The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread

[CubFaninHydePark]

With any luck, Carlos Silva will eat him.  But if that fails to happen, the serial killer is due back in a few weeks.  And then there's the burning barn that someone mentioned.

[Bort]

Samardzija is a piece of shitzija.

Also, fuck Notre Dame. Because this sack of shit went to ND we have to put up with this.

He should just cut his losses and switch to football.

Alternately, he could die after being locked in a burning barn.

Why would you want to ruin a perfectly good barn? We could use it to store our hate for the winter.

I already have plenty of HATESILOS.

[CT III]

Samardzija is a piece of shitzija.

Also, fuck Notre Dame. Because this sack of shit went to ND we have to put up with this.

He should just cut his losses and switch to football.

Alternately, he could die after being locked in a burning barn.

Why would you want to ruin a perfectly good barn? We could use it to store our hate for the winter.

I already have plenty of HATESILOS.

Besides, we can always get the Amish to raise us another one, English.

[Quality Start Machine]

Samardzija is a piece of shitzija.

Also, fuck Notre Dame. Because this sack of shit went to ND we have to put up with this.

He should just cut his losses and switch to football.

Alternately, he could die after being locked in a burning barn.

Why would you want to ruin a perfectly good barn? We could use it to store our hate for the winter.

I already have plenty of HATESILOS.

Besides, we can always get the Amish to raise us another one, English.

Aren't they all busy running puppy farms?

[Powdered Toast Man]

[Bort]

Okay, I've slept on this. Now I want the barn to not only be on fire but full of angry hornets.

[Quality Start Machine]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

[Yeti]

108



Z doesn't have the team's highest ERA! Joyful Positive!

[Powdered Toast Man]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

[Yeti]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in

[Bort]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

Either hop on the running boards of the HATEMOBILE, or get the hell out of the way.

[CT III]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

Either hop on the running boards of the HATEMOBILE, or get the hell out of the way.

I wanna sit in the rumble seat.

[Powdered Toast Man]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

Either hop on the running boards of the HATEMOBILE, or get the hell out of the way.

Hmmm...I REALLY like that HATEMOBILE.

[Bort]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

Either hop on the running boards of the HATEMOBILE, or get the hell out of the way.

I wanna sit in the rumble seat.

I'm not sure how it works, but somehow EVERY seat is the rumble seat.

[Quality Start Machine]

And how many fucking meatballs will be at Wrigley Field in their green Samardzija shirts?

I fucking hate this fucking team and 99% of those who support it.

Godmotherfucking dammit.

Cripes, man.  It's game 1.  Of 162.  I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.

He's sucked for two years. He's established a pattern of sucking.

He's a serial sucker.