Cubs 2012-2013 Offseason "Epstink is Terrible" Thread

[Quality Start Machine]

Hoystink is terrible.

[CBStew]

Household names.  Every last one of them.

The 16 have signed minor league contracts.
Lillibridge, 28, played with the Sox from 2009 to last season when he split the year with Cleveland and Boston.
Outfielder Bogusevic, 28, hit .203 in 146 games with the Astros last season.
The other signees include catcher J.C. Boscan; right-handed pitcher Andrew Carpenter; right-handed pitcher Jaye Chapman; outfielder Johermyn Chavez; right-handed pitcher Dayan Diaz; infielder Alberto Gonzalez; right-handed pitcher Jensen Lewis; infielder Edwin Maysonet; outfielder Darnell McDonald; first baseman-outfielder Brad Nelson; right-handed pitcher Blake Parker; right-handed pitcher Zack Putnam; left-handed pitcher Hisanori Takahashi, and right-handed pitcher Cory Wade.

[R-V]

The Cubs signed Jerry the Lesser's little brother last night and nary a mention of it on this sports-site?

A Schierholtz-Hairston platoon in RF could be pretty damn solid.

[Internet Apex]

The Cubs signed Jerry the Lesser's little brother last night and nary a mention of it on this sports-site?

A Schierholtz-Hairston platoon in RF could be pretty damn solid.

Solid like Sammy Sosa or like Jeromy Burnitz? What are we talking here? 

[PenFoe]

The Cubs signed Jerry the Lesser's little brother last night and nary a mention of it on this sports-site?

A Schierholtz-Hairston platoon in RF could be pretty damn solid.

We had a half-hearted Scott Hairston day in the SBox.

What I mean is, it was totally epic, bro.

[R-V]

The Cubs signed Jerry the Lesser's little brother last night and nary a mention of it on this sports-site?

A Schierholtz-Hairston platoon in RF could be pretty damn solid.

Solid like Sammy Sosa or like Jeromy Burnitz? What are we talking here? 

Solid like an Apex NBA predictions post. Entertaining enough to get you through the doldrums of a work day but ultimately not championship material.

[Internet Apex]

The Cubs signed Jerry the Lesser's little brother last night and nary a mention of it on this sports-site?

A Schierholtz-Hairston platoon in RF could be pretty damn solid.

Solid like Sammy Sosa or like Jeromy Burnitz? What are we talking here? 

Solid like an Apex NBA predictions post. Entertaining enough to get you through the doldrums of a work day but ultimately not championship material.

Ah, so we're talking Milton Bradley solid.