"Turd Throw" and other stories from the rancid NLC.

[Slaky+]

If someone can explain to me why having enough money to afford a home, decent clothes and baseball tickets is a bad thing...I'd love to understand that one.

[Kwyjibo]

If someone can explain to me why having enough money to afford a home, decent clothes and baseball tickets is a bad thing...I'd love to understand that one.

Because the way to tell a true fan is to look for the naked homeless people trying to sneak into the park, natch.

[CT II]

If someone can explain to me why having enough money to afford a home, decent clothes and baseball tickets is a bad thing...I'd love to understand that one.

It's not a bad thing, as long as you acheive it through a blue collar job, like digging ditches or shit like that.  Chicago's a blue collar town you know.  I'm pretty sure they just moved the stockyards operations into the Sears Tower.

[Tinker to Evers to Chance]

I see no reason to bring the mascot for the departed Expos orginization into this.  Also, the fans were in the game last Wednesday, for example and standing for the third out of the first (and it got better from there) with no "clap signs" no jumbotrons etc.  The "beer garden with baseball" stereotype is dead as, well, Milwaukee.

There was also a standing ovation when the Ass Trolls tied the Brewers.  I've never been to a game with an atmosphere like that.

[DPappy]

A couple of stories from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinal

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=665342

You hate the Cubs because they're from Chicago, period. No other excuses needed. But, just in case, you hate them even more when they start pulling out games in the ninth inning and you watch and hear those Wrigley Field fans who have suddenly put down their cell phones and covered up their tank tops and roar for - good grief, can there be any nickname in baseball lamer than this - the "Cubbies."

So what if they've waited around a century for another World Series title in Yuppieville, Wrigleyville or whatever they call that neighborhood of bars and a ballpark on Chicago's north side.

He's a little testy, isn't he?

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=665348

An MRI performed in Milwaukee revealed Sheets has a slight strain of his left hamstring. The Brewers held off scratching Sheets from his scheduled turn Sunday against Atlanta, but it is doubtful he will make that start.

Depending on how quickly he recovers, Sheets might not pitch again this season, which would be a severe blow to the Brewers' chances of overtaking the Chicago Cubs and winning the National League Central title. Beyond the start against the Braves, he was scheduled to pitch the second game of the season-ending home series against San Diego.

Oh, the irony.  Someone needs to remind this douchebag that for the past 10 years, the most excitement displayed by the fans at a Brewers game is shown during the Sausage Race and when they play Roll Out the Barrel during the 7th inning stretch.

[RV]

If someone can explain to me why having enough money to afford a home, decent clothes and baseball tickets is a bad thing...I'd love to understand that one.

It's not a bad thing, as long as you acheive it through a blue collar job, like digging ditches or shit like that.  Chicago's a blue collar town you know.  I'm pretty sure they just moved the stockyards operations into the Sears Tower.

I hear ya man. After a long day down at the foundry, I like nothing more than watching the local sports teams in my recliner with a nice deep dish pizza (stuffed with meatballs) and a Hamm's. Working class stiffs like Jim Belushi and Mike North know what I'm talking about.

[Internet Apex]

A couple of stories from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinal

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=665342

You hate the Cubs because they're from Chicago, period. No other excuses needed. But, just in case, you hate them even more when they start pulling out games in the ninth inning and you watch and hear those Wrigley Field fans who have suddenly put down their cell phones and covered up their tank tops and roar for - good grief, can there be any nickname in baseball lamer than this - the "Cubbies."

So what if they've waited around a century for another World Series title in Yuppieville, Wrigleyville or whatever they call that neighborhood of bars and a ballpark on Chicago's north side.

He's a little testy, isn't he?

http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=665348

An MRI performed in Milwaukee revealed Sheets has a slight strain of his left hamstring. The Brewers held off scratching Sheets from his scheduled turn Sunday against Atlanta, but it is doubtful he will make that start.

Depending on how quickly he recovers, Sheets might not pitch again this season, which would be a severe blow to the Brewers' chances of overtaking the Chicago Cubs and winning the National League Central title. Beyond the start against the Braves, he was scheduled to pitch the second game of the season-ending home series against San Diego.

I used to be kind of offended about the whole "Yuppie" tag laid on Cubs fans by Sox fans and other ignorant slimeballs. Especially since most of the Cubs fans I knew were from Central and Northern Indiana which can't get any more hick or blue collar in most parts. Yuppie? Do they even watch baseball? They like soccer right?

Well now I'm up here on the Northside myself and I find the whole idea completely ridiculous and in fact, absolutely hilarious. Sure, Wrigleyville and Southport and the near Northside is pretty upscale, got its Chads and Trixies prancing about gheyley but outside of that this whole Northside is rife with bums and filth and dogs and shit just like any other big city. There's people from all walks of life sporting Cubs hats up here and most of them are sitting at the bus stop looking like they don't have two dimes to rub together.

Yuppies? Yeah. Foreigners? Yeah. Bums? Yeah. Everybody else? Yeah, we all heart the Cubs.

So suck it.

