Twatheads Twittering

[SKO]

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

Sometimes Justin Grimm will search his own name and favorite your tweets complaining about him but that's kind of on him. Don't do that, Justin.

Otherwise don't tweet at athletes that they suck unless you are responding to a tweet of theirs where they are being an asshole or something. At best you'll merely get owned like poor, simple Huard. At worst you just show the world that you are a major asshole who cannot separate sports from real life.

[Eli]

Huey feeling butthurt about getting his ass owned to the maximum extent allowed by law makes this even more enjoyable.

I'm still not cognizant enough of the nuances your pajama party to feel like I was owned, sorry if that strikes you as obtuse...I mean, does Jason Hammel's strong start to the season erase the fact that he was ass in the second half of last year, thus covering my face in yolky goodness?  Seems as though his second half of 2016 hasn't even begun, so I think it might be a bit premature to think he's owning me based on the last 10 weeks.  I would volunteer that it might be a bit premature for this guy to be crowing to his haters at this juncture but hey--you're the Twitter experts so if you say I've been owned and that I'm asshurt I guess it must be true.

I am not a Twitter ownage expert (as I have never been owned myself), but I think it's more the fact that Jason Hammel appears to have noticed your insult and responded to it by pointing out that you still follow him on Twitter.

And that's what qualifies as an owning?  Jesus, Twitter is gayer than high school.

I didn't know folks were supposed to stop following people after they publicly insulted them.  I think I need to unfollow like half the people I follow now.

Look, I don't make the rules. I just speculate on what they are.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

Sometimes Justin Grimm will search his own name and favorite your tweets complaining about him but that's kind of on him. Don't do that, Justin.

Otherwise don't tweet at athletes that they suck unless you are responding to a tweet of theirs where they are being an asshole or something. At best you'll merely get owned like poor, simple Huard. At worst you just show the world that you are a major asshole who cannot separate sports from real life.

In my defense, I was still really angry about Hammel's second-half performance last season (and white-hot livid at his inability to remotely salvage it with his final outing vs. the Mets), I was assuming he wouldn't even be on the team in 2016 and was angry to see him enjoying life like a normal human being.  Yes, that's my defense.

Truth is, I like Hammel--he does seem like a good dude and I was obviously being a petulantly frustrated turd in January.  That I'll own. I'm not going to be some SKOward and delete it, even if I'm not proud of it now (although a small part of me feels it was a decent--if completely assholeish--burn).  I truly hope that Hammel genuinely owns me (as opposed to a fake-assed playground Twitter owning) by shoving it up my hiney with a balls-out second half.  I would be fine with that.

[Eli]

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

Sometimes Justin Grimm will search his own name and favorite your tweets complaining about him but that's kind of on him. Don't do that, Justin.

Otherwise don't tweet at athletes that they suck unless you are responding to a tweet of theirs where they are being an asshole or something. At best you'll merely get owned like poor, simple Huard. At worst you just show the world that you are a major asshole who cannot separate sports from real life.

As insane as you can be on Twitter, this is generally a very good rule. There's not a lot of upside in tweeting something mean directly at an athlete over their performance. If they're out there name searching, that's their own fault.

[Grandmaster Wang]

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

My approach is that I don't even follow athletes on Twitter at all (or celebrities in general, actually, with the rare comedian being the exception.) I've tried, but I've never come across a single athlete's/celebrity's Twitter account that was even remotely worth following full-time. Jose Canseco and the Iron Sheik are about the closest it gets for me, and I eventually unfollowed them both. It just seems to me that the smart ones use social media pretty much solely for marketing/branding and self-aggrandizement, which is simultaneously boring and annoying. And the dumb ones are... well... dumb. And if somebody drops some kind of Twitter Bomb that's actually entertaining or otherwise spectacular, I'm about 99% sure that some regular person I follow will retweet or reply to it soon enough, and I'll only be a few minutes late finding out there's doins a-transpirin'.

[Bort]

If they're out there name searching, that's their own fault.

True story: I once joking bitched about my never forgiving Mitch Williams for giving up that final hit to Will Clark in 1989 on a music message board, and literally 3 years later, a guy claiming to be Mitch Williams brother found that post and went off on a tear about how I couldn't complain about that because I never played the game professionally. That's a level of weird insecurity that I cannot imagine having. It wasn't even Mitch. It was a guy who may or may not have been related to him.

[Bort]

DPD

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

My approach is that I don't even follow athletes on Twitter at all (or celebrities in general, actually, with the rare comedian being the exception.) I've tried, but I've never come across a single athlete's/celebrity's Twitter account that was even remotely worth following full-time. Jose Canseco and the Iron Sheik are about the closest it gets for me, and I eventually unfollowed them both. It just seems to me that the smart ones use social media pretty much solely for marketing/branding and self-aggrandizement, which is simultaneously boring and annoying. And the dumb ones are... well... dumb. And if somebody drops some kind of Twitter Bomb that's actually entertaining or otherwise spectacular, I'm about 99% sure that some regular person I follow will retweet or reply to it soon enough, and I'll only be a few minutes late finding out there's doins a-transpirin'.

100% agreed. If Twitter has taught me anything, it's not to have any expectations that anyone in the public eye will have anything interesting to say. Even the ones that seem smart.

[SKO]

DPD

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

My approach is that I don't even follow athletes on Twitter at all (or celebrities in general, actually, with the rare comedian being the exception.) I've tried, but I've never come across a single athlete's/celebrity's Twitter account that was even remotely worth following full-time. Jose Canseco and the Iron Sheik are about the closest it gets for me, and I eventually unfollowed them both. It just seems to me that the smart ones use social media pretty much solely for marketing/branding and self-aggrandizement, which is simultaneously boring and annoying. And the dumb ones are... well... dumb. And if somebody drops some kind of Twitter Bomb that's actually entertaining or otherwise spectacular, I'm about 99% sure that some regular person I follow will retweet or reply to it soon enough, and I'll only be a few minutes late finding out there's doins a-transpirin'.

