Opening. Day. Female. Odges.

[Saul Goodman]

this weather can blow me

At about 18 mph out of the southwest.

I laughed.

[Tonker]

Sometimes I think "Meh. The Cubs have spent next-to-nothing this offseason; there are holes in the outfield, and in the middle infield, and in the pen and maybe at backup catcher; the players have got fat (and not just BMIaez) and happy and they don't really want it any more; Joe's schtick is wearing seriously thin and he's probably only got this one more season in him so if it doesn't start well it sure as hell won't end well; and the Tards picked up a couple of nice players and will probably be better this year than they were last."

But then I think "OPENING MOTHERFUCKING DAY YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!", and I get a bit of a chub and I love the Cubs all over again,  and everything's all right with the World.

So.

Opening.  Motherfucking.  Day.  Fuck St. L*uis, fuck the D*odgers, fuck the M*ts, fuck that fat fuck Jesus Aguilar.  Go Cubs.

[Quality Start Machine]

I'm here for Kris Bryant making every team the Cubs face feel the wrath of Gord.

[Saul Goodman]

First Cubs HR of 2019: I'm going with Willson Contreras.

[Saul Goodman]

First Cubs HR of 2019: I’m going with Willson Contreras.

Happy to be DOUBLE FACED thanks to El Mago.