Tonight, President Bush is going to give a live TV address to the nation. The pundits (good word, pundits) say he’s going to reassure the nation that the Iraq War is going well. I have it on authority that’s not the theme of his speech. Rather, he’s going to try something even more impossible than that. He’s going to reassure Baltimore Orioles fans that they haven’t already seen the best of the Sammy Sosa Era.
It was with much disappointment that the Cubs felt the need to dump Sosa and a huge bag of cash on the Orioles in exchange for a worthless, allegedly speedy utility man, a minor league infielder and a pitcher who retired upon hearing the news of his impending Cubdom. The disappointment wasn’t that Sammy Sosa was leaving, but that it had even come to this at all.
And now, not even halfway through the season, ask yourself a question. How many times have you missed him this year? Most Cubs fans can go entire games without even thinking of Sammy. When a guy can be more than adequately replaced by Jeromy Burnitz, the only way it can be viewed as a positive is if Jeromy is standing in for him in a “bald, bug eyed freaks” contest.
But that’s what’s happened to Sammy. Jeromy Burnitz, not even having his best season, has been a more than adequate replacement.
That says more about Sammy’s decline than anything.
The last time he even looked like the Sammy Sosa the Orioles foolishly thought they were getting was way back on April 24 in Toronto. He hit two homers in a 7-1 win over the Blue Jays and finished the day with a batting average of .299, an on base average of .341 and a slugging percentage of .532. The Orioles won 7-1 and were cruising along in first place.
It hasn’t been an easy season for him. He got a staph infection in his foot in May and since coming off the DL he’s been lousy. How lousy? He looks like he did in the second half of last year. Yeah, that lousy.
He’s hitting .239 with nine homers and 25 RBI. He’s struck out 45 times in 59 games (which seems low, actually, for him) and is sporting a horrendous .310 on base average and anemic .414 slugging percentage.
Other than a pinch hitting appearance, he’s batted fourth or fifth all year long. Sound familiar?
The Orioles have lost six in a row to drop out of first place and during that stretch Sammy’s 2-23 with 0 RBI and two singles.
He’s also still Sammy in the field. He covers as much ground as most right fielders, even at his advanced age, but his throwing arm is still hilarious and he wouldn’t know a cut off man from a parking lot attendant.
The Orioles were at one time open to talking to him about a contract extension after the season, but that ship has sailed. Sammy’s about to start the nomad period of his career where he shifts Jose Canseco-like from team to team year to year. It’s sad. It really is. But it’s not like we didn’t all see it coming.
As for Burnitz, if you took an objective look, he’s probably what, the 12th best right fielder in baseball? He’s basically a clone of his old Brewers’ teammate Geoff Jenkins, though he’s having a better year.
It’s not like he’s having a monster year. He’s hitting .275 with a modest .475 slugging percentage and his on base average isn’t lighting it up at .330. But he’s slid comfortably into the fourth spot in the order between the ludicrously hot Derrek Lee and E-ramis Ramirez. On defense he catches flyballs, makes throws low enough to be cut off and acurate enough to let through and has above average range.
Three years ago it would have been folly to have thought that nearly halfway through a season you’d be happy to have a rightfielder hitting .275 with 12 homers and 42 RBI. Sammy could do that in a month when he got hot. But that’s exactly what the Cubs are right now. They’re happy.
Can you imagine the daily circus if Sammy had come back? Even if the Cubs were 38-36 like they are right now Sammy would be getting the blame. From the day his corked bat blew up against Tampa, you knew his time in Chicago wouldn’t end happily. But you kind of thought he could make it more than three months in Baltimore, didn’t you?
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Carlos Zambrano faces the Brewers again tonight. A week ago he imploded against them, giving up eight runs in the second inning. Carlos thinks his problem is that when he gets in a jam he tries to overthrow. We all saw evidence of that in his Yankee Stadium start when with two outs and A-Rod up with a guy on second, Carlos got ahead of A-Rod on breaking stuff and then kept shaking Henry off when Henry wanted another offspeed pitch. Carlos shook and shook and shook until Henry relented, then A-Rod lined a single into center to chase Carlos and start the Will Ohman-Mike Wuertz fireworks factory.
