Score some fucking runs thread

[Slaky]

Sounds like Coghlan's wearing the Schierholtz Memorial Shit Hat.

I'd give him some time and platoon him while he's sucking.

It's been kind of interesting to see them struggle lately and also to watch us all flip out about losing 2 of 3 to Milwaukee. They're going to have worse stretches than this and in years where they have higher expectations.

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

[Eli]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

[SKO]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

God I hope. I hope Bryant rains death upon them and Jorge Soler goes off for another multi-homer game and the BFIBB twitter feed blows up with a bunch of bitching about that flashy Cuban and his big fucking chains and I hope I get a chance to puff my chest and repeat Len Kasper's "well, get used to him" line from last year over and over.

But I'm also afraid that red hot Cardinals pitching staff continues this nasty slump the offense is in and they drop 3 of 4 or whatever and the actual "sky is falling" crowd will resurface.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

God I hope. I hope Bryant rains death upon them and Jorge Soler goes off for another multi-homer game and the BFIBB twitter feed blows up with a bunch of bitching about that flashy Cuban and his big fucking chains and I hope I get a chance to puff my chest and repeat Len Kasper's "well, get used to him" line from last year over and over.

But I'm also afraid that red hot Cardinals pitching staff continues this nasty slump the offense is in and they drop 3 of 4 or whatever and the actual "sky is falling" crowd will resurface.

Buck up, lil' camper.  They're gonna punch the fucking Cardinals right in the damn mouf this week. /joyful positive

[Eli]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

God I hope. I hope Bryant rains death upon them and Jorge Soler goes off for another multi-homer game and the BFIBB twitter feed blows up with a bunch of bitching about that flashy Cuban and his big fucking chains and I hope I get a chance to puff my chest and repeat Len Kasper's "well, get used to him" line from last year over and over.

But I'm also afraid that red hot Cardinals pitching staff continues this nasty slump the offense is in and they drop 3 of 4 or whatever and the actual "sky is falling" crowd will resurface.

Forget about the Brewers. We must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.

[Slaky]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

God I hope. I hope Bryant rains death upon them and Jorge Soler goes off for another multi-homer game and the BFIBB twitter feed blows up with a bunch of bitching about that flashy Cuban and his big fucking chains and I hope I get a chance to puff my chest and repeat Len Kasper's "well, get used to him" line from last year over and over.

But I'm also afraid that red hot Cardinals pitching staff continues this nasty slump the offense is in and they drop 3 of 4 or whatever and the actual "sky is falling" crowd will resurface.

Forget about the Brewers. We must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.

Believe in the stars? It's like it doesn't even mean anything anymore.

[SKO]

I'm actually still waiting for my FORK APPROVED list of players to hate on the 2015 Cubs.

So far we've ruled out Coghlan (what did you expect?), Ross (not his fault he's on the roster chap), and Schlitter (looks too much like Slaky or something).

Does that just leave Edwin Jackson or what?

[SKO]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

God I hope. I hope Bryant rains death upon them and Jorge Soler goes off for another multi-homer game and the BFIBB twitter feed blows up with a bunch of bitching about that flashy Cuban and his big fucking chains and I hope I get a chance to puff my chest and repeat Len Kasper's "well, get used to him" line from last year over and over.

But I'm also afraid that red hot Cardinals pitching staff continues this nasty slump the offense is in and they drop 3 of 4 or whatever and the actual "sky is falling" crowd will resurface.

Forget about the Brewers. We must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.

Also I lol'd hard at this.

[Powdered Toast Man]

I'm actually still waiting for my FORK APPROVED list of players to hate on the 2015 Cubs.

So far we've ruled out Coghlan (what did you expect?), Ross (not his fault he's on the roster chap), and Schlitter (looks too much like Slaky or something).

Does that just leave Edwin Jackson or what?

Edwin Jackson has actually been good so far.

I definitely hated Brian Schlitter the most so far this season. But he's in Iowa.

Perhaps the Cubs don't have any hateable players at the moment. That's a possibility you might want to consider.

[SKO]

I'm actually still waiting for my FORK APPROVED list of players to hate on the 2015 Cubs.

So far we've ruled out Coghlan (what did you expect?), Ross (not his fault he's on the roster chap), and Schlitter (looks too much like Slaky or something).

Does that just leave Edwin Jackson or what?

Edwin Jackson has actually been good so far.

I definitely hated Brian Schlitter the most so far this season. But he's in Iowa.

Perhaps the Cubs don't have any hateable players at the moment. That's a possibility you might want to consider.

Unless they were sitting at 23-0, this is never, ever right.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'm actually still waiting for my FORK APPROVED list of players to hate on the 2015 Cubs.

So far we've ruled out Coghlan (what did you expect?), Ross (not his fault he's on the roster chap), and Schlitter (looks too much like Slaky or something).

Does that just leave Edwin Jackson or what?

Outside of the 1 high-leverage situation in which he shit the tub, EJax has been able to eat some mop-up innings, so there's that.

Also Schlitter's not on the big-league club so take him off the list.

Not sure if there's anybody else we can hate besides Coghlan and Ross.  I'm so confused right now.

[SKO]

I'm actually still waiting for my FORK APPROVED list of players to hate on the 2015 Cubs.

So far we've ruled out Coghlan (what did you expect?), Ross (not his fault he's on the roster chap), and Schlitter (looks too much like Slaky or something).

Does that just leave Edwin Jackson or what?

Outside of the 1 high-leverage situation in which he shit the tub, EJax has been able to eat some mop-up innings, so there's that.

Also Schlitter's not on the big-league club so take him off the list.

Not sure if there's anybody else we can hate besides Coghlan and Ross.  I'm so confused right now.

I'm happy there are so few hateworthy candidates, mind you, but this team is nowhere near good enough that we can just sit here, not hating anyone. This ain't Canada. Coghlan and Ross can stick it.

[SKO]

Also one other possible solution to the Coghlan problem if he keeps sucking is to hope that when La Stella comes back he could play a passable 3rd till whenever/if ever Javy is ready and they could stick Bryant in LF. La Stella is guy whose one talent seems to be getting on base at a pretty good clip, so that'd be a nice guy to stick in the 9 hole.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Anyway, this 4 gamer with the birds is gonna be nuts. I hope it's hot as fuck in St. Louis and this ends up being the Cubs' national awakening type thing.

Mid-80s all week. Bryant's definitely going to smack his first dong, provided it doesn't get bogged down in the heavy, shit-saturated air.

At higher humidity, balls travel further as air is less dense. http://theweatherprediction.com/habyhints/260/index.html

[Oleg]

I'm good with a Coghlan firebarn.  I'm on board, SKO.  Let's hate!