Haiku for Desipiots

[J. Walter Weatherman]

Front-running LeBron
Who trusts not his own talent
Jordan still greatest

I hope Jordan dies
He planned his fathers murder
In Hell together

That's not very nice.
I'm so sorry for my anger-
Still don't like the douche.

You lose this thread, just like the Bulls thread.

Fatigue, emptiness—
Interpreted correctly:
Loss of manly thread

/forTEC

[Tinker to Evers to Chance]

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads

I was drunk.

Also, your last line is four syllables.

I think you're still drunk.

So are you?

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads Thread Titles

Still 5 syllables.

*gives Thrill the finger*

Which of the four words is two syllables?

And yes, I am still drunk. Hey, it's the weekend.

ti·tle (ˈtī-təl)

How is the terminal liquid 'l' in "title" different from the terminal liquid 'l' in "aisle"?

Aisle is a diphthong
Title's t twixt ī and əl:
Syllable onset

So "dial" is one syllable, then?

At least Tank can count.
Apex, Bonk, and other tards
Can only dream it.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

ti·tle (ˈtī-təl)

How is the terminal liquid 'l' in "title" different from the terminal liquid 'l' in "aisle"?

Aisle is a diphthong
Title's t twixt ī and əl:
Syllable onset

So "dial" is one syllable, then?

Syllable? Diphthong?
Depends on your dialect
Let the tongue decide

[Tinker to Evers to Chance]

Front-running LeBron
Who trusts not his own talent
Jordan still greatest

I hope Jordan dies
He planned his fathers murder
In Hell together

That's not very nice.
I'm so sorry for my anger-
Still don't like the douche.

You lose this thread, just like the Bulls thread.

Fatigue, emptiness—
Interpreted correctly:
Loss of manly thread

/forTEC

Peace sign/"Born to Kill"
Jungian Duality
Where's that fucking tank?

[Brownie]

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads

I was drunk.

Also, your last line is four syllables.

I think you're still drunk.

So are you?

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads Thread Titles

Still 5 syllables.

*gives Thrill the finger*

Which of the four words is two syllables?

And yes, I am still drunk. Hey, it's the weekend.

ti·tle (ˈtī-təl)

How is the terminal liquid 'l' in "title" different from the terminal liquid 'l' in "aisle"?

Aisle is a diphthong
Title's t twixt ī and əl:
Syllable onset

So "dial" is one syllable, then?

At least Tank can count.
Apex, Bonk, and other tards
Can only dream it.

Would Apex dare count
April roundball games won by
Purdue. Zero, no?

[Gilgamesh]

Irish Yeti peed,
on golf course; cute cart girl saw;
tears, laughs, joy and shame.

[Gilgamesh]

Irish Yeti peed,
on golf course; cute cart girl saw;
tears, laughs, joy and shame.

If he turned too quick
the penis exposed, her love
for him certainly shows.

[Bonk]

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads

I was drunk.

Also, your last line is four syllables.

I think you're still drunk.

So are you?

Bonk Is Much Better
At Haiku Than Composing
Dead Pool Title Threads Thread Titles

Still 5 syllables.

*gives Thrill the finger*

"Titles" is still one syllable, I believe, if that's the one you're saying is two.

And yes, I am still drunk. Hey, it's the weekend.

I curse you for inadvertantly drawing attention to my garbled syntax, Bonk.  

And I was trying to compliment you!

My teacher was drunk
We found hooch inside her desk
Now I'm a moran

*true story, including the part about me being a moran. My sixth grade language arts teacher in Glen Ellyn was constantly drunk, and I had her last bell that year when she was good and lit.

[Bort]

Bort is in deep shock.
Haiku thread: fascinating
Chicago Cubs, no.

[Tonker]

There was a young man of Japan
Whose limericks haikus never would scan
When told this was so
He replied "Yes, I know
But I always like to try to get as many words into the last line as I possibly can."

EDIT : much better.

[Slaky]

There was a young man of Japan
Whose limericks never would scan
When told this was so
He replied "Yes, I know
But I always like to try to get as many words into the last line as I possibly can."

Best haiku ever.

[Tonker]

There was a young man of Japan
Whose limericks never would scan
When told this was so
He replied "Yes, I know
But I always like to try to get as many words into the last line as I possibly can."

Best haiku ever.

This is a haiku thread?  Fuck.  I'll be back in a minute.

[Brownie]

There was a young man of Japan
Whose limericks never would scan
When told this was so
He replied "Yes, I know
But I always like to try to get as many words into the last line as I possibly can."

Best haiku ever.

This is a haiku thread?  Fuck.  I'll be back in a minute.

Tonker wears Orange
Today for his football team
Led by Jake Utler?

[MAD]

Front-running LeBron
Who trusts not his own talent
Jordan still greatest

I hope Jordan dies
He planned his fathers murder
In Hell together

That's not very nice.
I'm so sorry for my anger-
Still don't like the douche.

Don't worry; I laughed.
You're still a trolling dickface
When it comes to Bulls.

[Internet Apex]

Front-running LeBron
Who trusts not his own talent
Jordan still greatest

I hope Jordan dies
He planned his fathers murder
In Hell together

That's not very nice.
I'm so sorry for my anger-
Still don't like the douche.

Don't worry; I laughed.
You're still a trolling dickface
When it comes to Bulls.

But don't sell me short.
My Pacers hate knows no end;
A hoop vagabond.