Single Greatest Thread Ever

[Gilgamesh]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

[Internet Apex]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

[Powdered Toast Man]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

Derrek Lee is Jayson Heyward in 13 years.

[Slaky]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

[Quality Start Machine]

fuck the standing O, he beat us in 2003.

In fact, fuck standing Os in general.

[Internet Apex]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

This is inspired work.

[CT III]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

[Gilgamesh]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

Derrek Lee is Jayson Heyward in 13 years.

How will that happen?

[SKO]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

[Slaky]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

[Internet Apex]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

I slow danced with him at Stanley's once to Patsy Cline's "Crazy." Never. Again.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

Slak's just pissed that he bought all these shirts only to find out that Lee's daughter was totally faking it the whole time.

[SKO]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

Slak's just pissed that he bought all these shirts only to find out that Lee's daughter was totally faking it the whole time.

He's just acting tough to make sure his internet personality matches his ruggedly handsome features. That beard hides so much inner pain, and all.

[Slaky]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

Slak's just pissed that he bought all these shirts only to find out that Lee's daughter was totally faking it the whole time.

He's just acting tough to make sure his internet personality matches his ruggedly handsome features. That beard hides so much inner pain, and all.

It's true. The little guy who used to love the Cubs is all but dead. It's torture.

[R-V]

Derrek Lee.

Career OPS as a Cub:  .904

FYC

Proving Lee doesn't belong on this list.

Nice choice, Gil.

I can't wait to give him a standing ovation when he returns to Wrigley Saturday. Nevermind that the Braves series starts Friday. I am going to STAND AND CLAP

He, above anyone else, is deserving of it.  Cheer on.

I was joking. If he gets in the game and gets his standing O on Friday, then that's that in my book.

You'll stop rooting for the Cubs?

I'll not start rooting for the Braves.

Don't root for the Braves, but at least give Lee a bit of a cheer.  He's more than deserving of it.  Moreso than DeRosa.

Will a golf clap suffice? I like the guy but I'd feel really retarded standing up cheering for a dude who plays for the Braves. I'd cheer Kerry Wood if he were on the Cardinals but I just feel better about him because he came up through the Cubs' system, was a Cub during their finest hours, such as they were and we just went through so many highs and lows with that guy it's unbelievable. D. Lee was a good player here. I will always like him but it's just this year's team that has completely bummed me out. God knows I tried to bring the positive but they just wouldn't let me. So no, I'm not going to go apey for Lee unless Saturday is his debut with Atlanta for some reason. If it is, I'll whip out my junk and stroke it and yell YAAYAYAYAYAYAYAYADEEEEERRIIIIIIIIICCCC I LOOOOOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. And I'll salute the Greg Maddux flag and get a Dale Murphy tattoo as soon as I get out of jail. Go Braves.

I hope Lee's back rips in two and he's forced to stare in agony as his leg-having half trots away from his now legless torso as Dale Murphy, Darrell Evans and Steve Bedrosian have a lemon party in the corner.

Fuck Atlanta. Fuck Lee.

Fuck the Cubs.

Slaky's major complaint with Lee is he once indicated that he didn't like it when the fans booed him.  If only he'd been more like Milton Bradley, Slak might have embraced him.

Sweet. That totally overrides the fact that the guy has the 5th best OPS+ among all Cub players with 4000 PAs with the team.

I embraced him plenty. He's not a Cub anymore. May he rot.

Slak's just pissed that he bought all these shirts only to find out that Lee's daughter was totally faking it the whole time.

He's just acting tough to make sure his internet personality matches his ruggedly handsome features. That beard hides so much inner pain, and all.

It's true. The little guy who used to love the Cubs is all but dead. It's torture.

Fuck everything about the Cubs except Eli's fecal league updates and Starlin.