"Turd Throw" and other stories from the rancid NLC.

[Kermit]

You know what though, it's still better than the alternative.

Yes, they're ordinary; probably more ordinary than the '98 Cubs.  Yes, at this rate, they'll get run out of the playoffs quicker than a Daryle Ward tenure on the basepaths.  Yes it's embarassing to maybe have to back in to one of the worst divisions ever.

But you know what's worse?  For me, at least, times like last year, when the division was just as shitty and the Cubs weren't even in it.  To flip through the channels in mid-September and stop on the Cubs game and watch Jock Jones flail away in a meaningless game, your bloid angering up with rage at yet another in a long, long line of seasons that were rendered moot by July, and that these assmunches who no longer give a fuck because they're out if it get to play ball in the sun and continue not giving a fuck.

This is painful.  Times like last night can make it hard to get to sleep on time.  You hate yourself for being so passionately involved with a bunch of jerkoffs over whom you have no control, and yet you're allowing them to dictate your happiness and anger, but it passes.  It always passes.  Unless you live at NSBB, I suppose.  Like I said earlier, we've lived through worse.  If they miss the playoffs we will really, really hate this team and will resume our offseason gnashing of teeth over how fucking angry we are at carrying a 99 year burden.  Until that happens, we just have to keep watching.

/end rant.

JD, we're changing the name of our blog to Bloid Cubbie Blue.

I bet that's what you call Zoidberg's blood.

[Taylor]

These are the times that try men's souls.

[Kwyjibo]

These are the times that try men's souls.

Taft will beat Bakersfield.

[Indolent Reader]

The Best of Times.

Nice reference.

The Blurst of Times?!

[CT II]

The Best of Times.

Nice reference.

The Blurst of Times?!

Stupid monkey.

[EG]

... yet you're allowing them to dictate your happiness and anger

Move farther away from Chicago.  It helps a lot.

[LoneStarCubFan]

$#%@!  I can't believe I kept watching this shit.

It's at times like these that I remind myself of Brant Brown's miss, how I nearly drove off the inbound Stevenson on my way home from work while listening to it as it happened, and that I still managed to wake up and work the next day.

Hell, we lived through the morning after Game 7 in '03, which was on the heels of a drawn-out, 24-hour nut-stomping.

This?  This ain't shit.  These cunts wanna hurt me, they'll have to try a bit harder.  Walk and walkoff triple.   Pfffffffft.  Big fucking deal. 

Fuck you Dempster, you're a loser, and I get to go to bed tonight with my beautiful wife and wake up to my beautiful daughter, and you'll wake up the same, worthless loser that you've always been.  You, too, Marquis, you 5-inning schlub.  I'll be damned if I let you two clowns ruin my days.  I lived through Brant Brown, motherfuckers.

Fuck you.

Your hatred is misdirected. Last night is on the hitters, not the pitchers. Biggest collection of sackless fucks in professional baseball. They should be ripping into the suck-ass Astros staff and they don't have the balls to do it.

I said this a week or so ago and I'll say it again. They're going to win just enough games down the stretch to lose the division by one game to Milwaukee.

[Taylor]

$#%@!  I can't believe I kept watching this shit.

It's at times like these that I remind myself of Brant Brown's miss, how I nearly drove off the inbound Stevenson on my way home from work while listening to it as it happened, and that I still managed to wake up and work the next day.

Hell, we lived through the morning after Game 7 in '03, which was on the heels of a drawn-out, 24-hour nut-stomping.

This?  This ain't shit.  These cunts wanna hurt me, they'll have to try a bit harder.  Walk and walkoff triple.   Pfffffffft.  Big fucking deal. 

Fuck you Dempster, you're a loser, and I get to go to bed tonight with my beautiful wife and wake up to my beautiful daughter, and you'll wake up the same, worthless loser that you've always been.  You, too, Marquis, you 5-inning schlub.  I'll be damned if I let you two clowns ruin my days.  I lived through Brant Brown, motherfuckers.

