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Author Topic: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?  ( 13,206 )

SD

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Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« on: May 12, 2005, 02:42:25 PM »
It seems like the release date everyone's (well, most of society, questionable or not)  been talking about just crept up on us.  Who else is gonna be Vader'ing-out next week?  I haven't read a lick of spoilers, and recently had to reprimand some ass who spoiled a line from a commercial.  When I see this film, I wanna know 0% about it, aside from what Episode II portends it to be, and from what Episode IV reflects it to be.

Of course I realize that creating a thread about it on a message board invites that spoiler sort of thing, but I figure I can ditch'n'roll outta the thread if it comes to that.

That said, I am going to place **** 1/4 expectations on it.  The highest expectations I've placed on George Lucas in a Star Wars film (although I wasn't around 'til Jedi was out).  Ever!

I had two VHS copies of the original trilogy at some points, but never got the dvds, or the first two Episodes.  I will probably secure those five this weekend leading up to the filim, so I can lay some standards down proper, get a refresher on the SW vibe, get hyped for the theater, and reaffirm/adjust my current stances on the previous films.  They range from *** 1/2 to the hallowed Gold Five Star.  Yep, five of 'em, and they're gold too!  Not many films have achieved that mark.

That being because I've not viewed a good number of movies.
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Chuck

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2005, 03:01:20 PM »
Quote from: SD on May 12, 2005, 02:42:25 PM
That said, I am going to place **** 1/4 expectations on it.
Prepare to be disappointed.

Quote from: SD on May 12, 2005, 02:42:25 PM
I will probably secure those five this weekend leading up to the filim, so I can lay some standards down proper, get a refresher on the SW vibe, get hyped for the theater, and reaffirm/adjust my current stances on the previous films.
Here's your summary:
Ep I: Kill the kid and put us out of our missery
Ep II: Nice battle.  Was there a plot and any acting worth talking about?

Ep IV: One of the most wonderful movies ever made.
Ep V: Thank god Leigh Brackett wrote it and not Lucas.
Ep: VI: Ewoks suck.  Couldn't they have been Wookies?

MrSpeed

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2005, 03:09:12 PM »
Here's your spoiler ... Anakin is Vader!!!!

CT

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2005, 03:12:27 PM »
Quote from: MrSpeed on May 12, 2005, 03:09:12 PM
Here's your spoiler ... Anakin is Vader!!!!

SPOILER: Bobby's still alive, Pam dreamt the whole thing.
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Mike D.

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2005, 03:16:27 PM »
Quote from: CT on May 12, 2005, 03:12:27 PM
Quote from: MrSpeed on May 12, 2005, 03:09:12 PM
Here's your spoiler ... Anakin is Vader!!!!

SPOILER: Bobby's still alive, Pam dreamt the whole thing.

SPOILER ALERT:  The chick's got a dick!
As refreshing as an advertising campaign that doesn't suck.

Chuck

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2005, 03:17:41 PM »
When Samuel Jackson dies, you can see the words "BAD MOTHERFUCKER" on his lightsaber.

SD

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2005, 03:38:57 PM »
Quote from: Chuck on May 12, 2005, 03:01:20 PM
Here's your summary:
Ep I: Kill the kid and put us out of our missery
Ep II: Nice battle.  Was there a plot and any acting worth talking about?

Ep IV: One of the most wonderful movies ever made.
Ep V: Thank god Leigh Brackett wrote it and not Lucas.
Ep: VI: Ewoks suck.  Couldn't they have been Wookies?

For sake of reference -- my current star rating (0-5 in increments of 0.25) stances on the five.  Subject to ratcheting/tinkering upon reacquiring the films.

Ep I:  ***1/4
Ep II: ****

Ep IV: **** 3/4
Ep V: *****
Ep VI: *****
Alpha And Omega.  The Beginning And The End.  The First And The Last.

MrSpeed

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #7 on: May 12, 2005, 03:40:14 PM »
Natalie Portman does a pole dance on Obi-Wan's light sabre.  The results are ... umm ... not good.


