Single Greatest Thread Ever

[J. Walter Weatherman]

DPD.  I was looking at Baseball Reference's 2013 Cubs page and the following is a list of players who actually played for them last year that I have zero memory of:

OF Julio Borbon
OF Dave Sappelt
IF Alberto Gonzalez
OF Cole Gillespie
C J.C. Boscan
LF Thomas Neal
P Kameron Loe
P Eduardo Sanchez
P Henry Rodriguez
P Chang-Yong Lim

I'm pretty sure every one of these men is now dead.  RIP.

That's why this season has been enjoyable. It's night and day between this year and last. Goddamn it I love when a plan starts comin together.

I'm going to have the theme from "The A-Team" playing in my head for the rest of the season.

[Brownie]

Don't we all, Slak?

[PenFoe]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

[SKO]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

[PenFoe]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

[PenFoe]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

[InternetApex]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

[PenFoe]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

[PenFoe]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

Schierholtz indeed.

Later on, butthole.

[Tony]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

Schierholtz indeed.

Later on, butthole.

So I'm late for my flight out of Denver and the only way I'm going to make it through security in time is to go through the "premium member" or whatever line that is really short because only rich people can afford those tickets. I end up next to a guy with a shaved head and a beard as we're taking our belts and shoes off. I have always said that Nate Schierholtz was the most forgettable Cub I had seen play, and that I wouldn't recognize him if he walked into my apartment. He had a look on his face that said "please don't let this idiot in a Cubs hat recognize me" so of course I asked him if he was who I thought he was. Then I felt bad that he was at the airport because he just got fired and the last thing you want is to be recognized as the guy that just got fired. Especially as your awkwardly walking around in your socks on a dirty airport floor. So I said something stupid about hearing that he was released and that sucks and thanked him for being a solid player for "us" and asked him if he had news about being picked up. He told me he wouldn't know for a few days and then I wished him luck as I put my belt back on and ran off to my gate. He was a nice guy.

[Quality Start Machine]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

Schierholtz indeed.

Later on, butthole.

So I'm late for my flight out of Denver and the only way I'm going to make it through security in time is to go through the "premium member" or whatever line that is really short because only rich people can afford those tickets. I end up next to a guy with a shaved head and a beard as we're taking our belts and shoes off. I have always said that Nate Schierholtz was the most forgettable Cub I had seen play, and that I wouldn't recognize him if he walked into my apartment. He had a look on his face that said "please don't let this idiot in a Cubs hat recognize me" so of course I asked him if he was who I thought he was. Then I felt bad that he was at the airport because he just got fired and the last thing you want is to be recognized as the guy that just got fired. Especially as your awkwardly walking around in your socks on a dirty airport floor. So I said something stupid about hearing that he was released and that sucks and thanked him for being a solid player for "us" and asked him if he had news about being picked up. He told me he wouldn't know for a few days and then I wished him luck as I put my belt back on and ran off to my gate. He was a nice guy.

You should have asked him if Baez is a nice guy.

[SKO]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

Schierholtz indeed.

Later on, butthole.

So I'm late for my flight out of Denver and the only way I'm going to make it through security in time is to go through the "premium member" or whatever line that is really short because only rich people can afford those tickets. I end up next to a guy with a shaved head and a beard as we're taking our belts and shoes off. I have always said that Nate Schierholtz was the most forgettable Cub I had seen play, and that I wouldn't recognize him if he walked into my apartment. He had a look on his face that said "please don't let this idiot in a Cubs hat recognize me" so of course I asked him if he was who I thought he was. Then I felt bad that he was at the airport because he just got fired and the last thing you want is to be recognized as the guy that just got fired. Especially as your awkwardly walking around in your socks on a dirty airport floor. So I said something stupid about hearing that he was released and that sucks and thanked him for being a solid player for "us" and asked him if he had news about being picked up. He told me he wouldn't know for a few days and then I wished him luck as I put my belt back on and ran off to my gate. He was a nice guy.