[Kwyjibo]

Well now I'm up here on the Northside myself and I find the whole idea completely ridiculous and in fact, absolutely hilarious. Sure, Wrigleyville and Southport and the near Northside is pretty upscale, got its Chads and Trixies prancing about gheyley but outside of that this whole Northside is rife with bums and filth and dogs and shit just like any other big city. There's people from all walks of life sporting Cubs hats up here and most of them are sitting at the bus stop looking like they don't have two dimes to rub together.

Yuppies? Yeah. Foreigners? Yeah. Bums? Yeah. Everybody else? Yeah, we all heart the Cubs.

So suck it.

Yeah, once Chad and Trixie have their little yuppie larvae, they move to Evanston. There's people with all kinds of Cubs hats & shirts. It's all good.

Fuck the Brewers and their fans.

Fuck Wisconsin. Once you're north of the Cheddar Curtain, it's all fucking Siberia anyway.

[Dave B]

Bottom line: if the Brewers owner didn't stage a bloodless coup and take over the Commisioner's job, didn't move the Brewers to the NL Central, and if tens of thousands of Cubs fans don't make the trek north to subsidize their rotting franchise, there is no Miller Park and no MLB franchise in Milwaukee.

[TJ]

I really can understand the enmity Wisconsinites have for Chicago.

Let's start with the big, bad Bears. After all, if it weren't for that terrible George Halas, the Green Bay Packers would have probably relocated to Milwaukee or Minneapolis in the 30s or 40s. ANd then they'd probably be in San Antonio or Los Angeles.

Let's continue with Bill Veeck, who owned the minor league Brewers in the 40s and 50s and attempted to move the St. Louis Browns up to Milwaukee. Those awful Chicago people. Screw the FIBs!

Then John Allyn, the Sox owner, was interested in uprooting the Meth Sox and taking them to Milwaukee. He even played a dozen home games a year in County Stadium in 1968 and 1969 to generate fan support. The fans demonstrated their support, and it made it a hell of a lot easier for our dear commissioner to move the Seattle Pilots there in 1970.

Did you know that Chicago is by far the No. 1 market for Miller products? Did you also know that Chicago is one of the top customers of Harley Davidson bikes?

What else is a top industry in Wisconsin?

Accounting for nearly $13 billion in travel expenditures per year,  Wisconsin's tourism industry is one of the state's top three industries along with manufacturing and agriculture.

Now from where do all these tourists come? At least 25% come from Illinois. So assholes like you and me give Wisconsin about $3.25 billion. That's enough to buy and sell the Cubs almost 4 times.

So, yeah, I can see where all this enmity is coming from.

[Internet Apex]

Well, truth be told, most Chicagoans are insufferable pricks. That might not go over so well in parts north or south. You get used to assbaggery when you're surrounded by it, but when its trampling all over your garden, you tend to feel a bit less welcoming of it..

[Kwyjibo]

Well, truth be told, most Chicagoans are insufferable pricks. That might not go over so well in parts north or south. You get used to assbaggery when you're surrounded by it, but when its trampling all over your garden, you tend to feel a bit less welcoming of it..

Spend some time in the 212/718/917 area codes, and you'll think Chicago is one big fucking shirtless hug.

[helloWorld]

You hate the Cubs because they're from Chicago, period. No other excuses needed. But, just in case, you hate them even more when they start pulling out games in the ninth inning and you watch and hear those Wrigley Field fans who have suddenly put down their cell phones and covered up their tank tops and roar for - good grief, can there be any nickname in baseball lamer than this - the "Cubbies."

So what if they've waited around a century for another World Series title in Yuppieville, Wrigleyville or whatever they call that neighborhood of bars and a ballpark on Chicago's north side.

Jealousy is a stinky cologne.

It's a formidable scent. It stings the nostrils. Honestly, it smells like pure gasoline.

Here's hoping that Yost continues to encourage his bullpen to light themselves on fire.

[Internet Apex]

Well, truth be told, most Chicagoans are insufferable pricks. That might not go over so well in parts north or south. You get used to assbaggery when you're surrounded by it, but when its trampling all over your garden, you tend to feel a bit less welcoming of it..

Spend some time in the 212/718/917 area codes, and you'll think Chicago is one big fucking shirtless hug.

Heh heh heh... I'm just funnin' youse guys and waiting for a heated rejoinder from Huey explaining why the concepts of customer service, defensive driving and saying "hello" and "excuse me" to complete strangers are teh fucken ghey.

[CT II]

Well, truth be told, most Chicagoans are insufferable pricks. That might not go over so well in parts north or south. You get used to assbaggery when you're surrounded by it, but when its trampling all over your garden, you tend to feel a bit less welcoming of it..

Spend some time in the 212/718/917 area codes, and you'll think Chicago is one big fucking shirtless hug.

Heh heh heh... I'm just funnin' youse guys and waiting for a heated rejoinder from Huey explaining why the concepts of customer service, defensive driving and saying "hello" and "excuse me" to complete strangers are teh fucken ghey.

I always say "excuse me" as I shoulder past a bunch of fat Iowans who are walking 4 across on the sidewalk while they gape at the big buildings.  Because, I know it's a hell of a city, those buildings are outstanding works of architecture, and they should be gaped at.

But, I will never say "excuse me" to the idiots who stop in the middle of the Michigan Avenue bridge at lunchtime and expect you to wait while they take a picture.  Fuck that noise.