Hello again, everybody!Hello again, everybody, your old pal Karry Ling here with today’s Daily Dose. I got a call from Andy last night around 9:30 p.m. and it was pretty much just a stream of profanity directed at Michael Barrett, lazy Cubs’ pitchers and Dusty and it ended with, ‘You write the (blankety blank) thing tomorrow.’

I can’t say I blame him. I haven’t seen such a fundamental lack of execution since the guy in The Green Mile chose not to soak the sponge in water before they hit the switch. Ouch.

I can see how a guy can forget to cover first base once, especially on a play where Derrek Lee makes a great play, but it’s obvious that we watch more of the Cubs’ games than the guys in the bullpen or on the bench, because two different guys did the same thing in the same game. By my count that makes six times this season a pitcher has failed to cover first base in time, three last night, Mark Prior in St. Louis a couple of Sunday’s ago, Will Ohman in Yankee Stadium and Kerry Wood early on in the season.

Six? That has to be some kind of record

You notice you don’t see Carlos Zambrano or Greg Maddux on the list. Maddux might get beaten to the bag, but you can guarantee he was running over there from the time the ball was hit, and Zambrano tries to run over the baserunner on his way to first.

What was amazing about last night’s game was that the failure to cover first on three seperate occasions wasn’t the worst display of lackluster fundamentals in the game. Not even close.

In the ninth inning, with the bases loaded, one out and the game-winning run on third base, Dusty followed up one foolhardy move with another. First, he started the inning with Remlinger (always a bad idea), then he walked the bases loaded on purpose and brought in Michael Wuertz. Wuertz is rarely a better than 50-50 proposition when it comes to not walking the first batter…or the first three batters for that matter.

But it should have worked. Wuertz struck out Pat Burrell, only to have Michael Barrett pull off a rare trifecta on one play. First, he didn’t catch the ball, then as Burrell ran to first (which didn’t matter because with first base occupied and one out before his K he could not advance to first) Barrett at first looked like he was going to try to tag Pat, then in mistake number two he took two steps towards the runner, Jimmy Rollins, who was halfway to home and completely screwed, then Barrett threw the ball into left field.

Barrett ran at Rollins but didn’t even get him to committ to running back towards third. That’s the key there. You run at the runner and once he starts back towards third you throw to the third baseman. The worst that can happen at that point is that he’ll beat your throw back to the bag and the bases are still loaded but with two outs. Barrett didn’t even do that. Even had he not made a horrid throw, there’s a good chance Rollins was going to beat the return throw home, especially since Barrett was completely out of position to take the return throw. To complicate matters, even had he been able to hustle back to the plate before the throw came back, Michael Wuertz was standing right by the plate, too. In the world of the Cubs, what would have happened is that Wuertz would have thought Barrett was going to take the throw and Barrett would have though Wuertz was, resulting in a throw sailing between them to lose the game. Now that would have been epic.

Yesterday, Andy wrote that he’s never seen a team so full of excuses as the Cubs are. Mostly, Dusty makes excuses for the guys. Dusty thinks he’s still a player so he tries to cover for his guys. That’s fine. I’m sure they appreciate it, even if it serves to make him seem like the dumbest man in any room. But Dusty wasn’t going to make an excuse for Barrett, and nobody can blame him. So Barrett made his own. Check out this nonsense.

I can’t blame [home plate umpire Dana DeMuth]. The place is so loud. I was expecting a foul tip call and didn’t get it.

Wait a minute. The catcher wanted a foul tip call on a third strike so that the batter wouldn’t have been out? And the same guy didn’t bother to catch it because he thought it was foul tipped?

Look, if you’re so keenly aware of your surroundings that you can determine when a ball is foul-tipped and make a nanosecond judgment to let the ball go because you don’t “need” to catch it, you are in the wrong business. You ought to be an air traffic controller, you have such a gift at making quick decisions. It’s impressive.

Look, Mikey. Nobody cares that you didn’t catch the pitch, whether it was foul tipped or not. It was when you threw the ball to Todd Hollandsworth instead of Aramis Ramirez that created the angst.

All this does is point out what we’ve known for a long time. The Cubs haven’t a clue how to play baseball. Every player on every team will make a bad throw on occasion. But it was the panic that proceeded the throw that is most troubling. Barrett didn’t know what to do.

