Ted Lilly. A Cub.

[Dave B]

Here's The Genius' take on the paly in Houston in April:

Cooper declined to discuss the incident. But Cardinals manager Tony La Russa issued a warning to Towles earlier in the day before the incident between Pujols and Backe. In Monday's game, Towles was involved in a home-plate collision with Troy Glaus in the ninth inning.

"I thought Albert did a fantastic job sliding to take his legs out," La Russa said. "The kid is not giving anybody room to slide, so that's what we teach. He's going to get blasted one of these days"."

[Jon]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

If they come up and in on one guy tonight Pujols needs to take one in the dome. I know he'll just up his HGH dosage to get back into the line-up quicker but Piniella needs to go right to the nuclear option if LaRussa decides to dust somebody.

Harden got any history of drilling dudes?

If so, Yeti has a pill for him...

[Thrillho]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

[Taylor2]

http://chicago.cubs.mlb.com/news/gameday_recap.jsp?ymd=20080910&content_id=3451853&vkey=recap&fext=.jsp&c_id=chc

Ted claims he didn't hear 100 year old Lou say to go out and kick some ass.

On Tuesday, Piniella had said the Cubs needed to be more aggressive and kick some butt. Did Lilly hear his manager's tirade?

"No, I wasn't [aware of it]," Lilly said. "I have no idea what he said, honestly."

So it wasn't discussed among the players?

"He was upset with our team?" Lilly asked. "He might be over 100, but he still has a lot of fire in him. He hasn't lost that, especially when we're losing tough games. That's going to tick him off. I don't hold that against him. The guys know we've got to win. We've got to find ways to win."

One hundred years old?

"He looks pretty good," Lilly said with a smile.

I wonder what damage he would have done to the rest of the Tards if he did hear it.

His teammates didn't say anything when Lilly came into the dugout. Soriano's reaction?

"Surprised," Soriano said. "You never know what Lilly's doing. I don't know what he has in his mind. Thank God, he didn't hurt himself. I think that's the key of the game tonight."

[Jon]

http://chicago.cubs.mlb.com/news/gameday_recap.jsp?ymd=20080910&content_id=3451853&vkey=recap&fext=.jsp&c_id=chc

Ted claims he didn't hear 100 year old Lou say to go out and kick some ass.

On Tuesday, Piniella had said the Cubs needed to be more aggressive and kick some butt. Did Lilly hear his manager's tirade?

"No, I wasn't [aware of it]," Lilly said. "I have no idea what he said, honestly."

So it wasn't discussed among the players?

"He was upset with our team?" Lilly asked. "He might be over 100, but he still has a lot of fire in him. He hasn't lost that, especially when we're losing tough games. That's going to tick him off. I don't hold that against him. The guys know we've got to win. We've got to find ways to win."

One hundred years old?

"He looks pretty good," Lilly said with a smile.

I wonder what damage he would have done to the rest of the Tards if he did hear it.

I wonder how hard it would have been to find piano wire and quicklime in the St. Louis area for the next few days afterwards.

[Mike Douche]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

[Kerm]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

[Quality Start Machine]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

[Mike Douche]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

1 pitch.

Perfection.

[Jon]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

[Uncouth Sloth]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

As long as the Greenberg's still played for the Cubs, I'd watch it.

[Thrillho]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

I put it to you: 40 Greenbergs or 40 Theriots... Pick your horse.

[Jon]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

I put it to you: 40 Greenbergs or 40 Theriots... Pick your horse.

I imagine the 40 Greenbergs would be no fun to watch, and...upon reflection, the game would be called in the first inning after the entire roster suffered season-ending injuries (but scoring 10 runs in the process)

[Kerm]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

I put it to you: 40 Greenbergs or 40 Theriots... Pick your horse.

I imagine the 40 Greenbergs would be no fun to watch, and...upon reflection, the game would be called in the first inning after the entire roster suffered season-ending injuries (but scoring 10 runs in the process)

Wouldn't they score 22 runs?

[Jon]

Great, let's see him throw at one of our guys' hands and knock him out for the year. That'd be swell.

Sounds like as good a time as any to offer Dubois, Fox and SAM FULD their September cups of coffee.

Too bad Moonlight Greenberg is no longer in the organization.

Yeah, too bad.  He had that one great plate appearance.

1.000 OBP, Ogden!

My Laptop science says that a team of Greenberg's would score an infinite amount of runs. Unfortunately, the game of baseball as we know it would collapse, as the first inning of the first game they ever played would never end.

I put it to you: 40 Greenbergs or 40 Theriots... Pick your horse.

I imagine the 40 Greenbergs would be no fun to watch, and...upon reflection, the game would be called in the first inning after the entire roster suffered season-ending injuries (but scoring 10 runs in the process)

Wouldn't they score 22 runs?

This is the 40-man roster.

EDIT: wait...I failed to take pinch running into account...I doubt the rules cover what happens when no on is left to run.