2009-10 Bears Season: Utler, 'Uther 'Uckers

[CT III]

As long as I am on the subject of how little I understand the game, I see that Tommie Harris gets fined $7,500 for punching someone in the face.  Cutler gets fined $20,000 for verbally abusing someone.  Why didn't Cutler just punch the official in the face?  It would have been much cheaper, and far more satisfying.

The disparity is a total joke--but it's also patently offensive that anyone would be fined $20,000 for what they said.  There's no way an NFL official's psyche or authority is worth that much money.  There's no way their collective authority is worth that much.

I'm convinced that one of these days you're going to post something that makes my eyes roll completely around in my head. 

[CubFaninHydePark]

As long as I am on the subject of how little I understand the game, I see that Tommie Harris gets fined $7,500 for punching someone in the face.  Cutler gets fined $20,000 for verbally abusing someone.  Why didn't Cutler just punch the official in the face?  It would have been much cheaper, and far more satisfying.

The disparity is a total joke--but it's also patently offensive that anyone would be fined $20,000 for what they said.  There's no way an NFL official's psyche or authority is worth that much money.  There's no way their collective authority is worth that much.

I'm convinced that one of these days you're going to post something that makes my eyes roll completely around in my head. 

That'd be a pretty neat trick--you could win a talent show or join the circus or something with that.

[flannj]

Statfaggotry says Brad Maynard should be out of a job.

Maybe if the Bears were a high school team...

Pulaski hasn't punted since 2007 (when it did so as a gesture of sportsmanship in a lopsided game), and here's why: "The average punt in high school nets you 30 yards, but we convert around half our fourth downs, so it doesn't make sense to give up the ball..."

And in that case, Gould would be out, too.

/internet buzzkill

Bill Belichick believes in the football statfaggotry

[Internet Apex]

Statfaggotry says Brad Maynard should be out of a job.

Maybe if the Bears were a high school team...

Pulaski hasn't punted since 2007 (when it did so as a gesture of sportsmanship in a lopsided game), and here's why: "The average punt in high school nets you 30 yards, but we convert around half our fourth downs, so it doesn't make sense to give up the ball..."

And in that case, Gould would be out, too.

/internet buzzkill

Bill Belichick believes in the football statfaggotry

I was pretty shocked at the time but I'm starting to realize that Belichick's gamble wasn't as risky as it seemed. I truly believe the Colts could and would have scored a TD from any starting position at that point. I am still surprised at how brazenly the Pats burned up their timeouts with such a slight lead, however. I bet you that's their greater regret this morning. If they had only left themselves more time, this could have played out completely differently. What a game, though.

[R-V]

Statfaggotry says Brad Maynard should be out of a job.

Maybe if the Bears were a high school team...

Pulaski hasn't punted since 2007 (when it did so as a gesture of sportsmanship in a lopsided game), and here's why: "The average punt in high school nets you 30 yards, but we convert around half our fourth downs, so it doesn't make sense to give up the ball..."

And in that case, Gould would be out, too.

/internet buzzkill

Bill Belichick believes in the football statfaggotry

I was pretty shocked at the time but I'm starting to realize that Belichick's gamble wasn't as risky as it seemed. I truly believe the Colts could and would have scored a TD from any starting position at that point. I am still surprised at how brazenly the Pats burned up their timeouts with such a slight lead, however. I bet you that's their greater regret this morning. If they had only left themselves more time, this could have played out completely differently. What a game, though.

That. Hell of a game indeed. I want Reggie Wayne on the Bears. And Randy Moss. And the Patriots interior line. And Freeney and Mathis. And Jerod Mayo. And Antoine Bethea. Any way we could get that done?

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

Even with all that Lovie and his dunderheads would find a way to fuck it up.

[BC]

"If they had only left themselves more time, this could have played out completely differently."

Apex... Do you know how many times I have said that about something that happened in MY life?

[Dr. Nguyen Van Falk]

Apparently this is not a joke...

http://www.chicagobreakingsports.com/2009/11/grossmans-dad-rips-bears-history-of-qb-failure.html

Rex Grossman's father came out firing today when asked to assess the Bears' ongoing quarterback woes with Jay Cutler and draw a comparison to the checkered Chicago career of his son.

Dan Grossman, an ophthalmologist who practices in Bloomington, Ind., berated the Bears for their long history of futility at the quarterback position.

"What's amazing to me is, here we go again with Jay Cutler," Grossman said. "He came in and he was going to be the franchise quarterback and lead the Bears. I heard some people say they were going to the Super Bowl this year. There was a lot of Cutler-mania going on in the preseason and all that. And here we are, back in the situation where ... because the team is not really built around a passing game, he has struggled. I don't really blame it on Jay Cutler."

Cutler has thrown 17 interceptions in the Bears' first nine games, including five last Thursday night in San Francisco. Rex Grossman is now a backup quarterback with the Houston Texans.

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Grossman believes the root of the problem is the Bears' traditional reliance on the running game.

"I believe that the NFL is a passing league,'' he said. "It has been for the last 20 years. Chicago continues to use the phrase, at least Lovie Smith continues to use the phrase, 'We get off the bus running.' I think they need to abandon that concept.

