The Chicago Shite Sox

[Internet Apex]

White Sex?

That's some fancy letterin'.  I think it says "Mb1TF Gex".

Translated it means: "Me? Boy, I'd like to fuck Chris Getz." Socks fans are an odd sort. I no like.

[BH]

Kenny doesn't like it that Ozzie has a Twitter account.

"Listen, I'm a grown man," Guillen said. "A lot of people think I do stuff without thinking or talking to people. Any information out there, I'm not stupid enough where I will say, 'We're going to make a move today.' ... That's not the idea. I'm not going to give fans the message before I give it to the media, it's never going to happen. The Twitter is like what I am doing today, have fun with it. It's all personal."

"First of all, I don't know how to Twitter. Second of all, I'm not going to learn how to Twitter. Look, I've heard of Facebook. Actually, it's on my phone; I see it once in a while," Piniella said.

"But I'm really not a Facebook or Twitter guy, you know? I'm a prime rib and baked potato guy," he said.

[BH]

This is gonna be great to follow all year long.

""We tried to make a leadoff hitter out of that guy for the last three years, [former prospect] Jerry Owens, and look at what happened. What we have here is legit. He's got experience. One thing about Juan, he brings a lot of stuff off the field. He's a leader, he's a hard worker, I think he's a guy who brings enthusiasm to the game.""

[Saul Goodman]

From the minor league organizational rankings by Kevin Goldstein at BP:

27. Chicago White Sox
Last Year's Ranking: 24
Why They Are Here: In some ways it's for good reasons, as Gordon Beckham developed so fast that he's not eligible any more. Still, after that, things fall off quite quickly, as we can dream on Jared Mitchell all day long, but he and outfielder Jordan Danks are the only position prospects who would also rank on other teams' lists.
Where They Will Be Next Year: Could go either way. Mitchell is a boom or bust type, as is outfielder Trayce Thompson, while third baseman Dayan Viciedo is looking like he might fall into the same category. They'll likely lose top prospect Daniel Hudson, and possibly their third-best player, Tyler Flowers, tio major-league promotions, so somebody has to step up.

Cubs will be in the top half tomorrow.

[powen01]

"TAINT!"

[Shooter]

"TAINT!"

John Kass is indignant!!!!!!!

[Chuck to Chuck]

Was I the only one shocked to find out it wasn't two men in the stall?

[Internet Apex]

Was I the only one shocked to find out it wasn't two men in the stall?

It wasn't on the Northside.

[Slaky]

Was I the only one shocked to find out it wasn't two men in the stall?

It wasn't on the Northside.

Yeah, that's definitely what Sox fans were thinking reading that article.

"If dat was at Wriggly dere would be two pee pee smoochers in dere!"

[MAD]

Seriously, what is wrong with people?

[Quality Start Machine]

Was I the only one shocked to find out it wasn't two men in the stall?

It wasn't on the Northside.

Yeah, that's definitely what Sox fans were thinking reading that article.

"If dat was at Wriggly dere would be two pee pee smoochers in dere!"

Those weren't real Sox fans, as we all know they only pay attention to what happens on the field, whereas Cub fans only want the ballpark experience.

[R-V]

"TAINT!"

John Kass is indignant!!!!!!!

Christ almighty, this Kasshurtedness is almost as laughable as Billy Payne's sermon on morality at Augusta.

But they'll have security — off-duty cops — watching every restroom. Bet on it.

That's because two big-time Sox fans, guys who can actually name great players of the past, read the Tribune and won't let it happen again. Their names are Mayor Richard Daley and Sox Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf.

They're parents. And so are many Sox players.

You can BET ON no more blumpkins at the Cell, pal. Because I am John Kass and I'm still important!

[MAD]

Was I the only one shocked to find out it wasn't two men in the stall?

It wasn't on the Northside.

Yeah, that's definitely what Sox fans were thinking reading that article.

"If dat was at Wriggly dere would be two pee pee smoochers in dere!"

Those weren't real Sox fans, as we all know they only pay attention to what happens on the at Wrigley fField, whereas Cub fans only want the ballpark experience.

Unhealthy obsession'd.

[BH]

I've heard this same thing happens at PF Chang's.

[powen01]

"TAINT!"

John Kass is indignant!!!!!!!

Christ almighty, this Kasshurtedness is almost as laughable as Billy Payne's sermon on morality at Augusta.

But they'll have security — off-duty cops — watching every restroom. Bet on it.

That's because two big-time Sox fans, guys who can actually name great players of the past, read the Tribune and won't let it happen again. Their names are Mayor Richard Daley and Sox Chairman Jerry Reinsdorf.

They're parents. And so are many Sox players.

You can BET ON no more blumpkins at the Cell, pal. Because I am John Kass and I'm still important!

I have started to take my shits with the door open... everywhere...  lest John Kass kick in the door on his sexual witch hunt.  I never told you guys how I wipe, but Jonn "Da Public Sex Police" Kass will know soon enough.  Watch out for that column.  He is going to be very indignant, slightly horrified and covered in poo.