Totally Unlistenable

[Bort]

I can't remember the last time I listened to a presidential debate on the radio, but no baseball is no baseball.

I am reminded, though, of the one season I spent in the high-school "forensic" debate team. Both I and my partner were complete neophytes, I a senior and she, I think, a sophomore.

It's a bizarre sport in its most well trained versions, with people going to camps and speed-talking and, G-d help us all, judges. To some surprise, our rookie team made it to state competition the year that the death penalty was the "resolution." Apparently, extemporaneous speech was some sort of novelty. Maybe it was some sort of class hostility with the Lincoln-Douglas types.

But anyway, right after the Billy Madison moment that was the early "role models" question, I was shaking my head at the two minutes wasted for failure to even be able to free-associate in the rebuttal. Prep? Click. I tuned out for about 50 minutes, and it was still totally devoid of wit or character. It's Philip Glass v. Philip Glass.

Broadcast debatestinks are terrible.

I couldn't agree with you more Wheezer.
This has nothing to do with debate.

<-- (Toastmasters and Debate in High School as well)

I, to, was a speech fag.  Outside of one year where I also competed (poorly) in Special Occasion Speaking, my event was Radio Speaking (also poorly) which kind of put me on the outside of the more dramatic competitors, and alongside those Extemporaneous Speaking dorks.   I do have a long story about the one time I finished 1st in an event, though.

Makes sense.  On the radio, no-one can see you spell.

I laughed.

I did the speech thing briefly. Original Oratory and Impromptu. Basically a chance for me to do shitty high school open mic standup. Also, a way to get out of certain classes and just dick around with my friends in the coach's classroom, because she didn't give a fuck.

[Wheezer]

Santo was a beloved Hall of Famer who was everyone's grandpa. Most of us either grew up with him on the radio or grew up watching him play. He also came from a time when no one expected actual analysis from front offices let alone radio booths.

Are you kidding? The amount of Santo-on-radio loathing that I've encountered here defies my abilities to come up with either a metaphor or simile (although I showed up for an 8 a.m. extended EEG only to find that I'm talented at screwing up dates, or something).

Coomer was the fat Chris Coghlan of the 2001 Cubs. He wasn't even the most beloved 2001 Cub Who Looks Like He Should Be Playing Beer League Softball. That was Matt Stairs.

See above. (I was surprised when I finally looked up a photo, which didn't really match up with my image from the pipes, but see below.)

I'm disinclined to give him a pass for being terrible, and so his manufactured folksy personality and inability to add anything other than "aww shucks" crap to broadcasts is annoying

See above.

and every time I want to give color man Ron Coomer a pass I have to spend an inning screaming "WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED" at play-by-play Ron Coomer.

I shouldn't have to state that radio is the theater of the mind. The thing, though, is that, try as one might to ZORP one's way out of it, so is a game. So is a season. I've never had any problem figuring out what was happening in the 5th, and I have the complete Our Gang/Little Rascals on VHS, so I'm not chasing goalposts.

[Quality Start Machine]

I can't remember the last time I listened to a presidential debate on the radio, but no baseball is no baseball.

I am reminded, though, of the one season I spent in the high-school "forensic" debate team. Both I and my partner were complete neophytes, I a senior and she, I think, a sophomore.

It's a bizarre sport in its most well trained versions, with people going to camps and speed-talking and, G-d help us all, judges. To some surprise, our rookie team made it to state competition the year that the death penalty was the "resolution." Apparently, extemporaneous speech was some sort of novelty. Maybe it was some sort of class hostility with the Lincoln-Douglas types.

But anyway, right after the Billy Madison moment that was the early "role models" question, I was shaking my head at the two minutes wasted for failure to even be able to free-associate in the rebuttal. Prep? Click. I tuned out for about 50 minutes, and it was still totally devoid of wit or character. It's Philip Glass v. Philip Glass.

Broadcast debatestinks are terrible.

I couldn't agree with you more Wheezer.
This has nothing to do with debate.

<-- (Toastmasters and Debate in High School as well)

I, to, was a speech fag.  Outside of one year where I also competed (poorly) in Special Occasion Speaking, my event was Radio Speaking (also poorly) which kind of put me on the outside of the more dramatic competitors, and alongside those Extemporaneous Speaking dorks.   I do have a long story about the one time I finished 1st in an event, though.

Makes sense.  On the radio, no-one can see you spell.

I laughed.

I did the speech thing briefly. Original Oratory and Impromptu. Basically a chance for me to do shitty high school open mic standup. Also, a way to get out of certain classes and just dick around with my friends in the coach's classroom, because she didn't give a fuck.

I did college radio and occasionally tell stories on stage. What are we doing now?

[Oleg]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

[SKO]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

[Bort]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

I vaguely remember a time when Steve Stone was considered fairly knowledgeable. You either die a hero, or live long enough to become a washed up old crank.

[CT III]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

I vaguely remember a time when Steve Stone was considered fairly knowledgeable. You either die a hero, or live long enough to become a washed up old crank.

I know which one I'm planning on doing.

[thehawk]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

I vaguely remember a time when Steve Stone was considered fairly knowledgeable. You either die a hero, or live long enough to become a washed up old crank.

I know which one I'm planning on doing.

planning on doing?

[Shooter]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Why would anyone listen to Chris Russo other than by accident?

[Oleg]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Why would anyone listen to Chris Russo other than by accident?

I was driving and it's Yom Kippur.  Consider it my atoning.

[Yeti]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

Well, there was also the Hawk "Kris Bryant is no Todd Frazier defensively" thing

[SKO]

Just reporting that Screamin' Chris Russo thinks The Cubs are a poor defensive team (6 errors! if you count the one that wasn't really an error on the double-play ball) and are not really great because the teams left in the post-season are all flawed.

Then he had JD on and JD pretty much told him to get bent.

Steve Stone was also insistent earlier in the year that the Cubs did not have a good defense, as he pretended to only know what Defensive Runs Saved meant when it was bolstering his EATON FOR MVP case back in April.

Well, there was also the Hawk "Kris Bryant is no Todd Frazier defensively" thing

Topped only by him citing home run and RBI totals for why Frazier was basically the same player as Bryant.

[Wheezer]

Have I already bitched about the audio quality on these ESPN 1000 broadcasts, or just the announcers? It sounds like it's coming out of a tin can, and I can hardly compensate with a freaking Panasonic RF-2200. I can't tell whether it's companded or just compressed. This is poor utilization of 10 kHz audio bandwidth, assuming they're using what's allowed.

[CBStew]

In what universe is Joe Buck a play by play man?

[Canadouche]

Our old friend Chip Caray will be joining the broadcast team for the World Series.