Kerry Wood Sploogefest Thread

[butthead]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

[Gil Gunderson]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

[smg]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

[5laky]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

[butthead]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

[5laky]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

[butthead]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

[CT II]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

[butthead]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'm broke, but I hear there's a guy in Dallas that's interested.

[Quality Start Machine]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'm broke, but I hear there's a guy in Dallas that's interested.

Sorry, Yellon shot that one down.

[Thrillho]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'll start buying up Replay For Riches scratch-and-wins, you tackle Little Lotto. RV will pwn the Dow.

I'm sure we can scrape together what we need in no time.

[Simmer]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

Best Post Of Thread Award goes to Slaky, come on down and take your award, y'little rascal you!

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'll start buying up Replay For Riches scratch-and-wins, you tackle Little Lotto. RV will pwn the Dow.

I'm sure we can scrape together what we need in no time.

I've always said that one day we could have actual real life legitimate say-so within the Cubs organization.  For serious.  It has already begun.

[LoneStarCubFan]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'm broke, but I hear there's a guy in Dallas that's interested.

I am. But I don't think I can scare up the cash on such short notice. I can see if Mark Cuban would like to buy in though.

[Mike Douche]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'm broke, but I hear there's a guy in Dallas that's interested.

I am. But I don't think I can scare up the cash on such short notice. I can see if Mark Cuban would like to buy in though.

LoneStar would make George Steinbrenner seem like PK Wrigley.

[Quality Start Machine]

After that article comes out, how does Hendry not call Wood or his agent (or both on some new-fangled conference call function that I don't think has been invented yet) and say, "Hey, Kerry. I fucked this one up. I thought we were doing what's best for you, but you want a one year deal to stay here? You got it bud. How much do you want? It's on."

That's what I'd do.

If Hendry does not offer him a one year deal now, then somebody is lying. Either.....

1. Hendry really doesn't want him back.
or
2. Piniella doesn't want him back.
or
3. Marmol is whining about not being the closer and they are trying to make him happy for some reason.
or
4. Kerry really wouldn't accept a one year deal but is trying to come off as the good guy to the media and fans.

Even though I like Kerry Wood as much as the next Cubs fan, this does seem pretty likely.  Isn't this what most professional athletes say when they leave a city they've been a part of for a while?

He said yesterday that they live here year-round and they're putting their kids in school here.  His wife is from Chicago.  I think he meant it.

I do too. My thinking is that Hendry and the rest of the staff decided it's time to move on.

Well if they can get him for one year, it's stupid to move on. There were two relievers on the team worth a damn last year, and now there is one. It's not like it's a rebuilding year.

Yeah, that's how most of us feel. Unfortunately, we aren't the staff.

We should be the staff. That would be cool.

Sam Zell needs buyers...who's with me?

I'm broke, but I hear there's a guy in Dallas that's interested.

I am. But I don't think I can scare up the cash on such short notice. I can see if Mark Cuban would like to buy in though.

LoneStar would make George Steinbrenner seem like PK Wrigley.

Owner ANGRYHuey would yell at the outfielders to get off his lawn.