Sucker. Takes me way less time to get through security.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

So I'm late for my flight out of Denver and the only way I'm going to make it through security in time is to go through the "premium member" or whatever line that is really short because only rich people can afford those tickets. I end up next to a guy with a shaved head and a beard as we're taking our belts and shoes off. I have always said that Nate Schierholtz was the most forgettable Cub I had seen play, and that I wouldn't recognize him if he walked into my apartment. He had a look on his face that said "please don't let this idiot in a Cubs hat recognize me" so of course I asked him if he was who I thought he was. Then I felt bad that he was at the airport because he just got fired and the last thing you want is to be recognized as the guy that just got fired. Especially as your awkwardly walking around in your socks on a dirty airport floor. So I said something stupid about hearing that he was released and that sucks and thanked him for being a solid player for "us" and asked him if he had news about being picked up. He told me he wouldn't know for a few days and then I wished him luck as I put my belt back on and ran off to my gate. He was a nice guy.

You should have asked him if Baez is a nice guy.

Intrepid Reader: Gil Gunderson

"Should have snuck a pic of his wife's ass."

[CBStew]

Cubs currently have 39 guys on the 40-man roster. 
When Baez gets officially called up today, that makes 40. 

Today is also Fujikawa's last day on the 60-day DL before they have to make a decision whether to put him back on the 40-man.

So, point is - SOMEONE is getting DFA'd today or getting exposed to the Rule V draft. 

Most likely candidates from the 40-man:
Chris Rusin
Ryan Sweeney
Josh Vitters (who I actually think would probably get claimed in the Rule V)
Brett Jackson
Nate Schierholtz

Those are my best guesses.

Just priming this thread for a possible new member later today.

I checked B-R to see what Vitters was doing in Iowa and saw that in his brief cup of coffee with the Cubs a few years ago he managed an OPS+ of 7. I laughed. /end story.

In 109 PA, which is not exactly a vanishingly small sample size.

33 K, 7 BB.

He has actually been pretty decent the last couple of weeks in Iowa, but if they don't send him to the Marlins for Jacob Turner they need to be prepared for someone to take him in the the Rule V draft.

Which is probably a big "who cares" except that he's only 24, so maybe there's still a chance. 

DPD.

We've got Lake in the lineup today AND Fujikawa is supposedly at Coors Field.

Meaning, we're looking at probably the end of BOTH the Sweeney and Rusin eras. 

Intrepid Reader: cubfaninhydepark

Epstink is terrible.

Meh...whole lotta nothing.

Blake Parker gets sent down (again) for Baez.
Fujikawa not getting activated today.

If it happens tomorrow, which is likely since he's here, then someone will have to get DFA'd.

Internet thinking is that it's most likely Jimmy Butthole Thunder Nate Schierholtz.

Schierholtz indeed.

Later on, butthole.

So I'm late for my flight out of Denver and the only way I'm going to make it through security in time is to go through the "premium member" or whatever line that is really short because only rich people can afford those tickets. I end up next to a guy with a shaved head and a beard as we're taking our belts and shoes off. I have always said that Nate Schierholtz was the most forgettable Cub I had seen play, and that I wouldn't recognize him if he walked into my apartment. He had a look on his face that said "please don't let this idiot in a Cubs hat recognize me" so of course I asked him if he was who I thought he was. Then I felt bad that he was at the airport because he just got fired and the last thing you want is to be recognized as the guy that just got fired. Especially as your awkwardly walking around in your socks on a dirty airport floor. So I said something stupid about hearing that he was released and that sucks and thanked him for being a solid player for "us" and asked him if he had news about being picked up. He told me he wouldn't know for a few days and then I wished him luck as I put my belt back on and ran off to my gate. He was a nice guy.

Sucker. Takes me way less time to get through security.

It is kind of insulting for me to go through security.  They think that I am too old to be a terrorist, so I don't have to take anything off.