"Turd Throw" and other stories from the rancid NLC.

[SKO]

LOL at the Reds trying and failing to trade Bruce for absolutely nothing.

Link?

http://sports.yahoo.com/news/sources--jay-bruce-trade-to-blue-jays-unravels-055142108.html

Supposedly the second time they've tried and failed to trade Bruce to the Blue Jays as part of a three team deal. Why the Blue Jays want another poor defender whose only remaining talent is decent power is beyond me, but still the Reds were going to dump him for either shitty Blue Jays prospects or shitty prospects from the Angels, the worst farm system in the majors. Sounds like his value has sunk so low their only real hope is to find someone who'll eat his whole salary.

The only thing that'd make this better would be if JABE ROOS ended up with the White Sox.

I don't think the White Sox have the money to do that, or at least Reinsdorf is pretending they don't have the money to do that. My guess is if they were willing to pay someone 13 million this year they'd already have Fowler.

Stop ruining my delirious fantasy with your "facts".

The sad thing is Bruce would be a substantial upgrade for the White Sox over Garcia. That's the "benefit" of them running out hilariously awful players at SS, 2B, 3B, and RF last year. Other than Frazier they've gotten replacement level or just below major league average players at all of those spots but RF so far this offseason and they all represent upgrades.

[SKO]

Chris Capuano is still in the majors in 2016, and he's back with the Brewers?

[Saul Goodman]

Chris Capuano is still in the majors in 2016, and he's back with the Brewers?

What a time to be alive.

[SKO]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

[Quality Start Machine]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

Well, CFiHP is around here somewhere...

[Eli]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

[SKO]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

I'm guessing it's because the Pirates are definitely the kings of the butthurt HBP retaliation brigade, and Joe has made it very clear he thinks that's dumb as shit. Considering Pirates fans appear to have carried over the blue collar tuffness mentality they earned as Steelers fans, I think they can't stand ol' smarty pants trying gimmicks and making fun of real men.

[SKO]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

DPD, but yeah I've noticed fans were all fine with Joe Maddon when he was with the harmless Rays whom no one gives a shit about, but now that he's leading the Cubs instead of a scrappy underdog he's suddenly an overrated hack with a bunch of gimmicks and nothing else.

[Bort]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

DPD, but yeah I've noticed fans were all fine with Joe Maddon when he was with the harmless Rays whom no one gives a shit about, but now that he's leading the Cubs instead of a scrappy underdog he's suddenly an overrated hack with a bunch of gimmicks and nothing else.

I have a theory that a lot of people are really not cool with the concept of the Cubs being good, because it shatters one of their comfortable illusions. Just like when I was growing up in SC, and we always had Louisiana and Mississippi below us on educational standards, and needed it that way for our own self-image.

[SKO]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

DPD, but yeah I've noticed fans were all fine with Joe Maddon when he was with the harmless Rays whom no one gives a shit about, but now that he's leading the Cubs instead of a scrappy underdog he's suddenly an overrated hack with a bunch of gimmicks and nothing else.

I have a theory that a lot of people are really not cool with the concept of the Cubs being good, because it shatters one of their comfortable illusions. Just like when I was growing up in SC, and we always had Louisiana and Mississippi below us on educational standards, and needed it that way for our own self-image.

Oh yeah, the Cubs never actually winning it all is necessary for most White Sox, Cardinals, and various other fans to keep their perspective. Pittsburgh has been a garbage franchise for most of the last 30 years but Pittsburgh fans my age who weren't even born the last time they won a championship can still make 1908 jokes to take their mind off of the fact that the Cubs came in and pissed all over the tiny window of contention they thought they had.

[Saul Goodman]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

DPD, but yeah I've noticed fans were all fine with Joe Maddon when he was with the harmless Rays whom no one gives a shit about, but now that he's leading the Cubs instead of a scrappy underdog he's suddenly an overrated hack with a bunch of gimmicks and nothing else.

I have a theory that a lot of people are really not cool with the concept of the Cubs being good, because it shatters one of their comfortable illusions. Just like when I was growing up in SC, and we always had Louisiana and Mississippi below us on educational standards, and needed it that way for our own self-image.

Oh yeah, the Cubs never actually winning it all is necessary for most White Sox, Cardinals, and various other fans to keep their perspective. Pittsburgh has been a garbage franchise for most of the last 30 years but Pittsburgh fans my age who weren't even born the last time they won a championship can still make 1908 jokes to take their mind off of the fact that the Cubs came in and pissed all over the tiny window of contention they thought they had.

The Pirates can go fuck themselves for throwing at Jake in the SeligCard Showdown last year. Let's get no-hitter number three tonight, Jake.

[Slaky]

I guess the one thing I don't understand is calling Cubs fans "bandwagoners".

Motherfucker, the team is good once every 10 years and the Big Joke used to be "those morons fill up Wrigley even when the team sucks".

You can't have it both ways.

I went to PNC for a weekend series with my friends back in the Piniella days and we had a great time. Of course there were a few Pirates fans who didn't take too kindly to us and we probably deserved it. But the Cubs have always had good traveling support and PNC happens to be a top 5 destination ballpark in the majors. So that's life. Go back to having a shitty ballpark if you hate it so much.

[SKO]

I guess the one thing I don't understand is calling Cubs fans "bandwagoners".

Motherfucker, the team is good once every 10 years and the Big Joke used to be "those morons fill up Wrigley even when the team sucks".

You can't have it both ways.

I went to PNC for a weekend series with my friends back in the Piniella days and we had a great time. Of course there were a few Pirates fans who didn't take too kindly to us and we probably deserved it. But the Cubs have always had good traveling support and PNC happens to be a top 5 destination ballpark in the majors. So that's life. Go back to having a shitty ballpark if you hate it so much.

Yeah it's the same thing we tell White Sox fans and Thom, if you hate Cubs fans so much fill up your fucking ballpark.

[Oleg]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

I'm a very petty person (get it, Fork?) so I would hate anyone who's really good at their when they do that job for my least favorite team.

[CBStew]

Because I am a horrid troll who likes to see how miserable the Cubs are making life for their opponents, I went to read the Bucs dugout recap of this game and check out the butthurt here:

the Cubs were back in Pittsburgh, and their the blue-jersey-clad fans had popped back out of their hell holes. Before the game they milled about Federal Street, sipping PBR, another thing they totally were just as into five years ago. For sure. Inside PNC Park, the professionals in blue made pests of themselves, too,

Holy shit, does a fucking Pirates fan really want to go with the "their fans only care when the team is good" approach? Where the fuck were Pirates fans before 2013? Hell, where the fuck are Pirates fans now?

They (and fans of most other teams, I'm noticing) also really, really hate Joe Maddon. Which is probably one of those glad-he's-with-us things, because I'm sure we'd all hate his whole shtick if he was managing the Cardinals.

I'm a very petty person (get it, Fork?) so I would hate anyone who's really good at their when they do that job for my least favorite team.

something, something, "the whole their?"