If Carlos is healthy (and hopefully his aching toe has healed up) he’ll get things turned around. But another bad outing and you have to wonder if he’s healthy. Oh, the fun with the Cubs pitchers never ends, does it?
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The NBA Draft is tonight and the Bulls have no picks for the first time in the 40 year history of the franchise. Oh, how we yearn for the glory years of picking guys like Mark Randall and Byron Houston. Those were the days.
That’s not to say there isn’t interest in the draft. There’s always the hope that John Paxson can call up Isiah Thomas and offer him Lawrence Funderburke for the eighth pick in the first round.
Plus, it’ll be interesting to see where Illini point guard Deron Williams goes. He’s now rated by most teams as the third best player in the draft behind Andrew Bogut and Marvin Williams, but the team with the third pick, Portland drafted point guard Sebastian Telfair last year and won’t take Deron. So do the Blazers trade? Do they trade for two picks in the top 13 with Charlotte? Do they deal with Utah, because Jerry Sloan has a hard-on for Deron? Ooh, the intrigue.
Is Deron better than Wake Forest point guard Chris Paul? That’s a good question. Deron’s an inch taller than Paul, who looks like he’s 12 years old, still. Paul is a better shooter and is quicker, but teams love Deron’s pass-first mentality and his superior defense. They’re apples and oranges. If you want a scoring point you take Chris, if you want a true point you take Deron.
As you know, many NBA teams actively seek my counsel in the days before the draft. I had lunch with Milwaukee Bucks GM Larry Harris when I was in Milwaukee for the Cubs-Brewers game. Over cheese curds and Leinenkugel’s I tried to convince him that on my draft board I had Marvin Williams number one and Andrew Bogut crumpled up and tossed under the couch.
Larry didn’t appear to be swayed. I just don’t see the appeal in Bogut. Sure he’s 7 feet tall and can pass, but you know what, so is Chris Mihm, and he’s on his fourth team in six years, and it’ll be five once Phil Jackson sees him at a mini-camp.
I understand why teams are leery of Marvin Williams. He didn’t start in college (though he was at worst the second best player on his team), and he’s a Roy Williams’ recruit and the only one of those who’s gone on to an above-average NBA career has been stabbed a couple dozen times. Also, I’m biased because if Marvin had done the right thing and gone to the NBA last year the Illini would be National Champions because his tip-in when the game was tied at 75 was the real difference in the title game.
If I had the top pick, it’d be a no-brainer. I’d take Marvin. I’d also take the opportunity to do an interview with Chad Ford and to squeeze his little pin head until it popped. But that’s just me.
So, how are you, Andy?
You have no video of me missing the cutoff man! There is no video!
“worthless, allegedly speedy utility man”
Worthless? Yes.
Allegedly speedy? No, Jerry the Lesser’s speedy all right, he just doesn’t know how to run the bases which, of course, makes his speed totally irrelevant. Kind of like Dwight Smith. You would think the son of a big-leaguer would have better baseball instincts but his statue-of-liberty play on Patterson’s bloop hit in Milwaukee that turned into a forceout, when Helen Keller would have been able to discern that the ball was going to drop, as well as his inability to score on Patterson’s infield grounder Saturday that Iguchi dove for (maybe hejust hates Patterson too?), not to mention his atrocious 6-13 stolen base ratio, sort of proves that but he doesn’t, in fact, know how to run the friggin bases. Like good ole’ Smitty, he’s got wheels, he just needs a flashlight and map when he’s, you know, running.
But can he sing?
I loved the Stone Pony when he was the best color man in baseball, but as an outsider/media gadfly, I’m sick of his bitter ass. Go home to the desert, Cigar Boy
Of course, the Score has kind of made a habit of running bitter ex-athletes out there for our consumption.
Right, Gale Sayers? Et tu, Norm VanLier?
Sloth,
I’m never hiring you to be the lifeguard at my pool again!
No All-Star love for me, Andy?
Outside of your boyfriend LoDuca, and Ponch there’s no NL catcher having a better all-around year than me.
I will be sending Kelton, Remlinger, and Wellemeyer to Seattle for everyday Eddie and Randy Winn.
Screw you, Michael! I am the All-Star Catcher!