100% agreed. If Twitter has taught me anything, it's not to have any expectations that anyone in the public eye will have anything interesting to say. Even the ones that seem smart.

Jake Arrieta rules. Dan Haren is a good follow especially now that he is retired and can spout off about anything. That concludes my list of athletes worth following.

[SKO]

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

Sometimes Justin Grimm will search his own name and favorite your tweets complaining about him but that's kind of on him. Don't do that, Justin.

Otherwise don't tweet at athletes that they suck unless you are responding to a tweet of theirs where they are being an asshole or something. At best you'll merely get owned like poor, simple Huard. At worst you just show the world that you are a major asshole who cannot separate sports from real life.

In my defense, I was still really angry about Hammel's second-half performance last season (and white-hot livid at his inability to remotely salvage it with his final outing vs. the Mets), I was assuming he wouldn't even be on the team in 2016 and was angry to see him enjoying life like a normal human being.  Yes, that's my defense.

Truth is, I like Hammel--he does seem like a good dude and I was obviously being a petulantly frustrated turd in January.  That I'll own. I'm not going to be some SKOward and delete it, even if I'm not proud of it now (although a small part of me feels it was a decent--if completely assholeish--burn).  I truly hope that Hammel genuinely owns me (as opposed to a fake-assed playground Twitter owning) by shoving it up my hiney with a balls-out second half.  I would be fine with that.

if he can continue to just be what he has been (assuming his ERA and FIP eventually start to meet in the middle at around 3.50) or whatever, I'll take it as the #5, as it stands right now my guess is the playoff rotation would actually be Arrieta/Lester/Lackey/Hendricks, with the bullpen monster of Aroldis Chapman, Andrew Miller, Sean Doolittle, Bruce Sutter, Mariano Rivera, Trevor Hoffman, Pedro Strop, and Rondon ready to go the second Hendricks shows any signs of struggling with the second or third time through the order.

[Eli]

DPD

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

My approach is that I don't even follow athletes on Twitter at all (or celebrities in general, actually, with the rare comedian being the exception.) I've tried, but I've never come across a single athlete's/celebrity's Twitter account that was even remotely worth following full-time. Jose Canseco and the Iron Sheik are about the closest it gets for me, and I eventually unfollowed them both. It just seems to me that the smart ones use social media pretty much solely for marketing/branding and self-aggrandizement, which is simultaneously boring and annoying. And the dumb ones are... well... dumb. And if somebody drops some kind of Twitter Bomb that's actually entertaining or otherwise spectacular, I'm about 99% sure that some regular person I follow will retweet or reply to it soon enough, and I'll only be a few minutes late finding out there's doins a-transpirin'.

100% agreed. If Twitter has taught me anything, it's not to have any expectations that anyone in the public eye will have anything interesting to say. Even the ones that seem smart.

Jake Arrieta rules. Dan Haren is a good follow especially now that he is retired and can spout off about anything. That concludes my list of athletes worth following.

I don't even follow Arrieta because it mostly looks like a lot of sponsor promotion. I think I follow Haren and Brandon McCarthy. I think that's the entire list.

[Bort]

DPD

As big of an asshole as I am on twitter my one rule is pretty much never directly tweet at an athlete. As far as I'm concerned they aren't real people when I am bitching about them. Jason Hammel is not actually a bad person if he gives up 4 runs in a game, so I show basic humanity and don't tweet directly at him that he sucks.

My approach is that I don't even follow athletes on Twitter at all (or celebrities in general, actually, with the rare comedian being the exception.) I've tried, but I've never come across a single athlete's/celebrity's Twitter account that was even remotely worth following full-time. Jose Canseco and the Iron Sheik are about the closest it gets for me, and I eventually unfollowed them both. It just seems to me that the smart ones use social media pretty much solely for marketing/branding and self-aggrandizement, which is simultaneously boring and annoying. And the dumb ones are... well... dumb. And if somebody drops some kind of Twitter Bomb that's actually entertaining or otherwise spectacular, I'm about 99% sure that some regular person I follow will retweet or reply to it soon enough, and I'll only be a few minutes late finding out there's doins a-transpirin'.

100% agreed. If Twitter has taught me anything, it's not to have any expectations that anyone in the public eye will have anything interesting to say. Even the ones that seem smart.

Jake Arrieta rules. Dan Haren is a good follow especially now that he is retired and can spout off about anything. That concludes my list of athletes worth following.

I don't even follow Arrieta because it mostly looks like a lot of sponsor promotion. I think I follow Haren and Brandon McCarthy. I think that's the entire list.

I think I still follow McCarthy. That's about it.

[Yeti]

If they're out there name searching, that's their own fault.

True story: I once joking bitched about my never forgiving Mitch Williams for giving up that final hit to Will Clark in 1989 on a music message board, and literally 3 years later, a guy claiming to be Mitch Williams brother found that post and went off on a tear about how I couldn't complain about that because I never played the game professionally. That's a level of weird insecurity that I cannot imagine having. It wasn't even Mitch. It was a guy who may or may not have been related to him.

Um, only site, dude

[flannj]

How about get the hell off of Twitter?

[Eli]

How about get the hell off of Twitter?

And do what?

[ChuckD]

How about get the hell off of Twitter?

And do what?

why can't y'all just use this website we already have @ desipio dot com