There’s probably something sad in my hope today that Jim Hendry would wake up, see his shadow and decide to wait six weeks to sign Jeromy Burnitz, but alas, we had no such luck. And you can see how morose it’s made me, I just used the word “alas” in a sentence.
Sammy Sosa is in Baltimore today taking his physical, eating crabs and blowing TV kisses to us back in Chicago. He says that keeps us “at the bottom of my heart.” I guess it’s better than him saying he keeps us at the heart of his bottom.
I could go on for page after page about what a waste of time and money I think Jeromy Burnitz is, but apparently the Cubs have come to a two year agreement with Jeromy. I was hoping the agreement would be that Jeromy would play for anybody but the Cubs for two years and then retire, but no such luck. Burnitz will get more than $4 million in 2005 and there’s a mutual option (meaning, he’s out on his ass) for 2006.
Did you know there are actually Cubs fans, or at least people who claim to be Cubs fans who are hoping that Sammy fails his physical so that he can come back. Does anybody really think that’s a good idea? Does anybody think there’s a snowball’s chance in Hell that in the event of that natural disaster that baseball armageddon wouldn’t befall Mesa?
I could sit here and I could spin the Burnitz signing positively. In fact, I’m going to make a half-assed attempt to do that right now.
Half-assed attempt at placating your fears about Jeromy Burnitz
Let’s take a look at some of Jeromy’s pluses:
– Has never been convicted of a felony, that we know of.
– In 1999 he hit 33 homers, drove in 103 runs and posted a .402 on base average for the Brewers.
– Walked at least 70 times in a season every year from 1997 to 2001
– Rebounded from a lousy 2002 to hit .274 with 18 homers and 45 RBI in only 65 games with the Mets in 2003.
– Did hit .283 with 37 homers and 110 RBI for Colorado last year.
Everybody will jump on Burnitz’s home and road splits with the Rockies which were:
Home: .322 avg, .386 on base, .670 slg., 24 HR and 68 RBI
Road: .244, .327, .448, 13 HR, 42 RBI
I won’t get into the whole thing about how Rockies players traditionally (even Todd Helton) have worse than normal road splits because they get used to hitting in zero gravity and then have an absurdly hard time adjusting for road games. I just won’t. But check out these home and road splits:
Home: .339, .405, .714, 29 HR, 67 RBI
Road: .247, .316, .400, 10, 39
Those road numbers are horrendous. How can you slug .314 worse on the road?
So who was that guy?
.
Yeah, Moises.
Burnitz has traditionally hit better in day games. That’s a plus. He’s an above average right fielder with a great arm. That’s nice.
OK, now to the negatives.
– He’s white and as Dusty has taught us, those guys struggle with all the day games.
– He strikes out with nearly the same frequency Sammy does. Although last year in more games than Sammy he struck out less.
– He’s old. He’ll be 36 on tax day. Then again, Sammy’s already 36 and he’s a Dominican 36 which is anywhere between 40 and dead.
– You know how he had that good first half with the Mets in 2003? Yeah, then he got traded to the Dodgers and hit .204 with a .252 on base average in 61 games. That’s not so good.
Here’s Jeromy’s ESPN.com Scouting report.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/scouting?statsId=5061
2004 Season
Jeromy Burnitz was able to re-establish himself as a run-producing power hitter in 2004, while adding the dimension of hitting for average. Burnitz hit a career-best .283 despite his eighth 100-plus strikeout season. He also reached the 30-homer plateau for the sixth time in seven years and returned to the 100-RBI level for the first time in three years. Burnitz did enjoy the benefits of Coors Field, but most of all he showed consistency, particularly in terms of run production.
Consistent? That’s good. However, a guy can be consistently bad, too (i.e. Alex Gonzalez), which is not so good.
