I admit it...

[Tonker]

.. the first thing I am going to do after the boy is in bed and the Hawks win tonight is pour a tall glass of single malt Scotch. The second thing I'm going to do, weather permitting, is take it outside and start a nice toasty fire in my outdoor fireplace. But the third thing I am going to do is pull up the archived broadcast of today's game and luxuriate in Ken Harrelson's call of every one of Dioner Navarro's home runs.

Hate to ruin this for you but Steve Stone did the PbP today. No Hawk.

Did hawk jump off a bridge or something?

Oo, TJ... don't tease.

[Brownie]

.. the first thing I am going to do after the boy is in bed and the Hawks win tonight is pour a tall glass of single malt Scotch. The second thing I'm going to do, weather permitting, is take it outside and start a nice toasty fire in my outdoor fireplace. But the third thing I am going to do is pull up the archived broadcast of today's game and luxuriate in Ken Harrelson's call of every one of Dioner Navarro's home runs.

Hate to ruin this for you but Steve Stone did the PbP today. No Hawk.

Did hawk jump off a bridge or something?

Oo, TJ... don't tease.

Word comes in that Hawk had a sore throat. Clearly, he lacks TWTW. I know what the Sabremetric numbers say, he's really behind the White Sox, moreso than any announcer is behind his team. But when the Sox faithful needed him most IN THAT BOOTH, holding down the fort, displaying that SOX PRIDE! And sulking in silence glaring at Stone as he describes all of John Danks' hanging curveballs.

Ken Harrelson obviously lacks the grit and grinderism celebrated on the South Side.

[Quality Start Machine]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

[Bort]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

[Saul Goodman]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

[Slaky]

Guys, save it for the big day. Come on.

[Quality Start Machine]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

[Internet Apex]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

This lifetime is OVAH!!!

[CT III]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

This lifetime is OVAH!!!

*long sustained sulky silence*

[Saul Goodman]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

This lifetime is OVAH!!!

*long sustained sulky silence*

Darn Hawk and his conveniently timed "sore throat."

[Chuck to Chuck]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

This lifetime is OVAH!!!

You know who had the best funeral ever?  Yas.

[thehawk]

Easiest way to know if Hawk is alive or not is to see whether there's a 20-page Dead Pool thread that just started.

He Gone
The Good Guys Won
Can of Corpse

The Will To Rot
You Got To Be Bleepin' Me!  What Are You Doin', Reaper?!

Put him in the ground...YES!

This lifetime is OVAH!!!

You know who had the best funeral ever?  Yas.

Time to hold the post-game show.

[Quality Start Machine]

The pallbearers wore batting gloves.

[Tonker]

The pallbearers wore batting gloves.

You know when you're realise that you're scraping the bottom of the barrel?  And you, sadly, understand in your heart of hearts that there really aren't any more decent gags to be made on a subject, and you get out while you're ahead, and enjoy the memories of what was?

Yeah, that.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

The pallbearers wore batting gloves.

You know when you're realise that you're scraping the bottom of the barrel?  And you, sadly, understand in your heart of hearts that there really aren't any more decent gags to be made on a subject, and you get out while you're ahead, and enjoy the memories of what was?

Yeah, that.

Ahem...

But that's how the batting glove got started. A lot of things, you know the stuff under my eyes and the foot off the ground – started all that stuff. Let's put it this way. I was not a person of inhibitions. It didn't bother me to do something out of the norm. In fact, I enjoyed it. You know when you're hitting 12, 15 home runs, they call you a flake. Then you go and hit 35 and that's charisma. That's the dangers of perception.