I admit it...

[Internet Apex]

... I could have gotten stoned with the new, smoking-hot neighbor, but I instead did the dishes and sent a complaint to Milt suggesting that he was pulling Heraclitus quotes out his ass.

How did BC get Wheezer's ID?

Did he graze her ass?

If the smoking hot neighbor has a boyfriend or a gang of rotten kids, this makes perfect sense to me.

I capped off the performance by dropping a pencil sharpener on my foot and presumably fracturing my little toe.

That's what you get for putting a pencil sharpener in a bowling ball.

It's an integral part of the telephone. Oleg can confirm.

Which?  The pencil sharpener, the bowling ball or your toe?

The pencil sharpener. You'd have to have some pretty questionable judgment to use a bowling ball.

Obviously.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'm happy for LeBron.

[Saul Goodman]

I'm happy for LeBron.

LeBron's making plenty of money on endorsements. So he can get by on shorter contracts. I'd like to see him become basketball's ultimate mercenary. One or two year deals. He'd alternate between pissing off and delighting just about every fan base in the association. Take free agency to its extreme and claim his rightful crown as the troll genius king.

[Brownie]

I'm happy for LeBron.

Campared with all of Miami's other world champion teams, the Heat are very unhate-able.

I rooted against them the whole way, but like Huey said, I'm happy for them.

[Internet Apex]

I'm happy for LeBron.

LeBron's making plenty of money on endorsements. So he can get by on shorter contracts. I'd like to see him become basketball's ultimate mercenary. One or two year deals. He'd alternate between pissing off and delighting just about every fan base in the association. Take free agency to its extreme and claim his rightful crown as the troll genius king.

Irrational butthurt is good for business.

[flannj]

Irrational butthurt is good for business.

That's what makes the world go 'round.

(as well as powering this message board)

[Wheezer]

I'm happy for LeBron.

LeBron's making plenty of money on endorsements. So he can get by on shorter contracts. I'd like to see him become basketball's ultimate mercenary. One or two year deals. He'd alternate between pissing off and delighting just about every fan base in the association. Take free agency to its extreme and claim his rightful crown as the troll genius king.

Irrational butthurt is good for business.

In this regard, I commend to you the stark raving irrational butthurt of Tara Carreon.

[Saul Goodman]

I'm happy for LeBron.

LeBron's making plenty of money on endorsements. So he can get by on shorter contracts. I'd like to see him become basketball's ultimate mercenary. One or two year deals. He'd alternate between pissing off and delighting just about every fan base in the association. Take free agency to its extreme and claim his rightful crown as the troll genius king.

Irrational butthurt is good for business.

In this regard, I commend to you the stark raving irrational butthurt of Tara Carreon.

Wow, what a nutjob.

[PenPho]

...I previously thought that we had reached the apex of hilarity of this meme. 

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Darwin Barney is a far more useful player than I ever would have expected.

 

[PenPho]

Darwin Barney is a far more useful player than I ever would have expected.

Eli tried to tell you!

[Internet Apex]

Darwin Barney is a far more useful player than I ever would have expected.

Eli tried to tell you!

So you say. But who can understand that guy's accent?

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

Darwin Barney is a far more useful player than I ever would have expected.

Eli tried to tell you!

I know he did, and I mocked him for it.  This is why this confessional thread exists.

[PenPho]

Darwin Barney is a far more useful player than I ever would have expected.

Eli tried to tell you!

I know he did, and I mocked him for it.  This is why this confessional thread exists.

This remains my favorite thread on this site.

[Wheezer]

Well, I've got that item checked off my list. I have no idea how she can put away the Lesser Sacrament like that. At one point, she thought the Neo-American Church was founded in the 1600s. (Three possible new members, though.)