My HWEqBA is .500! What is yours? .275? Hah!
Not so fast, Jimbo. Kelton, Wellemeyer, Remlinger AND Enrique Wilson or no deal.
you still have doubts if we are nuts because of the potential deal we are about to make with the marlins?
How about some proof that we indeed are nuts: WE TOOK SAM-ME!!
Last night, in my start 27 of my first 30 pitches were fastballs. I am in love with one pitch. Maybe that’s why my ERA is so high, I must have shaken Fasano off at least 2 times every at bat until he finally started calling all fastballs. Then I started getting hit. My breaking stuff is okay but I never use it. What I am getting at, is I could basically be a clone of Burnett, altough my curve isn’t as good, but I insist on acting like I know best. I am 5 years younger and I throw just as hard. Why would the Orioles trade their future away? With a little coaching, and a little less hard headedness I could be a good right handed starter. Why trade me and my cheap contract for a guy who is due for a big payday, and who’s elbow has been reconstructed?
Remember when we were bad mouthing the Cubs and their fans saying shit to the effect of, they don’t know what they are losing, He’s gonna tear it up for us…blah…blah….etc…boy do we look stupid. Had we watched this guy at all the last few years?
In my gay and infintite wisdom, I predicted a huge year for Sosa. I am such a hero worshipper it’s sick. I would lick any MLB players jockstrap clean, just to be around him. I am terrible.
I thought Sammy’d have a big homer year, not so much in the average, but he’s been awful.
Question…
If the Bulls sign Curry to the max contract, and he dies of a heart-attack, wouldn’t it mean that the Bulls would off the hook for the contract? And wouldn’t that be an argument FOR signing Curry to said contract?
{just sitting here trying in vain to reach my arms all the way around my back to pat it}
By the looks of the picture at the top of this page, we’ve got so much smaller since our owner came off the juice that he’s stopped elasticating his sleeves to show us off.
You guys should sign Eddie to a long term deal, he’ll be fine…trust me.
Why can’t the Chicago dailies have smart, detailed, informative stories on things like pitching mechanics and coaching like I do? This is arguably the only sort of story that a daily reporter can do better than bloggers or the BP stat-head guys can do. But in Chicago? Just game recaps and rehashing the daily press release talking points from the Cubs.
Great town…awful sportswriters.
The Trib sports page is awful, led by that clown Dan McGrath. Have you ever heard this dickwad interiewed by Boers and Bernstein? What a weenie.
What I find interesting is that all three major dailies have the same stuff in them from Day One in Spring training. What crap.
“Don’t be so smarmy, just say hello!”
That is an example of how I have began a conversation with Boers and Bernstein.
Actually, I still have the elastic in my sleeves. Buddy.
We are so pathetic, that we allowed the one soox fan with a computer to hack in and pad the votes in our poll. And rather than fix it, or you know, get some better firewalls, we gave a pansy ass editors note telling everyone to have fun. Every sports page and writer in this town is a joke…a fucking joke.
will be watching Sammy & his agent beg some perennial 4th place team for a contract this winter. Poor delusional pock-faced bastard…
Did someone say bad writing? Why am I passed off as a great writer by the always painful espn? I mean, I am like a partially autistic guy who gets a hold of a phone book, and tries to rearrange it, but it still looks like a reatrd did it, beccause I don’t have the valuable part of autism. I mean how can a win be worth more than onw win? Why do people liste to me? Why do they actually pay for my articles…anyone?
Hey Sam, my man, just chill dude. The Cubs have a history of taking formerly-great players at the very end of their careers and giving them a home. You’ll be back in Chicago no problem, buddy.
Andrew Bogut is crumpled up under your couch, Andy? That’s slightly disturbing.
If the Blazers keep the #3 pick, gotta think they take Chris Paul, even though they drafted Sebastian Telfair last year. Paul is the only player on the board to have undisputably punched someone (Julius Hodge) in the jimmy last year — and that’s just oh so Blazer.
Clearly though, the biggest winner in this draft will be all of us that stay up late enough to hear Shavlik Randolph’s name called. There’s the day Kennedy was shot, the day the Challenger blew up, the day A.C. chauffeured O.J. and the day that Shavlik Randolph enters the league. It’s a historical event you’ll someday be telling your children’s children about.
