Rather than get arrested like his teammates, he took the easy way out

[Richard Chuggar]

Not surprising given his history, but...

Preliminary reports indicate, a domestic situation began at a residence on Peachtree Road. According to police, his fiance got into a pickup truck and drove away from the residence. As she was driving away, Henry jumped into the bed of the truck. Police say at some point when his fiance was driving, Henry fell out of the back of the vehicle.

Sounds more like a dump truck than a pickup truck, if you ask me.

I'm pretty sure nobody would ever ask you anything.

Why are you still here? Cubbiejulie just put on her mistletoe underwear.

B/c if I wanted to kiss a fat, ugly girl on her vagina while wearing holiday underwear, I would have done it to you at your christmas party the other night?

Sure.

You two are the Holocaust and Plague of comedy.

What's not funny about either of those?

The Holocaust only recently became funny.  The Plague has always been funny.

We might not get 9/11 for some time though.

Also, how can TDubbs not be the Plague?

Thanks for thinking that I've always been funny.  I think you're keen too, Gilly

[Gil Gunderson]

Not surprising given his history, but...

Preliminary reports indicate, a domestic situation began at a residence on Peachtree Road. According to police, his fiance got into a pickup truck and drove away from the residence. As she was driving away, Henry jumped into the bed of the truck. Police say at some point when his fiance was driving, Henry fell out of the back of the vehicle.

Sounds more like a dump truck than a pickup truck, if you ask me.

I'm pretty sure nobody would ever ask you anything.

Why are you still here? Cubbiejulie just put on her mistletoe underwear.

B/c if I wanted to kiss a fat, ugly girl on her vagina while wearing holiday underwear, I would have done it to you at your christmas party the other night?

Sure.

You two are the Holocaust and Plague of comedy.

What's not funny about either of those?

The Holocaust only recently became funny.  The Plague has always been funny.

We might not get 9/11 for some time though.

Also, how can TDubbs not be the Plague?

Thanks for thinking that I've always been funny.  I think you're keen too, Gilly

I like how neat you are.

[Bonk]

Here in Cincinnati that's the only fucking news in town. I'm already sick of it.

I love all these people that say it's such a shame because "he turned his life around". Well, no, it looks like he was back to his thug-like behavior just 20 months after his last arrest for punching a guy in the face unprevoked and throwing a beer bottle through his car window.

[powen01]

Here in Cincinnati that's the only fucking news in town. I'm already sick of it.

I love all these people that say it's such a shame because "he turned his life around". Well, no, it looks like he was back to his thug-like behavior just 20 months after his last arrest for punching a guy in the face unprevoked and throwing a beer bottle through his car window.

Exactly. I didn't realize that turning my life around meant jumping into the back of a pickup driven by my fiancé so that we could continue a "vigorous conversation".

I just want to know what his last words were. My money is on "Bitch, I'm 'a kill you!".

I hate Cincinnati.

[Quality Start Machine]

Not surprising given his history, but...

Preliminary reports indicate, a domestic situation began at a residence on Peachtree Road. According to police, his fiance got into a pickup truck and drove away from the residence. As she was driving away, Henry jumped into the bed of the truck. Police say at some point when his fiance was driving, Henry fell out of the back of the vehicle.

Sounds more like a dump truck than a pickup truck, if you ask me.

I'm pretty sure nobody would ever ask you anything.

Why are you still here? Cubbiejulie just put on her mistletoe underwear.

B/c if I wanted to kiss a fat, ugly girl on her vagina while wearing holiday underwear, I would have done it to you at your christmas party the other night?

Sure.

You two are the Holocaust and Plague of comedy.

What's not funny about either of those?

The Holocaust only recently became funny.  The Plague has always been funny.

We might not get 9/11 for some time though.

Also, how can TDubbs not be the Plague?

9/11 jokes are acceptable between New Yorkers. Kind of like how Hitler jokes were the private domain of Jewish comedians for decades.

[BH]

http://blogs.suntimes.com/sportsprose/2009/12/chris_henry_threatened_to_kill.html

"Tonga's neighbor, Lee Hardy, was perched on a 15-foot ladder cutting back some trees when he saw the yellow pickup "zooming" up the Tongas' gravel driveway just a few yards away. Hardy said a shirtless black man clung to the top and side of the truck while standing in the bed, begging her to stop the vehicle.

"He was banging on the top, on the doors, screaming at the lady, 'We need to talk,'" Hardy said. "He said, 'If you take off, I'm going to jump off the truck and kill myself.'"

Hardy said she stopped, hesitating at the end of the driveway, and took off. "

[powen01]

http://blogs.suntimes.com/sportsprose/2009/12/chris_henry_threatened_to_kill.html

"Tonga's neighbor, Lee Hardy, was perched on a 15-foot ladder cutting back some trees when he saw the yellow pickup "zooming" up the Tongas' gravel driveway just a few yards away. Hardy said a shirtless black man clung to the top and side of the truck while standing in the bed, begging her to stop the vehicle.

"He was banging on the top, on the doors, screaming at the lady, 'We need to talk,'" Hardy said. "He said, 'If you take off, I'm going to jump off the truck and kill myself.'"

Hardy said she stopped, hesitating at the end of the driveway, and took off. "

That's a real gamer right there.  He's not just all talk like some other guys.

[Kermit, B.]

Here in Cincinnati that's the only fucking news in town. I'm already sick of it.

I love all these people that say it's such a shame because "he turned his life around". Well, no, it looks like he was back to his thug-like behavior just 20 months after his last arrest for punching a guy in the face unprevoked and throwing a beer bottle through his car window.

He had an interview just earlier this year during which he said he'd turned his life around "360 degrees."  I'd say that's about right.

[PenFoe]

Marvin comes up big.

Cincinnati quarterback Carson Palmer and head coach Marvin Lewis were expected to deliver eulogies. Lewis said before the service that Henry touched a lot of people in his very short life.