Parks and Recreation

[J. Walter Weatherman]

"Let's begin this show by starting it."

More Perd Hapley, please.

"Now it's time for our next segment, which is a commercial."

"Issue number one is the first issue that we are going to talk about."

[Saul Goodman]

Welcome back, Ron Swanson.

[R-V]

If you didn't laugh your tiny nuts off during Andy's Road House re-enactment, you should have your esophagus ripped out until you starve to death.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

If you didn't laugh your tiny nuts off during Andy's Road House re-enactment, you should have your esophagus ripped out until you starve to death.

Or his impression of John Rambo in Rambo (2008).

"Do you have guns?"

[Powdered Toast Man]

Andy Dwyer, Pawnee P.D.

[Saul Goodman]

AV Club has a five-part season walkthrough with Michael Schur that is very much worth your time.

I'd post links but I'm on mobile.

[thehawk]

AV Club has a five-part season walkthrough with Michael Schur that is very much worth your time.

I'd post links but I'm on mobile.

http://www.avclub.com/articles/showrunner-michael-schur-on-building-parks-and-rec,81404/

[Saul Goodman]

AV Club has a five-part season walkthrough with Michael Schur that is very much worth your time.

I'd post links but I'm on mobile.

http://www.avclub.com/articles/showrunner-michael-schur-on-building-parks-and-rec,81404/

Another outfield assist for the Hawk.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/z5asn/im_nick_offerman_i_play_ron_swanson_on_parks_and/

"I know you and your character have a lot things in common, in what ways are you drastically different from Ron? (if any)"

I wouldn't call it drastic, but my penis is 5/8" larger than Ron's, in both length AND breadth, but it is held that he wields his with greater aplomb.

"When did you first meet Amy Poehler, and how awesome is she in real life?"

I met Amy in the early 90's and she is like a superhero mixed with both Coach and Tammie Taylor from FNL, as well as Tim Riggins and a little Landry.

"What about woodworking appeals most to you? Do you woodwork with friends?"

The moments of truth in woodworking:

1) When you flood your finished wood with oil, and the grain, color and figure jump out like a visual lung-full of opium smoke (so I've read).

2) When the piece you have wrought comes into use. The canoe, the table, the canoe paddle, the pipe, the cribbage board.... when you rest your steak and your whiskey upon the table you have made, you feel pretty goddamn tall for keeping those treats off the ground..

"Nick, I watched in awe your web video in which you built a canoe and must say that it's quite impressive. My question is simple, whats your favorite type of wood to work with, and why?"

It's difficult to name a favorite wood. They are all so noble, each with its own special characteristics.

Oak is mighty and dense, for the hull of your square-rigged sailing ship, but also, when quarter-sawn, its medullary rays can make your library table sing with erudition. Maple and Birch are creamy and many colored, like a delicious bowl of only Lucky Charms marshmallows. Cedar and Redwood are lightweight but extremely high in tensile strength, rendering them perfect for boatbuilding in the smaller classes of watercraft. Bamboo (a grass) makes nature's bong. Walnut (esp. California Claro) is my gold standard for depth of figure, strength, beauty, and workability. Ash and Hickory, straight-grained and true, make excellent bludgeons, dandy for the cudgeling of vegetarians.

"What's your favorite thing about each of the cast members of Parks and Rec? Do you worry that you're going to be defined by this role for some time?"

Amy - Her ability to combine mischief with leadership and generosity of spirit.

Adam - His sweet, gumdrop caboose.

Pratt - Best personality ever, like a golden lab meets Don Knotts. Also a fine backside.

Rashida - Incredibly well-adjusted and lovely for having been bitten by Michael Jackson's monkey as a child. Not a euphemism.

Aziz - He can say anything in the most hilarious way - also keepin' them buns tight.

Aubrey - She is beautiful and wonderful - not evil, don't be ridiculous.

Rob - A champion in every way, super funny - wouldn't mind a tad more junk in his trunk.

Retta - Could rule the world if she so chose. DISCERNING. Beautiful.

As far as typecasting, I honestly don't really give a shit. I feel pretty damn lucky to have landed in the role of Ron, and if I am defined that way, well, I can think of worse problems. If no one will hire me after Ron then I'll have to suffer through making things in my shop, performing live theater, and paddling my canoe with my wife. Yes, that was a euphemism.

"what is the hardest part of acting as Ron Swanson"

Keeping a straight face in the onslaught of hilarity from all of our cast, except Jerry.

"How much can your mustache bench press?"

114 lbs. of wife.

[R-V]

except Jerry.

So goddamn awesome.

[thehawk]

CalamityJane1852 515 points 1 day ago

What's a typical evening at home like with Megan?


[–]NickOfferman 1720 points 1 day ago

Oh, gosh. Well, we get dressed up as Marx Brothers (she's always Groucho or Harpo, and I'm Chico...whatever, she made the outfits.) and we get sauced on Gin and goofballs and run around the yard, sometimes with a lot of horn-honking, and then I set up the target rings at which Megan fires ping-pong balls and sometimes racquet balls from her vagina, often racking up an impressive tally of points (she got a 420 last night!), while I assemble my black powder muzzle-loader collection and fire lead balls at our neighbor, Charlie Sheen's secret wife's mom's jungle cats (I miss on purpose, I'm not a dick.) Normal Hollywood shit.

Just go over there and read the whole thing

[Richard Chuggar]

http://www.uproxx.com/tv/2012/09/parks-and-recreation-gag-reel/

[Brownie]

From the current Indiana University Alumni Magazine. I like to skim through the class notes for people in and around my graduating class.

[Eli]

From the current Indiana University Alumni Magazine. I like to skim through the class notes for people in and around my graduating class.

That's outstanding.

[Quality Start Machine]

I say we raffle off the opportunity to write a bio for TJ.