Totally Unlistenable

[Brownie]

Fact: Rob Dibble won't be behind a microphone.

[Yeti]

Fact: Rob Dibble won't be behind a microphone.

That's a surprise

[CT III]

Fact: Someone still wants Mike North behind a microphone.

He gets it.  He's a regular guy.

[flannj]

Fuck Tom Dreesen.

[Slaky]

Fuck Tom Dreesen.

1000 x this.

[Andy]

I didn't watch when I saw it was him, I assume he told several timely Frank Sinatra anecdotes?

[flannj]

I didn't watch when I saw it was him, I assume he told several timely Frank Sinatra anecdotes?

I think they just play the same interview over and over.

[Armchair_QB]

I didn't watch when I saw it was him, I assume he told several timely Frank Sinatra anecdotes?

On radio he did mention that his new act is all about Sinatra.

[Saul Goodman]

Look who I'm hanging out with!  You all love him, right?  Never thought for a minute when I was growing up in an all black school I'd see a half-black guy get this much better at me than golf!  Maybe his white half is in charge of the golf course and his black half does the intercourse, amirite?  Ha-ha!

[CT III]

"Corporate America's Favorite Entertainer"


Awesome.

[CBStew]

Tom who?

[flannj]

I suppose this is as good a place as any to tell my Tom Dreesen story.
While not nearly as epic as Slaky's bathroom story I'm going to tell it anyway.

This happened around 1983, which would make flannj 24 years old.
I was working during the day at the Board of Trade and tending bar weekday nights and held another bartending job on weekends.
In addition, I was dealing with the complexities of trying to keep the girl I was living with from finding out about my dalliances with the future Mrs. flannj.
Needless to say I was burning the candle at both ends.
Which meant I was a bit of a zombie. This is important to the story.

One of the bartending jobs I had was at Bones, a Lettuce Entertain You restaurant in Lincolnwood.
I was working on a Sunday morning doing my prep work, the place was empty as it was about a half hour before we opened.
Three people walked in, two guys and a woman, and I recognized one of the men as Tom Dreesen.
The other guy appeared to be a friend and the woman seemed to be his agent.
I recognized Dreesen from TV. Most likely the Tonight Show, and given that at that time my comedic interest ran more to George Carlin, Emo Phillips, and Sam Kinison I knew him to be the unfunny fuck that he remains today.

The three of them walked to the bar and I asked if I could get them anything. Dreesen and the other guy declined but the woman asked for a virgin strawberry daiquiri.
I set about making the drink in the blender directly in front of them.
They were going over some notes comparing different comedy clubs in the Chicago area. At one point Dreesen asked me if I could recommend any clubs other than Zanie's.
Now given my exhausted state Zanie's was all I could think of and like a moron I replied "Uh, well there's always Zanie's".

They stared at me and I returned to making the drink.

Now when making a frozen blended drink the order in which the ingredients go into  the blender is key.
Put the wet ingredients in first followed by the crushed ice. Otherwise the spinning blades create an air pocket at the bottom of the ice and nothing happens.
I had made hundreds of these drinks before, it's not rocket science. But of course I managed to fuck this one up.
So while the blades are spinning uselessly doing nothing other than making an annoying racket, I took a bar spoon and tried to coax the ingredients to blend.
Now due to being a clumsy oaf and half out of it I managed to drop the spoon into the blender, which collided with the furiously spinning blades and POW.

Frozen strawberry daiquiri everywhere.

While his two companions managed to avoid most of the explosion, Dreesen was not so lucky. I looked to my horror and saw that his previously spotless white (I shit you not) Member's Only jacket was now covered in concentrated frozen strawberries and daiquiri mix.

Now as much as I would like to say that he was a total dick about the situation, as he had every right to be, that was not the case. I offered to get the manager and assured him that we would pay for whatever cleaning or replacement that would be necessary. He assured me not to worry about it and they quickly decided to get the hell out of there and as far away from me as possible.

So every time that talentless, coattail riding, has been shows up at a Cubs game I take pleasure in actually having accomplished a direct assault upon him that the rest of you can only dream of.

[PenPho]

I suppose this is as good a place as any to tell my Tom Dreesen story.
While not nearly as epic as Slaky's bathroom story I'm going to tell it anyway.

This happened around 1983, which would make flannj 24 years old.
I was working during the day at the Board of Trade and tending bar weekday nights and held another bartending job on weekends.
In addition, I was dealing with the complexities of trying to keep the girl I was living with from finding out about my dalliances with the future Mrs. flannj.
Needles to say I was burning the candle at both ends.
Which meant I was a bit of a zombie. This is important to the story.

One of the bartending jobs I had was at Bones, a Lettuce Entertain You restaurant in Lincolnwood.
I was working on a Sunday morning doing my prep work, the place was empty as it was about a half hour before we opened.
Three people walked in, two guys and a woman, and I recognize one of the men as Tom Dreesen.
The other guy appeared to be a friend and the woman seemed to be his agent.
I recognized Dreesen from TV. Most likely the Tonight Show, and given that at that time my comedic interest ran more to George Carlin, Emo Phillips, and Sam Kinison I knew him to be the unfunny fuck that he remains today.

The three of them walked to the bar and I asked if I could get them anything. Dreesen and the other guy declined but the woman asked for a virgin strawberry daiquiri.
I set about making the drink in the blender directly in front of them.
They were going over some notes comparing different comedy clubs in the Chicago area. At one point Dreesen asked me if I could recommend any clubs other than Zanie's.
Now given my exhausted state Zanie's was all I could think of and like a moron I replied "Uh, well there's always Zanie's".

They stared at me and I returned to making the drink.

Now when making a frozen blended drink the order in which the ingredients go into  the blender is key.
Put the wet ingredients in first followed by the crushed ice. Otherwise the spinning blades create an air pocket at the bottom of the ice and nothing happens.
I had made hundreds of these drinks before, it's not rocket science. But of course I managed to fuck this one up.
So while the blades are spinning uselessly doing nothing other than making an annoying racket, I took a bar spoon and tried to coax the ingredients to blend.
Now due to being a clumsy oaf and half out of it I managed to drop the spoon into the blender, which collided with the furiously spinning blades and POW.

Frozen strawberry daiquiri everywhere.

While his two companions managed to avoid most of the explosion, Dreesen was not so lucky. I looked to my horror and saw that his previously spotless white (I shit you not) Member's Only jacket was now covered in concentrated frozen strawberries and daiquiri mix.

Now as much as I would like to say that he was a total dick about the situation, as he had every right to be, that was not the case. I offered to get the manager and assured him that we would pay for whatever cleaning or replacement that would be necessary. He assured me not to worry about it and they quickly decided to get the hell out of there and as far away from me as possible.

So every time that talentless, coattail riding, has been shows up at a Cubs game I take pleasure in actually having accomplished a direct assault upon him that the rest of you can only dream of.

I love approximately 100% of your posts.

[Bort]

I applaud flannj for being everything good and proper in the world.

[Chuck to Chuck]

Next time I go to L. Wood Tap, I'll laugh the second I see the bar.