Fuck you.

Your hatred is misdirected. Last night is on the hitters, not the pitchers. Biggest collection of sackless fucks in professional baseball. They should be ripping into the suck-ass Astros staff and they don't have the balls to do it.

I said this a week or so ago and I'll say it again. They're going to win just enough games down the stretch to lose the division by one game to Milwaukee.

Some of it should be directed towards Marquis who had a 4-1 lead and pissed it away. He got himself out of some trouble early on, but in the 5th and 6th it looked like he was lobbing softballs up there.

[LoneStarCubFan]

$#%@!  I can't believe I kept watching this shit.

It's at times like these that I remind myself of Brant Brown's miss, how I nearly drove off the inbound Stevenson on my way home from work while listening to it as it happened, and that I still managed to wake up and work the next day.

Hell, we lived through the morning after Game 7 in '03, which was on the heels of a drawn-out, 24-hour nut-stomping.

This?  This ain't shit.  These cunts wanna hurt me, they'll have to try a bit harder.  Walk and walkoff triple.   Pfffffffft.  Big fucking deal. 

Fuck you Dempster, you're a loser, and I get to go to bed tonight with my beautiful wife and wake up to my beautiful daughter, and you'll wake up the same, worthless loser that you've always been.  You, too, Marquis, you 5-inning schlub.  I'll be damned if I let you two clowns ruin my days.  I lived through Brant Brown, motherfuckers.

Fuck you.

Your hatred is misdirected. Last night is on the hitters, not the pitchers. Biggest collection of sackless fucks in professional baseball. They should be ripping into the suck-ass Astros staff and they don't have the balls to do it.

I said this a week or so ago and I'll say it again. They're going to win just enough games down the stretch to lose the division by one game to Milwaukee.

Some of it should be directed towards Marquis who had a 4-1 lead and pissed it away. He got himself out of some trouble early on, but in the 5th and 6th it looked like he was lobbing softballs up there.

Four runs in six innings in that abortion of ballpark isn't too bad.

And he didn't walk 14 guys like the Astros pitchers did. If our hitters had any fucking sack they would have won about 13-4 and nobody would be talking about Marquis.

[Down In Front]

First of all it was 5 innings, not 6.  He made it into the 6th, whoop-de-damn-fucking doo, let's throw him a goddamn parade, even
though he failed to get a single out in that 6th inning.   If it weren’t for the Marmot, he would have given up more runs.  Hell, as it was, Marquis was on pace to give up over 7 runs for the game, which would mean if some of those hitters “sacked up” as you put it (because, you know, it’s a sign of how unmanly these guys are when they fail to hit a 500 foot homer with guys on base), they would have needed 8 runs to win.

Fuck Marquis and his sally-assed 5 inning outings.  Now is the time for everyone to step up, not just the hitters.

Besides, I thought you stopped watcing these gutless cocksuckers.

[EG]

Fuck Marquis and his sally-assed 5 inning outings.  Now is the time for everyone to step up, not just the hitters. we can just sit back and watch him do this for two more years, at $7 million per.

Hendry'd.

[Lance Dicksons Arm]

3-0 Pirates, with them still threatening in the 3rd.  Dave Bush is getting abused again.

[Slaky+]

3-0 Pirates, with them still threatening in the 3rd.  Dave Bush is getting abused again.

Didn't know he was Catholic.

[Kwyjibo]

4-0 Bucs, top 4th.

[Internet Apex]

Rickie Weeks up with two outs and 2 RISP bottom seven verses Soria.

Let's see if he can sack up.

Ball one blocked.
Called strike 1-1.
Foul 1-2. Late lunge swing.
Ball outside 2-2.
Strike three called on the inside corner.

End of inning.

0 R 1 H 0 E 2 LOB.

After 6.5. Pissburgh 4, Milwaukee 2.