"Turd Throw" and other stories from the rancid NLC.

[air2300]

Cordero finishes his pants shitting, Brewers lose 6-5.

Fuck yea.  Now the Cubs have to go out there and get the job done and sweep the tards.  

[Down In Front]

Cordero finishes his pants shitting, Brewers lose 6-5.

I won't mention who had the winning run, but I just VORPed in my mouth a little.  The wheels seem to be falling off the Brewers wagon.

Naw.  I saw enough in late June to tell me they’re not going away anytime soon.  Cubs are better, Cubs should BEAT them, but I don’t see ‘em dying now.  The Reds always do that to teams.  Do I need to remind anyone of 2004?  I’m already nervous about the Cubs having to play those retarded, bad, ugly but always-hot-it-seems-when-they-play-you assholes next.

[Shooter]

Cordero finishes his pants shitting, Brewers lose 6-5.

I won't mention who had the winning run, but I just VORPed in my mouth a little.  The wheels seem to be falling off the Brewers wagon.

Naw.  I saw enough in late June to tell me they’re not going away anytime soon.  Cubs are better, Cubs should BEAT them, but I don’t see ‘em dying now.  The Reds always do that to teams.  Do I need to remind anyone of 2004?  I’m already nervous about the Cubs having to play those retarded, bad, ugly but always-hot-it-seems-when-they-play-you assholes next.

At least Glendong won't be there to serve up gopher balls to Bronson Arroyo.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. Fuck it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at fucking Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

[Fork_The_Third]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

[Down In Front]

I'm not even thinking of how much fun it would be to openly mock people I know who are Cardinal fans.

[CT II]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

Wait, so you work on a chain gang?

[Fork_The_Third]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

Wait, so you work on a chain gang?

Those potholes don't fix themselves, you know.

[CT II]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

Wait, so you work on a chain gang?

Those potholes don't fix themselves, you know.

Wait, you mean potholes sometimes get fixed?

[Fork_The_Third]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

Wait, so you work on a chain gang?

Those potholes don't fix themselves, you know.

Wait, you mean potholes sometimes get fixed?

You should see the hole for pot we did in Barrington

[Down In Front]

Just think, if, no when the Cubs sweep the Tardbirds that'll mean at least a tie for 1st place at the end of the weekend since The Spew Crew are still on the road for 4 more which'll mean at least 2 losses. f@#$ it, I'm giving them too much credit. The just lost 3 of 4 at f@#$ing Cincy. As much as I hate to say it, let's just send Milwaukee on it's way with the Tards sweeping 4 and they'll really start that death-spiral from the top of the division. I promise that this is about the only time you'll ever hear me saying that I want the Tards to sweep or even win a game.

I'm not even thinking about stopping at Home Depot in the morning to pick up a blue broom to put into the Cards' fan's cube at work - to match the ones in the Sux fans' cubes from earlier this summer.

Wait, so you work on a chain gang?

Those potholes don't fix themselves, you know.

Wait, you mean potholes sometimes get fixed?

You should see the hole for pot we did in Barrington

Dang.  I's a call you butter cuz you on a roll today. 

Way to tie in TWO threads together.  If JD were still alive, he'd be so proud.

[EG]

The sad thing about all of this is that the Cardinals could be tied for first in the loss column by the time this week is over if everything breaks right for them. They would need to sweep the three-game series against the Cubs and the four-game series against the Brewers with the Brew Crew also losing their games this week before playing the Cards and have the Cubs lose at least one game at Cincy.

This is one of your five most convoluted passages ever.

[CT II]

The sad thing about all of this is that the Cardinals could be tied for first in the loss column by the time this week is over if everything breaks right for them. They would need to sweep the three-game series against the Cubs and the four-game series against the Brewers with the Brew Crew also losing their games this week before playing the Cards and have the Cubs lose at least one game at Cincy.

This is one of your five most convoluted passages ever.

Awesome, you're back.  You were gone for the move, right?  Seems like BC's been running around here unchecked for a couple of days now.

[Three times a JD]

If JD were still alive, he'd be so proud.

JD's with Mr. Speed right now.  Out of the high-traffic loop, but he misses everyone.  He's planning a comeback in September.  Full throttle style.

[EG]

The sad thing about all of this is that the Cardinals could be tied for first in the loss column by the time this week is over if everything breaks right for them. They would need to sweep the three-game series against the Cubs and the four-game series against the Brewers with the Brew Crew also losing their games this week before playing the Cards and have the Cubs lose at least one game at Cincy.

This is one of your five most convoluted passages ever.

Awesome, you're back.  You were gone for the move, right?  Seems like BC's been running around here unchecked for a couple of days now.

It's so nice to be noticed.  Yes, I was gone for the move.  I'm back now, so I'll resume my position of criticizing BC at least once a day.