G.I. Joe

[Thrillho]

So, from what I'm hearing, the producers of the upcoming G.I. Joe movie hate America so much that they pray nightly for our troops to lose the greatest war mankind has ever known.

Is this on anybody's radar?

I mean, these homos don't even have the courage to make Destro a Muslim suicide bomber. Does HollyWEIRD's leftist perfidy know no end?

[RV]

My pinko sources in Hollywood tell me the latest draft of the script has Gorbachev as the leader of the multinational fighting force.

Beck also aired a clip from Happy Feet, an animated film about a dancing Emperor penguin, which Beck previously described as an "animated version of An Inconvenient Truth," as Media Matters for America has documented. While showing the Happy Feet clip, Beck stated: "You remember that penguin cartoon? I love that. Look at this clip in the end. Who saves the penguin in the end? Oh, yes. You're about to see it. It's the United Nations. Wow. Believing the United Nations could save anyone takes more imagination than believing penguins can tap dance."

Additionally, Beck criticized the 2006 film Superman Returns, and aired a video clip of Perry White -- editor of the newspaper that Clark Kent, Superman's alter ego, works for -- asking if Superman still stands for "truth, justice, all that stuff." Beck asked: "All that stuff? All that stuff? What the hell happened to 'the American way'?" He continued: "Put aside for a second that they hacked apart one of the greatest taglines in popular culture. I believe there's more to this. I believe some are trying to indoctrinate our kids into hating their own country, turning us into some one-world-government nightmare; hating America, turning it into a dirty word. How will our kids ever have the courage to stand up to their college professors if they've been raised to think that there's something wrong with the American way or the American way never existed?"

http://mediamatters.org/items/200710310008?f=h_latest

[powen01]

So, from what I'm hearing, the producers of the upcoming G.I. Joe movie hate America so much that they pray nightly for our troops to lose the greatest war mankind has ever known.

Is this on anybody's radar?

I mean, these homos don't even have the courage to make Destro a Muslim suicide bomber. Does HollyWEIRD's leftist perfidy know no end?

No, it only gets worse:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jY2ms59gkIU

[MikeC]

You have to admit its pretty dumb to take out references of "Real American Hero," taking a uniquely American reference of "G.I. Joe" and making it not an american based special forces team but an international one based in Europe.

Not only that but GI Joe goes from defending freedom and stopping the terrorists known as Cobra to battling those pesky scottish arms dealers known as Cobra. I guess killing terrorists and defending freedom isn't good enough anymore, not even for GI Joe...."A Real something or other..."

[Chuckosan]

You have to admit its pretty dumb to take out references of "Real American Hero," taking a uniquely American reference of "G.I. Joe" and making it not an american based special forces team but an international one based in Europe.

Not only that but GI Joe goes from defending freedom and stopping the terrorists known as Cobra to battling those pesky scottish arms dealers known as Cobra. I guess killing terrorists and defending freedom isn't good enough anymore, not even for GI Joe...."A Real something or other..."

As GI Joe was gay, clearly not.  We can't have those unsavories protecting us.

[Thrillho]

Not only that but GI Joe goes from defending freedom and stopping the terrorists known as Cobra to battling those that pesky scottish arms dealers known as Cobra Destro, who is in league with the terrorists known as Cobra.

Are you truly this retarded?'d

Time to stop stealing all of your shockingly unique views on the world from right wing jackasses, word-for-motherfucking-word:

And I see we’ve moved from defending human freedom from terrorist organizations to battling those ever pesky Scottish arms dealers. A blurb from the movie site:

Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, and revolves around an international co-ed force of operatives who use high-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer.

The term “G.I. Joe” itself is about as American as you can get but you can see how the acronym’s been changed to suit the film. Again, Hasbro’s defense that the movie simply reflects the 80’s Joe is hogwash. There’s nothing in the history of the Hasbro G.I. Joe line that indicates the term “Global” was ever used until right now.

If you hadn't botched the capitalization of "Scottish," I might even accuse you of copying and pasting.

Maybe you didn't see our ridicule of you before the crash, Mike. Suffice to say: if it weren't rich enough seeing morons get this worked up over a glorified kids' movie, you're also wrong, wrong, wrong.

Since this thread got re-Rattoed, I'll repeat what I posted before, slowly and in words you'll understand...

Blind leading the blind:

As a fan of the classic animated series, I don’t recall Destro being the latest in a long line of Scottish gun runners. Clearly whomever wrote this article knows nothing about GI JOE and just copied off of a press release.

From the comments:

Destro is though, and always has been, a Scottish arms dealer from a long line of Scottish arms dealers, the original selling weapons to both sides during the English civil war if I recall correctly, and being made to wear an iron mask upon being found out, which his family eventually adopted as something of a badge of honour.

If anyone wants more details, you can check out the filecards that came printed on the action figures’ backer cards. The original 1983 filecard mentions his status as an arms dealer who supplies Cobra with weapons, and the wearing of the mask as a family tradition.

http://www.yojoe.com/filecard/83/destro.shtml

The 1988 version mentions how one of his ancestors started the whole mask-wearing custom by being made to wear one by Cromwell’s men for selling arms to both sides during the English civil war, and established his birthplace as Callander, Scotland.

http://www.yojoe.com/filecard/88/destro2.shtml

The 1992 version mentions his ancestral castle “in the grim Scottish highlands” and identifies the pendant he always wears as an “ancient Scottish emblem”, and it just keeps going from there.

http://www.yojoe.com/filecard/92/destro3.shtml

And of course, JMM’s G.I. Joe guide has a full character biography based on the comics.

http://www.myuselessknowledge.com/joe/destro.html

Once again: Oh, how humiliating.