You want to hear Shavlik’s name called? I think the CBA draft is in August.
I am a Gladiator, we always come back to the stage, we are always prepared to do battle.
Don’t hate the Shavlik, Andy. Hate the game.
I urge you… the red-blooded, SUV drivin’ Amuricans to “stay the course” with Sammy. He’s a good shit.
Sammy, along with A-Rod, will hit 50 homers this year. Oh well, at least one prediction may come true.
Chad Ford’s receding hairline says it’s a done deal. The #3 pick to the Jazz for #6, #27 and a future first. 50% chance Deron plays in Utah next year, 50% chance he doesn’t and Chris Paul hits him in the jimmy on his way to the podium….
My mommy has to cut my meat for me.
I’m predicting that Doug Davis–he of the 134 career victories against the Cubs–will not get out of the first inning tonight.
Didn’t Shavlik withdraw his name from the draft? That’s the best move he’s made on or off the court in several years.
I hear Shav’s momma’s got big hands…
Dave B. didja listen to those Peoria Chiefs last night? Sean Gallagher, he of the 1.43 ERA pitched 7 innings of shutout ball against our own CR Kernels. I listened on 1600 AM and the play-by-play guy was going nuts over Gallagher’s curveball. Btw this was the first I’d heard of 3B Aaron Sisk. What’s the scoop on this guy? Looks like Peoria has some good prospects on this club: Ryan Harvey, Gallagher, Luis Montanez (OK not so good), Gallagher and Sisk. Looking forward to seeing these guys when they come to CR in July.
Kind of hard to consider me much of a prospect. Sure, my numbers look good, but I’m also a twenty-three year old pinning back the ears of a bunch of teenagers.
Kind of hard to know why the Cubs haven’t released Montanez. is it because they still believe he could make it? because it’s embarrasing to the guys who draft talent? or because he might be a toss-in on a July trade?
He’s getting first round money. They’ll promote him to West Tenn next year, he’ll hit .235 and then get released.
You know who else is getting first-round money?… Shavlik Randolph — that’s who!
Coach K didn’t know what to do with the Shav, couldn’t understand what makes the Shav tick. You know who could understand? The Miami Heat with the #29 pick — that’s who!
2006 Miami Heat: Shav and Shaq, and oh yeah — Flash! Shavvvvvvvvvvv-tastic!
I also predicted Korey would be a 30-30 guy.
I jst don;’t think they’ve released Montanez because there’s no real reason to. His bonus has already been paid. He didn’t get drafted in the rule V draft, so he doesn’t have ot be on the 40-man roster. I think he’s turned into what is known as organizational filler…
My First Round Picks:
1995-Kerry Wood (at #5, even a blind squirrel’s gonna unearth one…)
1996 Todd Noel (G’UH!)
1997 Jon Garland (on whom I subsequently spazzed out and traded for a crappy reliever)
1998 Patterson (#3….see above…and even CP’s questionable right now)
1999 Ben Christiansen (that was cute. Thought I was going to “steal” him at the bottom of the 1st round. NOT)
2000–Montanez (Currently on teh Earl Cunningham track–aka barely scratched AA)
Boy, thank God for the sheer ineptitude of Jim Frey and Larry Himes; otherwise my legacy would be even worse than it is.
who you calling a “bold, bug eyed freak”?
BOLD, bug eyed freak? that would be me
BALD, bug eyed freak? that would be you uncle fester….and jeromy
Hot rumor of the day:
Cedeno getting called up and Enrique being released. Anyone know if this is true?
I’m up, Bitches!
And I’m down!
Where am I on this bullshit Cedeno-Joe Camel thing?
Source?
ESPN 1000 supposedly.
Its Here too…
And a fond fairwell to the Enrique Wilson era… who knew enough about Yankee Stadium to hit .229 there.
It’s official.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/transactions
umm..Jake, I am coming back to Duke to give you all the “best fans in college basketball” a chance to watch my skills.
I’d walk a mile for a Camel
Let’s face it, I told Shav to beat it. I need that scholarship for other guys. Besides, I’m a leader, not a coach. I’m also one of the world’s biggest phonies. I should die.