Kerry Wood Sploogefest Thread

[Mike Douche]

Meh.

I'm not nearly as upset about this as I thought I would be.

Some of y'all are little bitches.

[JD]

FUCK BALLS COCK DICK MEAT CURTAIN DONUT FUCK COCK I HATE THIS SHIT BALLS DICK COCK FUCK SHIT BITCH DOUCHE.

Fuck.  This sucks.  On a sentimental level, this is a kick in the fuckin' sperm flagella.

I haven't been this upset about a Cub leaving. Ever. Shit!

Kerry's taken one-year deals for about three straight years now (I'm sure I'll be corrected on that).  For Jeebus' sake, he finally showed he can stay healthy and excel in a role and you let him walk?  Because he wants a second or third year?  Maybe I'm being obtuse, but this is really disheartening.

Didn't he miss some time this year, too?  This is a business.  Like Jay Mohr said, "It's not show friends, it's SHOW ME THE MONEY!"  Or something.  I can't remember.  But he was a real jerk in that movie.  Jerry Maguire was trying to change the world, yo.  And Jay Mohr was a saboteur.  SABOTEUR!

What were we talking about?

[Philberto]

FUCK BALLS COCK DICK MEAT CURTAIN DONUT FUCK COCK I HATE THIS SHIT BALLS DICK COCK FUCK SHIT BITCH DOUCHE.

Fuck.  This sucks.  On a sentimental level, this is a kick in the fuckin' sperm flagella.

I haven't been this upset about a Cub leaving. Ever. Shit!

Kerry's taken one-year deals for about three straight years now (I'm sure I'll be corrected on that).  For Jeebus' sake, he finally showed he can stay healthy and excel in a role and you let him walk?  Because he wants a second or third year?  Maybe I'm being obtuse, but this is really disheartening.

Don't worry it'll be even more disheartening when Peavy winds up in Atlanta and Dempster is pitching for somebody else next year.

I can see the first happening, but if the first happens I don't think the Cubs will let Dempster leave. Either way, I just can't really comprehend this. Dammit.

Meh.

I'm not nearly as upset about this as I thought I would be.

Some of y'all are little bitches.

Yes, I am.

[Mike Douche]

What were we talking about?

Hard to tell.  I always fall under the spell of you avatar, JD.

[TJ]

He was fragile. But there were few players that I rooted for more than him.



Godspeed, Kerry Wood.

This kind of sucks. Maybe it's the smart thing to do, maybe it's not, but that's not the issue. When you're a kid you get attached to the players on your favorite team, but as an adult you're supposed to be smarter than that. We are just rooting for laundry after all. But it is sad to see him go.

We are rooting for laundry, but let's be honest: who among us continued rooting for the Blitz after they traded the entire team (coaches and all) to the Wranglers in 1984?

Seriously, I'd love to see that experiment conducted on a grand scale. Swap the Dodgers and Angels (players, coaches, etc) and see what happens to the fans.  They nearly did a similar swap when Jeffrey Loria, John Henry and MLB executed a three-way deal that gave Henry the Red Sox, MLB the Expos and Loria the Marlins.  Torborg and staff and Cliff Floyd became Marlins.  

The only reason we root for a team is because we identify with the team in some way.  When a guy who has been with the team for 11 years leaves after having a strong season (and only being 31), it's disappointing.

[*In a Nutsack]

Do the Cubs get two first-round draft picks because of this?

It's probably the right thing to do, but I got that kick in the balls feeling in my stomach right now.

And yes, Mike D, I am a little bitch.

[TJ]

Do the Cubs get two first-round draft picks because of this?

It's probably the right thing to do, but I got that kick in the balls feeling in my stomach right now.

I believe he's a "Type A" free agent.

In other news, the Sox dumped Steve Swisher's son.

[JD]

What were we talking about?

Hard to tell.  I always fall under the spell of you avatar, JD.

If you ain't too busy, then maybe you can take a ride into the danger zone with me so we can be playin' with the boys.

[Chuck to Chuck]

For Jeebus' sake, he finally showed he can stay healthy and excel in a role and you let him walk?  Because he wants a second or third year?  Maybe I'm being obtuse, but this is really disheartening.

He missed a month with a blister and he wants 4 years.

'Tanks, but no 'tanks to the reliever to nowhere.

[Andre Dawson's Creek]

This sucks.  A lot.  But I'll get over it.  It's not like the time they let Paul Noce go.

[Mike Douche]

What were we talking about?

Hard to tell.  I always fall under the spell of you avatar, JD.

If you ain't too busy, then maybe you can take a ride into the danger zone with me so we can be playin' with the boys.

JD, you take my breath away.

[Brant Brown]

So I'm not the only one who feels like they just took a swift kick to the balls?

[Shooter]

Do the Cubs get two first-round draft picks because of this?

It's probably the right thing to do, but I got that kick in the balls feeling in my stomach right now.

And yes, Mike D, I am a little bitch.

Those always go well.

[PenFoe]

Meh.

I'm not nearly as upset about this as I thought I would be.

Some of y'all are little bitches.

[thehawk]

FUCK BALLS COCK DICK MEAT CURTAIN DONUT FUCK COCK I HATE THIS SHIT BALLS DICK COCK FUCK SHIT BITCH DOUCHE.

Fuck.  This sucks.  On a sentimental level, this is a kick in the fuckin' sperm flagella.

I haven't been this upset about a Cub leaving. Ever. Shit!

I can think of one.  Also a pitcher, wore glasses.  Didn't bring the heat like Woody, but was pretty good also.

Wondering who is going to give Wood a 3 or 4 year deal, but sure there is someone out there who will.  Thanks for the memories Kerry.