Score some fucking runs thread

[CT III]

At some point, when a team is struggling, the "stars" have got to be the ones to put the team on their back.
With Aramis out and Milton apparently not very good at baseball, that leaves Soriano.

He's not very good at baseball, either.  He does get 3 or 4 hitting spurts a year that last a week or so that fake everyone out, but he remains an awful, awful baseball player. I'm a parody of myself!  Yay!

FYC'd.

Internet Chuck is my favorite fictional character.

He fucked a barrel full of rice and got it pregnant. A big pile of rice popped out.

Pex, I appreciate you trying to keep it fresh, but you've gotta dump this bit. 

It's bombing.

[BH]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

Question about your avatar, did the cubs install an actual vending machine in their dugout?

[morpheus]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too. 

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method. 

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

[ChuckD]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too.  

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method.  

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

Rebuttal: Dave Kingman

[BH]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too. 

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method. 

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

Baseball Reference does not track one's TORP rating.

[Apexx]

At some point, when a team is struggling, the "stars" have got to be the ones to put the team on their back.
With Aramis out and Milton apparently not very good at baseball, that leaves Soriano.

He's not very good at baseball, either.  He does get 3 or 4 hitting spurts a year that last a week or so that fake everyone out, but he remains an awful, awful baseball player. I'm a parody of myself!  Yay!

FYC'd.

Internet Chuck is my favorite fictional character.

He fucked a barrel full of rice and got it pregnant. A big pile of rice popped out.

Pex, I appreciate you trying to keep it fresh, but you've gotta dump this bit. 

It's bombing.

:(

[Kermit, B.]

At some point, when a team is struggling, the "stars" have got to be the ones to put the team on their back.
With Aramis out and Milton apparently not very good at baseball, that leaves Soriano.

He's not very good at baseball, either.  He does get 3 or 4 hitting spurts a year that last a week or so that fake everyone out, but he remains an awful, awful baseball player.

God damn, you're dumb about baseball.  No wonder you and Kaplan only have each other as "sources."

[CBStew]

How can we fail to get a bunch of runs with today's lineup?  Scales at third.  Fontenot at second.  Blanco at short.  Hill catching.  Oh yeah.  Lee at first and Soriano in left.

[RV]

According to my baseball mainframe, over the last 67 non-Pirate innings this offense has scored 6 stinking runs. Woof.

[Chuck to Chuck]

How can we fail to get a bunch of runs with today's lineup?  Scales at third.  Fontenot at second.  Blanco at short.  Hill catching.  Oh yeah.  Lee at first and Soriano in left.

I got excited for a second.  I thought you said Soriano left.

[*In a Nutsack]

How can we fail to get a bunch of runs with today's lineup?  Scales at third.  Fontenot at second.  Blanco at short.  Hill catching.  Oh yeah.  Lee at first and Soriano in left.

HOFFPOWAKER IN RF DUMMIEESZZZZ

PS:  I didn't quite know where to put this, but being a regular skimmer of Rotoworld I sometimes notice that they can bring the chuckle from time to time.  They had to say this about Andres Blanco's hitting:

"Ryan Theriot was held out of Friday's lineup with flu-like symptoms.

Andres Blanco will start in his place at shortstop. Keep in mind, however, that Blanco suffers at the plate from Rey Ordonez-like symptoms."

ZING!

[CBStew]

Nevertheless.  We gave them a sound thrashing!

[Bonk]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too. 

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method. 

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

You mean he created runs for opponents, right?

Seriously, how can someone with a below average fielding percentage be considered above average?

[morpheus]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too. 

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method. 

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

You mean he created runs for opponents, right?

Seriously, how can someone with a below average fielding percentage be considered above average?

No, he created runs for the Cubs above an average left fielder.  Fielding percentage is a deeply flawed statistic, as any statfaggot will tell you.  Even if you do think it works to differentiate good fielders from bad, .975 is not statistically significantly different from .985 anyway... so call him average in the field if you like.  Chuck's contention is that he's so awful in the field that his above average offense is overcome.  I have proven here that Chuck is wrong.  Rule 10.17(c) applies.

[RV]

Al Yellon: "Hoffpauir sucked during his September callup if you exclude the games where he got hits."

Chuck: "Soriano was is terrible unless you include the once-a every-other-month week-and-a-half spurts where he's the best hitter you'd see anywhere which makes him tolerable so long as you ignore his defense."

You really think that his defensive shortcomings overcome his offensive skills?  Luckily, they make statistics on fielding too. 

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/s/soriaal01-field.shtml

Let's take 2008 as an example. If you want to use fielding percentage, his was .975 versus league average .985 in LF.  A little below average.  The Rtot, which is a comprehensive runs above average statistic, was 1.7.  i.e, he CREATED 1.7 runs above average during the year with his defense.  At least, you'd have to call him an average fielder, unless you want to ignore all numerical evidence and go with the Gary Hughes method. 

In summary: above average on offense, average to above average on defense.  That does not equal awful, awful.

You mean he created runs for opponents, right?

Seriously, how can someone with a below average fielding percentage be considered above average?

Maybe because he throws out a shitload of runners?