The Fuck You Carlos Silva thread

[R-V]

Here's what I've got so far: Ugueth Urbina is going to chop off your mom's head with a machete and then light you on fire.

Hey Carlos, your wife was just in a horrible accident. She's in a coma now.

[powen01]

Does Silva have a fiance with a pickup truck?

[Slaky]

Here's what I've got so far: Ugueth Urbina is going to chop off your mom's head with a machete and then light you on fire.

Hey Carlos, your wife was just in a horrible accident. She's in a coma now.

And then I had sex with her.

[R-V]

Here's what I've got so far: Ugueth Urbina is going to chop off your mom's head with a machete and then light you on fire.

Hey Carlos, your wife was just in a horrible accident. She's in a coma now.

And then I had sex with her.

Also, about your kids. Turns out Ruben Quevedo is the father.

[Indolent Reader]

Isn't all of your angst going to be taken care of by Carlos Z?  He won't stand it for it.  Oh no.

[Armchair_QB]

There is some Grade-A quality hatred going on here.

Well done fellas.

[Quality Start Machine]

I say we grab him, pants him, pour honey all over his buttcrack, taint and ballsack, then sit him bare-assed in a colony of fire ants.

[MAD]

Here's what I've got so far: Ugueth Urbina is going to chop off your mom's head with a machete and then light you on fire.

Hey Carlos, your wife was just in a horrible accident. She's in a coma now.

And then I had sex with her.

Also, about your kids. Turns out Ruben Quevedo Hector Villanueva is the father.

Slightly more biologically plausible'd.

[Eli]

So, I guess that instead of collecting 2nd basemen or left-handed hitters, Hendry is going to try and corner the market on fat guys named Carlos this year?

Carlos Lee is next.  All part of the plan.

[Oleg]

So, I guess that instead of collecting 2nd basemen or left-handed hitters, Hendry is going to try and corner the market on fat guys named Carlos this year?

Carlos Lee is next.  All part of the plan.

Just keep Mencia the fuck away from Chicago.

[Armchair_QB]

The Cubs don't by chance host the Mariners in interleague play next year do they?

[Slaky]

The Cubs don't by chance host the Mariners in interleague play next year do they?

Lucky for Milt, that series is in Seattle.

[Armchair_QB]

The Cubs don't by chance host the Mariners in interleague play next year do they?

Lucky for Milt, that series is in Seattle.

Damn, there would have been a LaTroy Hawkins Return-level of bile at Wrigley if the Mariners were in town this season.

[Internet Apex]

The Cubs don't by chance host the Mariners in interleague play next year do they?

Lucky for Milt, that series is in Seattle.

Damn, there would have been a LaTroy Hawkins Return-level of bile at Wrigley if the Mariners were in town this season.

Can you imagine that series at Wrigley if the Mariners ended up with DeRosa too? That God that won't happen. I would have to swear off baseball forever.

[Armchair_QB]

The Cubs don't by chance host the Mariners in interleague play next year do they?

Lucky for Milt, that series is in Seattle.

Damn, there would have been a LaTroy Hawkins Return-level of bile at Wrigley if the Mariners were in town this season.

Can you imagine that series at Wrigley if the Mariners ended up with DeRosa too? That God that won't happen. I would have to swear off baseball forever.

It'd be a slumpbuster convention.