Hitting
There’s a reason Burnitz strikes out in triple figures. He lets it all go when he swings and doesn’t make adjustments in a two-strike situation. Burnitz tends to experiment too much and gets out of sync, but in 2004, reunited with his original pro manager, Clint Hurdle, he was able to focus on a basic hitting approach, which paid off with rare consistency for him. He sits on a fastball early in the count, and can be fooled with offspeed pitches, particularly away because he’s trying to yank everything.
Re-read those first two sentences again. Sound familiar? Sound like a guy with a big boombox? Now read the last sentence. Yeah, sounds familiar, too. At least Jeromy will be doing it from the other batter’s box. In the world of the Cub, this is progress.
Baserunning & Defense
Burnitz has a step above average speed, but it’s not an asset. He plays the game out of control at times and doesn’t have the natural feel for stealing bases. He can take an extra base but will hustle himself into trouble. Burnitz split his time among all three outfield positions with Colorado last year, and actually played a stronger center field than any other. However, his size and all-out play wore him down in the final weeks of the season. He has the arm strength to play right field.
Dear lord, he’s Moises on the bases, only two steps faster. That just means the run downs will last longer. The first time Dusty plays him in center, Desipio will disappear because I will have shot myself.
2005 Outlook
The Rockies declined a $3 million mutual option to keep Burnitz in Colorado for the 2005 campaign. He reaffirmed the fact that he can play every day, and will get that opportunity. He is a first-rate clubhouse presence, who showed his unselfishness with the Rockies by never complaining about being moved around in the field.
The Rockies declined a mutual option? Just like the one he’s getting from the Cubs. Oh, well, at least it’s a one year deal. I’m glad he’s a first-rate clubhouse presence. That’s two rates higher than Sammy.
I worked with a gal named Bridget McManamon. She worked in the records room with me. I asked her for the Beatles White album as well as a glass of hot fat and the head of Alfredo Garcia.
Another positive about Burnitz is he usually hits the cut off man, which will be new to Cub fans.
Oh shit…now I have to pay attention to balls hit in the outfield!!! That’ll be new to me, as well…
National Signing Day and I’m in Jacksonville.
But I’ve been flying back and forth between South Bend and Jacksonville.
I’m huge and so undisciplined that the only way I was able to lose weight was to get my stomach stapled.
All of this work, all of this travel. Who’s got me for the Dead Pool this year?
Throughout the whole offseason, my attitude was patience, patience, patience. They know what they’re doing. Well, patience got us Jerry Hairston Jr. and his banjo bat and a guy who could give us a .220/.310/.390 line (see Burnitz, 2002) as the Cubs corner-outfielders. I feel pretty stupid right about now.
By the way, for those who think Hairston’s an OBP machine, check out his OBP in the two seasons in which he was an everyday player (.310 and .329). Add in the fact that the guy hasn’t slugged about .400 in the last five years. Don’t tell me that the Sosa trade was anything but a dump of a bad attitude. That’s its sole merit.
“Oh shit…now I have to pay attention to balls hit in the outfield!!! ”
Todd, with you playing 2nd, every ball hit to the right side has the potential to go into the outfield. HAHA!
Ship Hairston and the prospects to Oakland for Eric Byrnes (c’mon, Billy Beane can’t be serious about playing Keith Ginter). Then we can take bets on how far into the season it will be that Byrnes and Bunitz will crash into each other and end both their seasons.
Your outfield’s gonna be Hollandsworth-Patterson-Burnitz. Well, until Todd gets hurt, and that’s not scheduled until late May this year.
Sign Maggs.
And if Charlie Weis isn’t taken in the Dead Pool, I’ll grab him. On top of everything else, he looks like he smokes a pack a day. Maybe he does smoke. Maybe he’ll light up in the fourth quarter against USC.
Aieeeee! My shadow! Jim, put me back in the hole!
Hey guys, Got some bad news. I got booted off my team today. Anybody need a shooting guard? If you do, call me the Dallas County jail in Wes Des Moines. Visisting hours are 9-5
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