Crazy Uncle Milton's Shot Blasting Sploogefest Emporium

[MAD]

.184

Intrepid Reader:  The Genius

Is that a significant number?

[MikeC]

Hey masturbate some more to the guy hittting .182 almost two months into the season.

It's almost like after he signed his 30 million dollar deal he just doesn't give fuck any more.

Maybe by the all-star break he can lift it above .200.

[MAD]

Hey masturbate some more to the guy hittting .182 almost two months into the season.

It's almost like after he signed his 30 million dollar deal he just doesn't give fuck any more.

Maybe by the all-star break he can lift it above .200.

The season started April 6th and Milt has missed a few weeks.  It seems his numbers are based on a sample size that reflects one month, not two.

[air2300]

Hey masturbate some more to the guy hittting .182 almost two months into the season.

It's almost like after he signed his 30 million dollar deal he just doesn't give fuck any more.

Maybe by the all-star break he can lift it above .200.

Really?  I know he has struggled so far, but I just don't see the whole "he doesn't give a fuck".    

[Slaky]

Hey masturbate some more to the guy hittting .182 almost two months into the season.

It's almost like after he signed his 30 million dollar deal he just doesn't give fuck any more.

Maybe by the all-star break he can lift it above .200.

Now I know I'm right.

[Tank]

Hey masturbate some more to the guy hittting .182 almost two months into the season.

It's almost like after he signed his 30 million dollar deal he just doesn't give fuck any more.

Maybe by the all-star break he can lift it above .200.

It's oddly heartening to know that I still hate the piss out of you even when you actually talk about baseball.

[LoneStarCubFan]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

[Philberto]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

Ibanez has 17 HRs? Jeebus.

Pen, you might.... just might be getting another hater on board.

[LoneStarCubFan]

Hey, but Milt is up to .188 and he hasn't been ejected or hurt in a couple of weeks...

I'm sure he can get over the Mendoza Line before the All-Star Break.

Nice fucking work Jim. Maybe Creighton will take you back.

[TDubbs]

What a fucking morgan.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4204044

[Philberto]

What a fucking morgan.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4204044

HOLD THE BLACK MAN DOWN!

[Eli]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

What's your point?  I know, I know.  Your point is that Ibanez is having a much better year than Milton Bradley.  And that Hendry, using his magical Hindsight Algorithm, should have signed Ibanez because it was so obvious to everyone Raul Ibanez would hit 17 home runs by the third week of May.

But what in Ibanez's history suggested it was a good idea to sign him?  He's going to be 37 this year, he makes Adam Dunn look good on defense and he's been stuck as a 820-ish OPS player for years.  All reasonable thought would have indicated that's a bad signing.  And sometimes, weird things happen like mediocre 37-year-old corner outfielders get really hot for two months and crush the ball.  You're crazy if you think he'll keep up his 1.151 OPS pace.

Actually, it's pretty clear that you're crazy, regardless of your belief in the preceding statement.

[Internet Apex]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

What's your point?  I know, I know.  Your point is that Ibanez is having a much better year than Milton Bradley.  And that Hendry, using his magical Hindsight Algorithm, should have signed Ibanez because it was so obvious to everyone Raul Ibanez would hit 17 home runs by the third week of May.

But what in Ibanez's history suggested it was a good idea to sign him?  He's going to be 37 this year, he makes Adam Dunn look good on defense and he's been stuck as a 820-ish OPS player for years.  All reasonable thought would have indicated that's a bad signing.  And sometimes, weird things happen like mediocre 37-year-old corner outfielders get really hot for two months and crush the ball.  You're crazy if you think he'll keep up his 1.151 OPS pace.

Actually, it's pretty clear that you're crazy, regardless of your belief in the preceding statement.

Playing in a bandbox like Philly doesn't hurt either. Fuck Hendry for not signing Bradley and having him hit there instead of Wrigley in April and May where the wind blows in most of the time. But then again, I'm sure Ibanez could cut through that shit storm and rain splooge onto the the bleacher denizens for two months straight.

[LoneStarCubFan]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

What's your point?  I know, I know.  Your point is that Ibanez is having a much better year than Milton Bradley.  And that Hendry, using his magical Hindsight Algorithm, should have signed Ibanez because it was so obvious to everyone Raul Ibanez would hit 17 home runs by the third week of May.

But what in Ibanez's history suggested it was a good idea to sign him?  He's going to be 37 this year, he makes Adam Dunn look good on defense and he's been stuck as a 820-ish OPS player for years.  All reasonable thought would have indicated that's a bad signing.  And sometimes, weird things happen like mediocre 37-year-old corner outfielders get really hot for two months and crush the ball.  You're crazy if you think he'll keep up his 1.151 OPS pace.

Actually, it's pretty clear that you're crazy, regardless of your belief in the preceding statement.

What in Bradley's history indicates he's worth a shit for a full season unless he spends most of it as a DH?

[Internet Apex]

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=4245

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/players/profile?playerId=3504

What's your point?  I know, I know.  Your point is that Ibanez is having a much better year than Milton Bradley.  And that Hendry, using his magical Hindsight Algorithm, should have signed Ibanez because it was so obvious to everyone Raul Ibanez would hit 17 home runs by the third week of May.

But what in Ibanez's history suggested it was a good idea to sign him?  He's going to be 37 this year, he makes Adam Dunn look good on defense and he's been stuck as a 820-ish OPS player for years.  All reasonable thought would have indicated that's a bad signing.  And sometimes, weird things happen like mediocre 37-year-old corner outfielders get really hot for two months and crush the ball.  You're crazy if you think he'll keep up his 1.151 OPS pace.

Actually, it's pretty clear that you're crazy, regardless of your belief in the preceding statement.

What in Bradley's history indicates he's worth a shit for a full season unless he spends most of it as a DH?

What in your recent history indicates that anybody gives a shit what you think about shit?