Scoreboard Update:
LA 4
SD 9
Bot 8th
HOU 2
SF 9
FINAL
Egads, I got fired!
From Monday’s DH gamecast:
Intrepid reader# 363: Baker Basher
I’m back from my Cincy trip. Yes, that’s right, I went to the only game the Cubs lost on Saturday night. I did try to heckle Farnsworthless down in the bullpen though. I yelled at Remlinger and the Meat Tray as to where the Farns was? I said that Kyle was worthless and they just gave me that deer in the headlights look.
Hmmm, deer in the headlights, plastic deer, I think Farns’ new nickname is Bambi…
Remember me, Cubs fans? Well, all summer I was busy threatening to shut down Wrigley Field for falling concrete. I was a real tough guy, wasn’t I?
Well, my plan was to close Wrigley down next week and make the Cubs close the regular season in Cincy and Atlanta has been shelved now that everyone found out that my building inspectors aren’t out of diapers yet.
I might be fired by Friday. Big break for the Cubs.
From Cubs.com:
"The Cubs were 7-2 heading into Tuesday’s game since adding a plastic deer target used by bow hunters to the team. The deer is dressed in a child-sized Kyle Farnsworth jersey, and usually has a bowl of food taped to its snout after games. Perhaps they’re ‘Lucky Charms?’"
I think whoever put it in a Farns jersey is my new favorite Cub.
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