I’m sure people will alibi him and say, “Well, he hasn’t been a catcher that long, he’s a converted infielder and…” blah, blah, blah. He’s being paid quite handsomely to be a catcher and he’s a bad one. The Cubs made a decision two years ago to go with offense over defense behind the plate. That decision made no sense at the time, and makes even less now. The one thing this team was supposed to have was great, young, starting pitching. What you needed was a “catcher”, not a hitter who squats.

We even saw evidence of his incompetence on Tuesday night during Ryan Dempster’s “save.” Dempster couldn’t throw anything but his fastball for a strike, and there he was throwing slider and splitter over and over and over again, most missing the plate by a foot or two. Are you telling me that Mike Matheny, or Brad Ausmus, or anybody wearing the Braves’ catching gear would have kept calling for that stuff?

Cubs’ fans, and especially those who hung out here, were all over the Damian Miller-Gabor Paul Bako II catching tandem in 2003, but at the time we accepted it because we felt like the Cubs wanted defensive-oriented catchers to work with guys like Prior, Zambrano, Wood, etc. Bako batted like he was holding a candle at home plate, and Miller wasn’t a whole lot better, but when the Cubs’ upgraded their offense at most of the other seven positions over the past two seasons, they would have been wise to have found two more defense-oriented catchers to give those jobs too. It didn’t have to be them, of course.

We can debate the reasons that the Cubs’ pitchers have an ERA of more than a run less when Henry Blanco catches, than they do under Barrett, for hours. Hank has been catching Prior and Zambrano, so of course his ERA should be less.

But you know that Cubs’ pitchers trust Blanco more behind the plate than they do Barrett. Heck, last year they trusted Bako more than Barrett, and that’s hard to fathom.

Even when they catch the same guy, they call games completely differently. Watch Blanco catch Zambrano. Carlos throws mostly fastballs. In, out, up, down, just fastball after fastball. Then he breaks out the slider or, even better, the 65 MPH change on occasion. With Barrett, Zambrano throws many more sliders. On nights like Tuesday when his fastball was sinking off the table and his slider was just filthy, it doesn’t matter what Carlos throws, the other team won’t hit it. But when he gets into trouble it’s because he can’t throw his fastball for a strike.

Barrett goes to calling for almost all sliders when that happens.

Blanco forces Zambrano to throw fastballs. Remember the day in San Diego when he went to the mound and told Carlos to throw it for a strike or he’d “slap him?” The reason is simple. If Carlos doesn’t command his fastball, he’s going to get hit. Barrett might sneak him through an inning or two with mostly sliders, but eventually he’ll hang one, and if he’s throwing nothing but them, the batter will be sitting on it and it’s going to get hit very hard, and that normally means Carlos will hang the next one, and then the one after that.

And that’s just one example. It’s just the most obvious. Does it mean Blanco is a catching sage? Of course not. As much as we enjoy pretending he’s a folk hero, Hank’s merely an above average Major League catcher defensively and a below average catcher offensively. Barrett is just the opposite. That’s fine. It’s nice to have a catcher with an actual clue at the plate, and though he failed miserably on three seperate occasions last night, Barrett’s an asset most nights with a bat his hand. It’s just that when your bread and butter is supposed to be your pitching staff, it seems ridiculous to choose offense over defense at that spot.

What it also begs you to consider is that perhaps the Cubs are just inadequately coached. Dusty lamented the fact that Major League staffs have to “teach” more than they used to. Well, then do it.

Unless Corey Patterson is the most stubborn human on the planet (and he might be), you have to wonder not if the Cubs were trying to fix his approach at the plate, but rather how they were trying to fix it. Has anyone stopped to consider that maybe they were giving Corey plenty of advice and that it wasn’t that he wasn’t trying to incorporate it, but rather that the advice was all crap?

Tiger Woods could hire me to be his personal coach and I could stand out at the range with him for hours giving him tips and he’d get worse every day because I don’t know squat about how to break down a golf swing. If you’ve seen me play, you know that to be true. Tiger would eventually get the point where he couldn’t even draw back on his old, proven, swing because I would have confused him so much he wouldn’t be able to recall it.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I give you Sarge Matthews and Gene Clines!

Should big league pitchers be able to remember to cover first base. Yes. You’d think so.

Even when you factor in the injuries to Nomar and Wood and Prior, this Cubs’ team has no business hanging out at the .500 mark. They have underperformed consistently for a year and two-thirds now.

They cleaned out about half their roster in the offseason because last year’s team so fundamentally lacking, and this year’s team isn’t any better.

What’s left to clean out?

Just make sure you pick up all those toothpicks before you leave.