2010-11 Cubs Offseason: I, For One, Welcome Our New .196-Hitting Overlord

[SKO]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

[World's #1 Astros Fan]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

I read the bolded part. 

If that's a joke, it's need to be funny.

[Internet Apex]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

I read the bolded part. 

If that's a joke, it's need to be funny.

You sound kind of asshurt.

[Quality Start Machine]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

I read the bolded part. 

If that's a joke, it's need to be funny.

You sound kind of asshurt.

His kid's nuts are bigger than his are.

[J. Walter Weatherman]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

I read the bolded part. 

If that's a joke, it's need to be funny.

Start reading here, peatwad:

http://www.desipio.com/messageboard/index.php?topic=7453.msg227480#msg227480

[R-V]

I'd support the re-signing of Kerry Wood to a one-year, incentive-laden contract with an option for another. But only if he promises to leave Mariano's medicine kit where he found it. I like my veteran relievers like I like my women: clean, natural and very, very hittable. 

So you want him to come back to the Cubs and get pounded? 

You're daft.

I'm not sure if you didn't read the bolded part, or just missed the joke in general. Neither would surprise me.

I read the bolded part. 

If that's a joke, it's need to be funny.

I understood and laughed at Apex's joke. But I don't have a brain cavity full of boiled potatoes.

[Brownie]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

[BH]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

I'd rather have Girardi as our bench coach than Ryno.

[Yeti]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

I'd rather have Girardi as our bench coach than Ryno.

Bench coaches are like my posts. They don't matter.

[BH]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

I'd rather have Girardi as our bench coach than Ryno.

Bench coaches are like my posts. They don't matter.

They said the same thing about hitting coaches. Then we got Rudy Jaramillo. Look at how shitty Texas's hitting was this year without him.

[Internet Apex]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

I'd rather have Girardi as our bench coach than Ryno.

I read this and you know what I did? I laughed.

[BH]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

I'd rather have Girardi as our bench coach than Ryno.

I read this and you know what I did? I laughed.

+12345

[CBStew]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

Then all of those Southsiders would have to admit that they loved Sandberg all that time.

[Slaky]

I hope Sandberg gets hired somewhere in the American League so I can root for that team.

TJ mode:

Brewers hire Joey Cora from White Sox.

Ozzie Guilen hires Ryne Sandberg as bench coach.

Guillen quits mid year to become full time Twiiter spokesperson.

Sandberg promoted to manager of the White Sox.

The skies are blackening, the skies are opening. The storm of the century seemed to fizzle, but expect more calamity. Chuck seems to be almost right...

Then all of those Southsiders would have to admit that they loved Sandberg all that time.

I can already hear it. Sandberg was always the one Cub I respected. He played the game right. He was a winner on a bunch of loser-filled teams.

Yep.

[R-V]

Lickstache gets the bench coach job, Phil Rogers sheds another tear of Sandberg asshurt into his gruel.