"Running is obviously a very important part of the offense. But the best teams in this league are prolific passing teams. And they have been for years. You can't name me a really great team in the last 10-20 years that hasn't had a passing component that was a very important part of it. And for a team to be effective at passing, you have to build your offense around your quarterback. You have to commit to the quarterback: 'You're our guy.' And then you have to build the offense around the quarterback. Not the other way around. You don't bring your quarterback in and say: 'We're going to get off the bus running. But on third-and-10, you've got to come through for us now!'

"The successful teams have brought in a quarterback, have surrounded him with excellent linemen, receivers and running backs. Once that quarterback becomes quite confident and comfortable with the system -- depending on their skill level -- they can flourish."

A quarterback, plus excellent linemen, receivers and running backs equals football success, depending on the QB's skill level.

Also: defense wins championships and you can never have enough touchdowns.

For more on this story, see Tuesday's Chicago Tribune.

[Saul Goodman]

Apparently this is not a joke...

http://www.chicagobreakingsports.com/2009/11/grossmans-dad-rips-bears-history-of-qb-failure.html

Rex Grossman's father came out firing today when asked to assess the Bears' ongoing quarterback woes with Jay Cutler and draw a comparison to the checkered Chicago career of his son.

Dan Grossman, an ophthalmologist who practices in Bloomington, Ind., berated the Bears for their long history of futility at the quarterback position.

"What's amazing to me is, here we go again with Jay Cutler," Grossman said. "He came in and he was going to be the franchise quarterback and lead the Bears. I heard some people say they were going to the Super Bowl this year. There was a lot of Cutler-mania going on in the preseason and all that. And here we are, back in the situation where ... because the team is not really built around a passing game, he has struggled. I don't really blame it on Jay Cutler."

Cutler has thrown 17 interceptions in the Bears' first nine games, including five last Thursday night in San Francisco. Rex Grossman is now a backup quarterback with the Houston Texans.

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Grossman believes the root of the problem is the Bears' traditional reliance on the running game.

"I believe that the NFL is a passing league,'' he said. "It has been for the last 20 years. Chicago continues to use the phrase, at least Lovie Smith continues to use the phrase, 'We get off the bus running.' I think they need to abandon that concept.

"Running is obviously a very important part of the offense. But the best teams in this league are prolific passing teams. And they have been for years. You can't name me a really great team in the last 10-20 years that hasn't had a passing component that was a very important part of it. And for a team to be effective at passing, you have to build your offense around your quarterback. You have to commit to the quarterback: 'You're our guy.' And then you have to build the offense around the quarterback. Not the other way around. You don't bring your quarterback in and say: 'We're going to get off the bus running. But on third-and-10, you've got to come through for us now!'

"The successful teams have brought in a quarterback, have surrounded him with excellent linemen, receivers and running backs. Once that quarterback becomes quite confident and comfortable with the system -- depending on their skill level -- they can flourish."

A quarterback, plus excellent linemen, receivers and running backs equals football success, depending on the QB's skill level.

Also: defense wins championships and you can never have enough touchdowns.

For more on this story, see Tuesday's Chicago Tribune.

HIRE DANNY GROSSMAN!!!!

[Eli]

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Who is he talking about?

[SKO]

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Who is he talking about?

KYLE ORTON, ESTOOPID!....and...umm...Jim Harbaugh? Those are the only one's I can think of.

[Chuck to Chuck]

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Who is he talking about?

McMahon had good games with San Diego and won a Super Bowl with Green Bay, if I recall.  Erik Kramer had a few good games before he got here.  Mike Tomczak actually had a career of 16 years, and he got to fuck Julianne McCullough.

That last bit counts as a great deal of success tome.  It also shows how low standards some women have.

[Slaky]

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Who is he talking about?

McMahon had good games with San Diego and won a Super Bowl with Green Bay, if I recall.  Erik Kramer had a few good games before he got here.  Mike Tomczak actually had a career of 16 years, and he got to fuck Julianne McCullough.

That last bit counts as a great deal of success tome.  It also shows how low standards some women have.

I just googled that name and it's either not a real person or it's your neighbor.

[Chuck to Chuck]

"Obviously, the last 20-something quarterbacks that have played in Chicago have not all been complete failures as quarterbacks," Dan Grossman said. "They obviously played somewhere before Chicago in order to be on that team. And several of them played respectably well after leaving that team. To me, there's an inherent organizational problem with the quarterback position."

Who is he talking about?

McMahon had good games with San Diego and won a Super Bowl with Green Bay, if I recall.  Erik Kramer had a few good games before he got here.  Mike Tomczak actually had a career of 16 years, and he got to fuck Julianne McCullough.

That last bit counts as a great deal of success tome.  It also shows how low standards some women have.

I just googled that name and it's either not a real person or it's your neighbor.

Whoops.  I meant Julie McCullough.  She's on the right.

[WTB...A RING FFS!!]

So disappointed Chuck. How did you not immediately find the Playboy cover of Julie to post? Or at least make a bad reference to her FINE acting skills as the babysitter on Growing Pains, lol.