Pollyellon banned me

[InternetApex]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

[Slaky]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

This is how I feel. Fuck history.

[Quality Start Machine]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

This is how I feel. Fuck history.

One of my favorite moments in Wrigley Field was Tarzan Wallis breaking up a Tom Seaver no-hitter in the 9th with a triple, then the Cubs winning it in the 11th. Alvin can eat shit.

[Saul Goodman]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

This is how I feel. Fuck history.

One of my favorite moments in Wrigley Field was Tarzan Wallis breaking up a Tom Seaver no-hitter in the 9th with a triple, then the Cubs winning it in the 11th. Alvin can eat shit.

We have to include Brett in this too, because he said the same thing.

[Quality Start Machine]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

This is how I feel. Fuck history.

One of my favorite moments in Wrigley Field was Tarzan Wallis breaking up a Tom Seaver no-hitter in the 9th with a triple, then the Cubs winning it in the 11th. Alvin can eat shit.

We have to include Brett in this too, because he said the same thing.

Two shitburgers, coming up.

[SKO]

I witnessed one of the best pitching performances in recent history. And it really pissed me off. I wish Bryant would have poked that ball in the seats so Hamels had to stay out there and throw another 10-20 pitches. There was nary a Phillie even stretching in the pen. I wish he would have thrown 160 pitches and then gone to the emergency room for an IV and then visited Dr. Andrews next week.

Fuck him.

This is how I feel. Fuck history.

One of my favorite moments in Wrigley Field was Tarzan Wallis breaking up a Tom Seaver no-hitter in the 9th with a triple, then the Cubs winning it in the 11th. Alvin can eat shit.

We have to include Brett in this too, because he said the same thing.

Two shitburgers, coming up.

Can we also include people who say "all you can do is tip your cap!" when opposing pitchers do well? I refuse. i will tip no caps, sir.

[SKO]

Just thinking of this one today:

Some of you are excited about Kris Bryant and penciling him into the lineup in 2015 or 2016 ... the man isn't even signed yet and hasn't played a single professional game. Sure, he looks like a great talent and will likely succeed at the big-league level, but there are no guarantees.

I repeat, just so there is no misunderstanding: there are no guarantees with prospects. Sure, they look great now, and it appears that Theo & Co. have made good selections in their two years at this game. But if you think all of these players are going to be leading the Cubs to the postseason and the World Series in 2015, or 2016, or beyond, you have a better crystal ball than I do.

[Saul Goodman]

Just thinking of this one today:

Some of you are excited about Kris Bryant and penciling him into the lineup in 2015 or 2016 ... the man isn't even signed yet and hasn't played a single professional game. Sure, he looks like a great talent and will likely succeed at the big-league level, but there are no guarantees.

I repeat, just so there is no misunderstanding: there are no guarantees with prospects. Sure, they look great now, and it appears that Theo & Co. have made good selections in their two years at this game. But if you think all of these players are going to be leading the Cubs to the postseason and the World Series in 2015, or 2016, or beyond, you have a better crystal ball than I do.

After all his crimes Al is absolutely not allowed to enjoy this run.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Just thinking of this one today:

Some of you are excited about Kris Bryant and penciling him into the lineup in 2015 or 2016 ... the man isn't even signed yet and hasn't played a single professional game. Sure, he looks like a great talent and will likely succeed at the big-league level, but there are no guarantees.

I repeat, just so there is no misunderstanding: there are no guarantees with prospects. Sure, they look great now, and it appears that Theo & Co. have made good selections in their two years at this game. But if you think all of these players are going to be leading the Cubs to the postseason and the World Series in 2015, or 2016, or beyond, you have a better crystal ball than I do.

After all his crimes Al is absolutely not allowed to enjoy this run.

How many more tears, Theo? should be on this unironic asshat's fucking tombstone.

[SKO]

Nice to see that Al apparently said Heyward wasn't worth the money until the Cubs signed him and then he was.

[Quality Start Machine]

http://wgntv.com/2015/12/15/cubs-fan-serenades-jason-heyward-with-awesome-beatles-parody/

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

http://wgntv.com/2015/12/15/cubs-fan-serenades-jason-heyward-with-awesome-beatles-parody/

That sound you hear is WGN racing to irrelevance at warp speed. 

[D. Doluntap]

http://wgntv.com/2015/12/15/cubs-fan-serenades-jason-heyward-with-awesome-beatles-parody/

It would have been better/even worse if he'd covered the cool version:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0y8Q2PATVyI

[Saul Goodman]

We all know Al's game recaps are completely pointless: He goes on and on for thousands of words regurgitating game logs and ruminating on hot topics such as the weather, who was sitting in his vicinity out in the bleachers, and what he was wearing.

But here's something even more pointless: Reposting these recaps with a couple grandiose paragraphs about how important is was to win some random game in June.  Just when we think Al has reached a new level of contempt for his readership, he goes out and does this.  Bravo.

Yes, there's a new post in this thread that isn't announcing Al's death.  I'm not sorry.

[Saul Goodman]

Al realizes he was wrong to doubt Theo and take sides, and he's sorry for banning anyone who disagreed with his wrong and bad opinions. You're welcome to come back, but first you have to apologize to Al for being banned. What's that? Al's the one who was wrong so why should you apologize? That's a personal attack. Al's sorry, but you're still banned. Now go away.