The Jeff Samardzija Defenestration Thread

[Quality Start Machine]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

[Internet Apex]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

They're obviously friends. I don't think any fan should expect to get an objective observation on anything from a guy who spent his career politicking and making bffs with reporters hither and yon.

[BH]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

They're obviously friends. I don't think any fan should expect to get an objective observation on anything from a guy who spent his career politicking and making bffs with reporters hither and yon.

He watched him play football, if that's not an indication of future success in baseball, nothing is.

[CT III]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

They're obviously friends. I don't think any fan should expect to get an objective observation on anything from a guy who spent his career politicking and making bffs with reporters hither and yon.

I feel the same way about Kerm's relationship with Paul Sullivan.

[Quality Start Machine]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

They're obviously friends. I don't think any fan should expect to get an objective observation on anything from a guy who spent his career politicking and making bffs with reporters hither and yon.

He watched him play football, if that's not an indication of future success in baseball, nothing is.

Intrepid Readers: Every HS Football Coach In The World

Playing football is an indication of future success in LIFE!

Now go run another lap!

[Bort]

Fuck DeRosa. There's room in the Snork FIREBARN.

[Slaky]

I wish I could more accurately tell the story I heard from my dad who knows a guy that went to one of Samardzija's apparently legendary house parties. Said guy went to use the john and walked in on our projected staff ace projecting his ace's staff into some lady. Mid-coital thrust he told the guy to go ahead and do his business.

What a friendly guy.

[Brownie]

Fetch your pankfork, Bortles:

Former Cub Mark DeRosa believes the team would be wise to hold on to Jeff Samardzija.

The current MLB Network analyst joined Comcast SportsNet to discuss the starting pitcher's future and the overall landscape of the MLB winter meetings.

With numerous rumors going around regarding the Cubs possibly trading Samardzija before the start of next season, Luke Stuckmeyer asked DeRosa if the Cubs should keep Samardzija. 

"Absolutely I do, I think he's what you build your team around," DeRosa said. "I watched him play football and then when he signed with the Cubs, I remember first meeting him at the Cubs convention when he got called up. His presence in the clubhouse and his presence amongst guys who were much older than him, he fit right in. This guy is a killer. I love everything about him and I'd be hard pressed to believe that the Cubs will let him walk away unless they are just totally blown away [with a trade proposal]."

DeRo doesn't care for meaningless things like "throws strikes" or "gets people out".

They're obviously friends. I don't think any fan should expect to get an objective observation on anything from a guy who spent his career politicking and making bffs with reporters hither and yon.

He watched him play football, if that's not an indication of future success in baseball, nothing is.

THEY SHOULD GET JAY MCNOWN AND DAT JULIO PEPPER GUY TOO AND HIRE DITKER TO BE THERE COACH.

[CT III]

I wish I could more accurately tell the story I heard from my dad who knows a guy that went to one of Samardzija's apparently legendary house parties. Said guy went to use the john and walked in on our projected staff ace projecting his ace's staff into some lady. Mid-coital thrust he told the guy to go ahead and do his business.

What a friendly guy.

I'm going to steal this line and my only regret is that it's got a somewhat limited use.

[Quality Start Machine]

I wish I could more accurately tell the story I heard from my dad who knows a guy that went to one of Samardzija's apparently legendary house parties. Said guy went to use the john and walked in on our projected staff ace projecting his ace's staff into some lady. Mid-coital thrust he told the guy to go ahead and do his business.

What a friendly guy.

I'm going to steal this line and my only regret is that it's got a somewhat limited use.

He should write for a website.

[Slaky]

I wish I could more accurately tell the story I heard from my dad who knows a guy that went to one of Samardzija's apparently legendary house parties. Said guy went to use the john and walked in on our projected staff ace projecting his ace's staff into some lady. Mid-coital thrust he told the guy to go ahead and do his business.

What a friendly guy.

I'm going to steal this line and my only regret is that it's got a somewhat limited use.

He should write for a website.

Maybe even be on a podcast. That'd be cool.

[Quality Start Machine]

I wish I could more accurately tell the story I heard from my dad who knows a guy that went to one of Samardzija's apparently legendary house parties. Said guy went to use the john and walked in on our projected staff ace projecting his ace's staff into some lady. Mid-coital thrust he told the guy to go ahead and do his business.

What a friendly guy.

I'm going to steal this line and my only regret is that it's got a somewhat limited use.

He should write for a website.

Maybe even be on a podcast. That'd be cool.

As long as you're not Fro, you're good.

[Eli]

Jeff is crabby.

"This is an on-field issue for uniform personnel," Samardzija said Wednesday at U.S. Cellular Field. "That's all there is to it. I'm a grown man. I'm 29. I'm not a prospect or 22. I feel good. I think I'm grown up enough and responsible enough to understand when I can go and when I can't go.

[Bort]

Jeff is crabby.

"This is an on-field issue for uniform personnel," Samardzija said Wednesday at U.S. Cellular Field. "That's all there is to it. I'm a grown man. I'm 29. I'm not a prospect or 22. I feel good. I think I'm grown up enough and responsible enough to understand when I can go and when I can't go.

I hope his arm literally explodes on his first start after they trade him. I want a doctor to be picking shards of Snork's ulna out of his stupid frat boy face.

[Eli]

Jeff is crabby.

"This is an on-field issue for uniform personnel," Samardzija said Wednesday at U.S. Cellular Field. "That's all there is to it. I'm a grown man. I'm 29. I'm not a prospect or 22. I feel good. I think I'm grown up enough and responsible enough to understand when I can go and when I can't go.

I hope his arm literally explodes on his first start after they trade him. I want a doctor to be picking shards of Snork's ulna out of his stupid frat boy face.

It's a pretty dumb comment from him. But he's obviously frustrated and it's hard to blame him for that.