Now more than ever.

Literally.

[MikeC]

If you want to rip apart my quote you might want to get the down low info...

From Variety...(which you even quote 2 paragraphs later)

G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer.

Uhh yeah no where does it say Destro is in league with Cobra, it says he leads them. Cobra is founded and lead by Cobra Commander, Destro is a mercenary or a high ranking general within Cobra who is in love with Cobra's second in command the Baroness. (I can't believe i still remember this crap from the 80's cartoon)

My main gripe is taking a uniquely American Icon as G.I. Joe and making it as un-american as they can go. I grew up with the toys and the cartoon. And what they are making now is nothing like that.

The G.I. Joe toy line is based off real American G.I.'s who are credited with winning WW2. How the makers of the film missed that and have gone from this....

GI Joe is the codename for American's daring, highly trained
special mission force. It's purpose, to defend human freedom against Cobra-
a ruthless, terrorist organization determined to rule the world.

To that Brussels based jerk-off story line is beyond me. If they arent that above qoute then it isnt G.I. Joe.

The 80's version is the version of G.I. Joe everyone wants, everyone expects, and everyone remembers. If it doesnt resemble that then it going to bomb big time.

There was nothing wrong with using the original premise in which the ENTIRE toy line has been based off of from its inception. Its patriotic, its Americans as heroes, its just plain praising what our soldiers do to fight the evil of the world. Why does it need to be changed? Why does it need to be dumbed down for people like you Thrillho?

I tend to care that is being dumbed down even if its a glorified kiddie movie...which apparently got you all worked up (just look at your stupid rant), not me.


P.S. Snake Eyes still looks cool as shit.....if you want to agree with that Thrillho go ahead. But i am done arguing how little of G.I. Joe they are getting correct.

[RV]

I'm glad Ratto decided to regurgitate this thread. It needs to be preserved in a time capsule or something.

[PTanner]

Nothing wrong with a Brussels-based organization devoted to protecting freedom. NATO is based in Brussels.

[Mike Douche]

Intrepid Reader:  Teh Hobart Cocksmith

Did someone say "Variety"?

[*In a Nutsack]

Changing GI Joe is ghey.

[butthead]

Do you think people in Germany freaked out when Bumblebee was changed from a VW to a Chevy in the Transformers movie?

And why is the idea of Americans working together with other countries to fight evil so crazy? It worked OK before.

[Thrillho]

If you want to rip apart my quote you might want to get the down low info...

From Variety...(which you even quote 2 paragraphs later)

G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer.

Uhh yeah no where does it say Destro is in league with Cobra, it says he leads them. Cobra is founded and lead by Cobra Commander, Destro is a mercenary or a high ranking general within Cobra who is in love with Cobra's second in command the Baroness. (I can't believe i still remember this crap from the 80's cartoon)

Yeah... One-sentence plot summaries in Variety are totally gospel, especially when they're published nearly two years before a film's slated release date. (Fuck, why even go to movies when I can just find out what happens by reading Variety?)

Do tell me, though: is this "Cobra Commander" character who's billed third on the movie's IMDB page just Destro's cabana boy or something?

If so, that's a hell of a missed opportunity. They could have totally made him a terrorist commander or something. Oh, well... I guess there's always the sequel!

The 80's version is the version of G.I. Joe everyone wants, everyone expects, and everyone remembers. If it doesnt resemble that then it going to bomb big time.

There was nothing wrong with using the original premise in which the ENTIRE toy line has been based off of from its inception. Its patriotic, its Americans as heroes, its just plain praising what our soldiers do to fight the evil of the world. Why does it need to be changed? Why does it need to be dumbed down for people like you Thrillho?

It doesn't need to be "dumbed down" for me at all, Mike. In fact, judging by the credits of the producers, director and screenwriters alone, there's a damn good chance I'll never see this movie. (Which is not to mention that I hate America and her fightin' troops, and thus deplore anything that could even just potentially "praise" them and their advanced laser weaponry. But that just goes without saying... I vote Democrat.)

I tend to care that is being dumbed down even if its a glorified kiddie movie...which apparently got you all worked up (just look at your stupid rant), not me.

Which stupid rant, Mike? The one where I called you out on plagiarizing your arch-conservative outrage from some clownish blogger, who was totally wrong on the facts to boot?

Because I'd bet dollars to donuts that that's something we could do all day long with your screeds. (First, I'll need a team of research monkeys and a dedicated T1 line...)

[Simmer]

I'm scared that they will ruin this movie.  To put this whole "skewing the original material" into perspective, look at The Transformers movie.  To me, it completely bastardized the story/plot/mythos, yet people still went to see it in droves, and most of the folks liked it.  I thought it was a piece of shit, but I was glad to see a new generation be exposed to a great continuity. 

If they disgruntle lil' ol' me over a remake of a cartoon for the sake of hooking a new generation of the young kiddies, I can live with that.  If they fuck up GI Joe, I'll be mighty pissed, but what is one to do? 

Just put Firefly and/or Beachhead in the fuckin' movie and BE DONE WITH IT!

[Slaky+]

I hope the reggae guy is in it.