And to be serious, I probably will check out this flick within the first week.  It definately won't be the first couple days.  I've also heard really good things about it.

Chuck

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #8 on: May 12, 2005, 03:47:29 PM »
Ep I:  *
Ep II: * 1/2

Ep IV: ****
Ep V:  ****
Ep VI: ** 1/2

No movie with Ewoks can be better than the first Star Wars.

I love that in the new DVDs they have a clip of some new star wars game (Battlefront, I think).  They show an Ewok taking a laser shot between the eyes.

Even the people making this stuff know Ewoks suck.

SD

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #9 on: May 13, 2005, 01:00:40 AM »
To clarify, a major reason why I have always held Return of the Jedi in higher regard is because the sequence with Luke repeatedly smashing his lightsaber violently into Vader's defensive stance, with Vader's guard finally breaking down, resulting in his hand being severed again, is my absolute most favorite scene in any movie ever filmed.

Quote from: Chuck on May 12, 2005, 03:47:29 PM
I love that in the new DVDs they have a clip of some new star wars game (Battlefront, I think). They show an Ewok taking a laser shot between the eyes.

I wonder how many units of this game EA moved by including that clip in their trailers/commercials for promoting the game?  I contend a majority of copies sold were on the premise of being able to ace an Ewok.
Alpha And Omega.  The Beginning And The End.  The First And The Last.

thehawk

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #10 on: May 13, 2005, 10:45:12 AM »
QuoteThat said, I am going to place **** 1/4 expectations on it.  The highest expectations I've placed on George Lucas in a Star Wars film (although I wasn't around 'til Jedi was out). 

Thanks for making me feel very very old.

Its a wierd thing, I wasnt quite old enough to go to the first  Star Wars, now I probably wont be able to go to this one because I cannot find a sitter for my newborn. Yikes.
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CT

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2005, 10:55:37 AM »
Quote from: thehawk on May 13, 2005, 10:45:12 AM
Thanks for making me feel very very old.

Its a wierd thing, I wasnt quite old enough to go to the first  Star Wars, now I probably wont be able to go to this one because I cannot find a sitter for my newborn. Yikes.

Hey congrats Hawk!  You getting any sleep yet?
A day job? In an office? My worst nightmare come true!

thehawk

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #12 on: May 13, 2005, 11:26:38 AM »
Yeah, I'm sleeping like a baby...

....I wake up every 3 hours screaming my head off

Seriously Max (who was born 3 weeks ago yesterday) has been ok, except for last night... but work seems a little less of a chore (even if there isnt a Dose to read every day)
Andre Dawson paid his $1,000 fine for the Joe West incident with style. Dawson wrote ``Donation for the blind`` in the memo section of his personal check.

JH

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #13 on: May 13, 2005, 11:32:34 AM »
Quote from: SD on May 12, 2005, 02:42:25 PM
It seems like the release date everyone's (well, most of society, questionable or not)  been talking about just crept up on us.  Who else is gonna be Vader'ing-out next week?

Well, for one, Vader himself is Vader'ing out . . .

http://darthside.blogspot.com/

These movies have always been on the cutting edge of special effects, but there is tons of cheese in them. I enjoy the series as much as many 30-somethings, but there is much to wince at throughout the released 5 movies:

> Anakin's pathetic pick-up line: "I don't like sand. It's rough. Not like your skin."
> Luke's pouty whining to his Uncle Owen: "But I was going into Toshi Station to pick up some power converters!"
> Jar-Jar Binks' ebonics. All of them, Okey-day?
> The wooden dummy that is Jake Lloyd in Episode I.
> Luke's wailing: "Nooooooooo! Noooo!"

Lucas is an amazing visual director. Too bad he can't direct actual people and give them compelling dialog.

Chuck

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Re: Holy smokes, Star Wars Episode III opens next Thursday?
« Reply #14 on: May 13, 2005, 02:25:52 PM »
The Darthside blog is brilliant stuff.  Found it via Vodka pundit.  How'd you find it?