The Hustle

[Saul Goodman]

Absolutely awful. The plot makes no sense and careens from one scene to another without bothering to explain how or why it got there, Hathaway is a wet mop with no charisma, the ending pretty much smashes the half-assed “yay women” marketing conceit to bits, and all of the characters are either paper-thin plot devices or exceedingly unlikeable caricatures without a single redeeming quality among them.

It’s an absolute disaster and the worst movie I’ve seen in a theatre since The Happening. This is a comedy in name only. I chuckled at a few of Rebel Wilson’s lines (“I’m salad-intolerant” to a waiter) and nothing else. One review said they laughed out loud at a wordplay joke involving a hotel room so I’ll save you the $17: we briefly see a placard on the door of a hotel room in France that says “Suite Caroline.” That’s it. That’s the joke. The Hustle, everyone!

[Saul Goodman]

Oh. OH. And as if all that wasn’t enough, the end credits roll to an obnoxious pop song that’s trying way too hard to convince you that the singer is a “badass woman.” Clearly the hope was this immediately forgettable tune with off-the-shelf “empowerment” lyrics would turn into some kind of anthem. I looked it up afterward and, of course, it was written and recorded by Meghan Trainor. Which is actually the most inspired choice of the entire movie because her cloying brand of white corporate feminism couldn’t be more on-point. I like to think Beyonc? was approached first, took one look at a pre-release cut, and left without saying a word.

[Quality Start Machine]

Absolutely awful. The plot makes no sense and careens from one scene to another without bothering to explain how or why it got there, Hathaway is a wet mop with no charisma, the ending pretty much smashes the half-assed ?yay women? marketing conceit to bits, and all of the characters are either paper-thin plot devices or exceedingly unlikeable caricatures without a single redeeming quality among them.

It?s an absolute disaster and the worst movie I?ve seen in a theatre since The Happening. This is a comedy in name only. I chuckled at a few of Rebel Wilson?s lines (?I?m salad-intolerant? to a waiter) and nothing else. One review said they laughed out loud at a wordplay joke involving a hotel room so I?ll save you the $17: we briefly see a placard on the door of a hotel room in France that says ?Suite Caroline.? That?s it. That?s the joke. The Hustle, everyone!

Everyone knows the only way to watch an Anne Hathaway movie is to find out if there are bewbs, then watch the bewb scenes online.